DS was attacked on the way home from school.

[Whatshouldhappenhere]

DS is 12 and in year 8. He would ordinarily get the bus home and should have been on the bus on Tuesday but the bus company sent a small coach and the driver stopped allowing children on once it reached capacity meaning DS had to walk home (50 min walk).

On his way home he overtook three boys from his year. He didn’t know the boys and had never interacted with them before this, he didn’t even know their names. As he walked past them, one of the boys ripped his airpod out of his ear so DS snatched it back, shouted at them and ran away. After a short while, DS could see they weren’t chasing after him so he decided to stop running but then the boy who had snatched the airpod did start running so a chase ensued. When the boy caught up with DS, he proceeded to start punching DS in the face and had punched him 4-5 times before a woman who lived on the street intervened and he ran away.

The woman kindly drove DS home and I took DS to her home yesterday to thank her with some wine and chocolates. She invited us in and told us she witnessed the attack and said the other two boys were there too (this is with no prompt from DS that any other boys were involved). DS didn’t see the other two boys so wasn’t aware they were nearby.

I informed the school as soon as I found out what had happened and they told me they had passed the message onto the student liaison officer who would call me back. I also called 101 and an officer is visiting to take a statement on Saturday. The SLO called me yesterday morning to ask for the full story and said he would speak to DS first thing. It transpired that the boy who attacked DS was expelled before Christmas so the SLO told DS there was nothing the school could do. There was also no attempt to find the other two boys, we still don’t know their names.

I just spoke to the SLO again and he reiterated that they are unable to do anything because the boy has been expelled. When I asked about the other two boys, he simply said that DS has said they weren’t involved so he didn’t feel any further action was necessary. When DS said they weren’t involved, he meant they didn’t attack him but they clearly witnessed it because the woman who helped said there was three boys. The SLO hadn’t even attempted to find out who they are to speak to them which is frustrating in the least.

I’m just really upset it even happened. He should have been on the bus so this situation should never have occurred but obviously he should be safe walking home from school anyway. I’m disappointed with the school’s response as well, it feels as though they just want to wash their hands of it because the main perpetrator is no longer their pupil. Are the school right here or is there anything else I should/could be pushing for? DS is a really great kid who has never been in trouble and would never provoke anyone, he was literally just walking past the wrong people.

The attacker 's ID and age are known (by school) so the police can pursue a complaint of violent assault and attempted theft. With an adult witness.

I thought this would happen too in all honesty. Thank you all for your responses. I’m thoroughly disappointed in the outcome and do want to pursue this further. I doubt it’s his first contact with the police either, particularly since he has done something serious enough to be expelled in year 8.

I would also want and expect my child to be punished if they did this too so l didn’t really get the police officer’s point. I also didn’t agree with it being heat of the moment. Taking the airpod, sure, they were probably larking around (although it’s obviously not funny) but chasing and punching him multiple times no.

I’ll give the community police officer a call for some further clarification on their policies. The PO didn’t really bother with details, didn’t ask for the witnesses address or anything. He was honestly here for five minutes, I was really shocked.

Please phone the police back. Get someone's name, ask for it to be recorded on your case file. tell them that you are unhappy with the person who took the statement attitude, too blasé. You'd like it escalated and the boy charged with assault.

I can’t seem to find details for a community police officer anywhere. Do I just call 101 to get in touch? I do want this to be taken further, I don’t think a short chat with him and his parents is sufficient personally.

Don't let it lie OP. Get on Twitter and make it public. Name and shame the offender and the police constabulary that are refusing to do anything.

My son was attacked too by a schoolboy from his school. His nose was broken which resulted in an operation to reset it. We chose to press charges and the police were involved.

Have they actually recorded it as a crime? You can make a formal complaint if you aren’t happy with how the case was handled. I would be doing that in your case. If an adult was punched in the street they would expect it to be taken seriously, why not with a child?

Dont do this, you will cause yourself a lot of trouble.

OP I really hope your son is OK, and this other child is prosecuted.

I understand what the police officer is saying about dragging children through the legal system. But on the other hand he's basically allowing the boy to get away with assault and showing him he can do this again. I agree with following this up with the police. Ask them to pursue charges if they won't you have conformation and then you can make a complaint.

The boy must also be in another school, speak to the school liason and ask about this. School can talk to each other. Also I don't agree the school are not even talking to the other boys. So I'd be getting in touch to request this happens.

Also so sorry this happened. You sound like you are being really supportive.

Sounds like they are trying to fob you off. Whatever you do don’t take this up on social media.

First ting to understand is that a single juvenile conviction can negatively impact but does not have to “ruin his life.” What does ruin young offenders lives is repeatedly getting convicted having engaged in a protracted course of criminal activity. Don’t accept the line from some PC trying to avoid the paperwork.

Do you have the crime reference number? If not go the police station and ask for it. If they don’t have one ask to file a complaint and have them record it property. When you go in, ensure you ask the name of everyone you speak to and write it down in front of them (also write down the collar number). Ask if they can see who the officer who come and “came by for 5 minutes to fob me off.” Each extra officer who’s name you have and can attach to mishandling a case will be increasingly uncomfortable with the case being allowed to end up as a mess.

Once you have the reference number write to the Police and Crime Commissioner for your force and state that your son was violently attacked by one youth from a group who had pursued him (mention the word “gang” in a firm such as “I don’t know if this was a gang related issue but that needs to be considered”) and words to the effect of “the officers involved seem to have decided they need to protect a violent criminal, not the victim of a crime.” Name the officer who came be for 5 minutes and say how dismissively they took it, if you have verification of the time they were there record that (Ring doorbell showing arriving and leaving?). Any other officers you interacted with, mention if they appeared helpful.

