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Original poster

I’ve left, what do I do now?

38 replies

xxcatcatcatxx · 21/01/2023 06:29

Had enough of being screamed at for no apparent reason for days on end. DS woke up early and I was tidying bits, maybe being a bit loud. DP comes charging in screaming and slamming doors telling me to get the fuck out of his house. He’s not touched me before but he grabbed my arm so hard and I knew I had to go

I feel awful, I just ran. I left my son, he wouldn’t let me take him and I didn’t want to stress the poor bean out anymore.

luckily I have my own flat I’m headed to but what the fuck do I do now? How do I get my son? My work laptops at home? I need money? Shall I give it a couple of days to blow over?

OP posts:

gamerchick · 21/01/2023 08:13

You definitely need RL support. You're not ready yet to see him for what he is. Message your parents and ask them for help.

Original poster

xxcatcatcatxx · 21/01/2023 08:24

I imagine this is textbook and everyone will roll their eyes but I’m so embarrassed to tell anyone in real life. I haven’t said anything to anyone yet. I guess this is a normal reason to why people stay

OP posts:

rattlemehearties · 21/01/2023 08:46

You need to report to the police. You don't get legal aid to support child arrangements any more except for cases of DV. Gather evidence. His behaviour is unacceptable and you are normalising it. Stay gone.

Winniepoo · 21/01/2023 08:47

Now you've calmed down call women's aid, they'll help 💐

365names · 21/01/2023 08:49

You must call the police. This is about a paper trail. Otherwise it is your word against it

Ladybug14 · 21/01/2023 09:01

I honestly don't understand why you're not fighting for your child. If you don't report your partners behaviour NOW you are giving him control.

Surely your love for your child and you wanting to be the child's main carer, trumps embarrassment?

pawprintseverywhere · 21/01/2023 09:14

Not having a dig but how old is Son? You mention you have no "baby items" at your flat so I'm assuming he's young. Are you just going to let the Dad have him? There is no coming back from this... you get that right?

Original poster

xxcatcatcatxx · 21/01/2023 09:32

I’m sure we’ll sort out a schedule soon, or am I being extremely naive? He wouldn’t let me not see him surely

OP posts:

Original poster

xxcatcatcatxx · 21/01/2023 09:38

I just don’t want to feel like I’m stealing my son if that makes any kind of sense? His dads his favourite person in the universe. Has anyone been able to do an amicable split 50/50 with baby or am I genuinely delusional

OP posts:

lovem · 21/01/2023 09:50

Oh so it's a baby you've left behind with violent and terrifying partner.

MiCasaEsTuCasota · 21/01/2023 09:52

Good god you are not stealing your OWN SON. You are removing him from an environment where you have been experiencing verbal/emotional and now physical abuse. You need to act now rather than worrying about future plans for custody etc. The longer you leave your son there the more he has the ability to say ‘well she walked out and left us’. Is that what you want? You need to take decisive action now.

gamerchick · 21/01/2023 11:20

xxcatcatcatxx · 21/01/2023 08:24

So when he tells people first that you've walked out on him and your baby and what a bad mother you are. You'll be ok with that then?

uncomfortablydumb53 · 21/01/2023 14:08

Go back and get your son!
Just because he hasn't hurt him before doesn't mean he won't now
Tell your friends and family.. The shame is his not yours
Call womens aid OR you can go to any boots store and " Ask for Ani" now then call womens aid whilst there,

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