Copy in the local MP, all your local councillors, etc.

If not acting is more risky than the effort of doing their job people tent to get on with it.

I phoned 101 and the operator said he’d get the PC investigating to call us straight back but nobody did so I’ll be calling again tomorrow. I will complain if they choose not to take this further. It is recorded as a crime, yes and the operator said the investigation is still open.

The school said they would be informing the boy’s new school, I spoke to the assistant head on the phone on Thursday and he assured me this would happen so I hope so. l

I just think it’s sickening that anyone can get away with viciously assaulting someone else who was literally just walking down the street minding their own business.

Can you phone your local police station instead of a centralised number?

I stupidly didn’t get the PC’s name earlier and we don’t have a ring doorbell. I know what time he turned up, he was ten minutes late so I remember it. When I next call up I will ask for his name. I’ll look into a number for our local station now.

Thank you so much for your advice, it’s really invaluable to me. I’ll be taking the steps you mentioned, I especially agree with your point about the PC protecting the perpetrator over the victim.

That sounds infuriating!

My 13-yr-old was physically assaulted at school last term and even though the perpetrator is known and video evidence is with the police, it's taken ages for them to get involved. Initially, the school police officer was keen to get my DC and me to agree for the perpetrator to be spoken to sternly and for that to be the end of it. Because of the nature of the assault e.g. unprovoked, premeditated, deliberately done to maximise humiliation along with a few other unpleasant details, I felt it was important for the perpetrator to experience a rather stronger consequence (they weren't excluded from the school which is what the behaviour policy said should happen) so pushed for it to be managed more formally.

As a result, my DC has given a formal police statement and that will be looked at alongside the video footage by an officer who decides what happens next. We're hoping the perpetrator will be required to attend a formal interview at the police station so even if nothing further comes of it, a message has been sent to the perpetrator that choosing to physically assault someone has consequences.

If you're struggling to get through on the phone, sending your local force a DM on Twitter is often effective; they can add info to the incident file or ask the officer involved to get in touch if you provide the reference number.

Dont get me wrong, I want this followed up, and the child charged, and hopefully getting a criminal record.

However, there is another consideration, These two children could be in the same community for the next 70 years, and you don't want a life long feud between them, whatever you ay feel personally.

There may be an element of "game playing" worth it here, of going along with "restorative justice" etc, even if you dont feel like it. YOu dont want this perpetrator feeling he has a grudge against your child 10 or 20 years down the line.

AS a teacher, I have seen such grudges carried on into the next generation.

I hope I am explaining my meaning, closure is important for your son, but this other boy also need to feel he has been treated proportionately, and that might mean some compromise from you

It is not necessarily fair, but it is pragmatic

The school engages the bus company? Was there any advance warning that there wouldn’t be any transport home for your son that day?

I think the school is liable here, or partly liable anyway, because the incident happened while your DS was walking home alone and he shouldn’t have been in that position.

I am so sorry you are going through this OP. How unfair for your son.

I work in a school. As others have said, the school cannot take action against a pupil no longer on their roll as they have been permanently excluded.

In terms of the other boys, they can’t do much until/unless they are identified. If this happened in my school, there would be some work with the year group around behaviour outside school etc. Possibly with police beat officer. If the two boys were identified and found to be involved in the incident, school are able to take action (eg suspension). If they were found to be bystanders who were too scared to be involved, I would at the very least expect a discussion with them and their parents.

Realistically
Can your dc identify the other boys?
If not all the school could do is ask students if they know anything about this incident and wait for someone to come forward. They could then speak to the boys and warn them about being involved with the other expelled student. They could also let their parents know. That is really all they can do.

The police may do more if you push on them. However again you do need to consider that you don't know anything about the expelled student and their family. They could be dangerous to get further involved with. At the moment your ds is an unknown kid he hit. You do not want this little shit making your ds into an enemy in any way. Personally I would focus on your ds and also make sure that he can protect himself in the future.

When I was 14, I was victim of an unprovoked attack by both people from my school year and a couple from another school. I had to have surgery to fix some of the damage they did. They were all prosecuted and ordered to do some kind of community service, as well as pay compensation. The school however didn't exclude/expel the individuals and I spent the next two years facing them daily.

If you take the matter to the police then they should assist you, otherwise the school sound like they've done more than some.

How awful! Your poor son.

A similar thing happened to my child - assaulted by a group, helped in the end by an adult.

Eventually, (after a whole year!) 2 of those involved were charged with assault. Don’t be surprised if you go months without hearing anything. I phoned regularly for updates, which meant spending half an hour on hold.

Parents of the those involved weren’t remotely interested or apologetic. Unsurprisingly, their kids have been in lots of bother since.

I paid for private counselling for my child. I worded it as someone to talk to other than your nagging/annoying mother - you can even moan about me while you’re there! If you can afford this, I would recommend it.

And there were no repercussions for my child - those involved steered clear as soon as the police were involved.

Police are a waste of time, my son was robbed at knife point by someone he knew from school. Police did bring him home after but then dropped the whole thing and never called back. I think they are swamped but to me this is why people go on to do bigger things as there is no deterent

"restorative justice" is actually a formal matter where they attacker is in the system and further escalation can look back on the earlier failure to engage withe the other attempts to change behaviour.

A PC saying "I can't be arsed" and shutting a case because they are too lazy to do their job is nothing of the sort.