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GP is trying pressure me into smear test. Is this acceptable?

420 replies

Enfys1982 · 04/01/2023 14:51

A fortnight ago I had a UTI which was treated with a short course of antibiotics. It cleared up but then came back again so I was prescribed more AB’s and did a sample, they couldn’t grow a culture from the sample but I did have raised white blood cells. When the GP rang me to discuss it she initially asked if I could repeat the test and we’d take it from there she noticed on my notes that I was a due a smear and said she wanted to check my cervix as well. For reasons I don’t want to go into I don’t want a smear test, but she went on and on me and basically pushed me into making an appointment with a nurse rather than rechecking my wee sample. I didn’t feel I could say no or explain my reasons why, she didn’t ask me why I felt the way I did either.

Honestly I feel much better now. The unpleasant symptoms have gone so I cancelled the appointment and she’s now phoned me up and asked why I cancelled. I said I felt better and I was busy when my appointment was booked for (both true) but she continued to push and implied that she wouldn’t run any further tests until I’d had my cervix examined. Just thinking about it is making me have a tight chest and panicky I really don’t think I could face it unless I was knocked out. I don’t have any gynae symptoms, my periods are normal etc. I had a fucking UTI! Why is she pushing me to have an invasive test I don’t want or need abs which isn’t relevant to what was wrong with me? She’d already asked if I was currently sexually active and I said no.

The more I think about it the more feel angry. I’ve had similar before from other staff at the practice when I’ve gone in for other things not relevant. Do they get commission for every smear they do or something?

OP posts:
FrostyFifi · 04/01/2023 17:04

Some of the replies here are really horrible. Stop abusing a woman for not wanting an intimate procedure ffs.

CM1897 · 04/01/2023 17:04

Nowthenhere · 04/01/2023 16:48

GP surgeries get paid for smears. There's a lot of money in it for them.
It is your body and your decision. You do not have to have this invasive procedure.
She is coercing and blackmailing you into something that you do not want and you are not ready for emotionally. You do not need to give anyone a reason why not.
It's completely okay to say no.
Personally I would contact the practice manager and put in a complaint with the GP and put it on your notes that you do not want this GP seeing you indefinitely. She's taking advantage of her position by refusing to accept no.
You are well though having a urology referral maybe where you are keen to get results from.
Water infections can also be a result of stress which she's making worse.
If the antibiotics do not work again it might be an idea to review your diet and look into a core muscle physiotherapy, they do not need to touch you either but can give you lots of options.
Stay strong, if you choose to become a mother this cervical examination coercion comes every time someone walks into the room your in when in active labour.

Why should she put in a complaint about her GP doing her job and trying to save her life? People will literally complain about anything now a days 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’m sure the OP would complain if the smear wasn’t offered and she ended up with cervical cancer

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:04

@lieselotte

I do indeed think the OP needs to grow up and stop blaming the doctor, sorry what was your point? I stand by what I said.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

lieselotte · 04/01/2023 17:04

GP’s and nurses can be very supportive about smears I’ve always found them to be very helpful and would prescribe diazepam etc

I've had both experiences. Last time the nurse was lovely and it wasn't too bad. The time before the nurse made me feel like a wimp and it was very unpleasant.

I guess the lack of empathy on here is mirrored among the nurses that carry out the tests.

allboysherebutme · 04/01/2023 17:05

I'm sorry I don't see why anyone would not want to do something that can potentially save your life, it doesn't even take five minutes, if you're due one, you are due and that's that.

It's better to be safe than sorry.
Jade Goody comes to mind Bless her xxxx

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:06

@lieselotte

Thats a shame. My nurses have always been fantastic. Super professional. I would never think to blame them though if I chose not to have a smear. What an odd mentality.

FrostyFifi · 04/01/2023 17:07

I'm sorry I don't see why anyone would not want to do something that can potentially save your life, it doesn't even take five minutes, if you're due one, you are due and that's that

You really can't imagine a scenario where something like that might cause trauma? Think a bit more carefully.

Anyway if you don't want something up your vagina, you don't want something up your vagina and that's that.

lieselotte · 04/01/2023 17:08

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:04

@lieselotte

I do indeed think the OP needs to grow up and stop blaming the doctor, sorry what was your point? I stand by what I said.

My point is that the smear test might have saved your life.

But we are not all the same, we do not all have the same bodies and we don't all have the same feelings and experiences. Smear tests are never pleasant but they've become progressively more painful for me so I completely understand why women are scared of having them.

The OP has reasons for not wanting it. That isn't about growing up, it's having reasonable concerns about an unpleasant procedure. Your attitude lacks empathy.

FrownedUpon · 04/01/2023 17:08

She’s trying to help you. Don’t be so defensive. A smear test could literally save your life.

lieselotte · 04/01/2023 17:09

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:06

@lieselotte

Thats a shame. My nurses have always been fantastic. Super professional. I would never think to blame them though if I chose not to have a smear. What an odd mentality.

Not sure where blame comes into this.

Naunet · 04/01/2023 17:09

God there are some nasty people on this thread. OP, Im a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, it took me 2 years of therapy to be able to go and get a smear (very ‘immature of me I know!). When I finally decided to go get one done, I asked for a trauma informed doctor or nurse, didn’t need to give details beyond that. The doctor I saw was lovely, she couldn’t have be kinder, there was no pain and it was actually very easy. Despite that I still had nightmares for about a week after and felt traumatised, because PTSD is a fucker!

If you have a similar background, please feel free to PM me. X

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:11

@lieselotte

I suggest you re read the OP then. There’s a lot of blame that the GP has caused her to feel anxious because they have advised her to have a smear.

CM1897 · 04/01/2023 17:12

lieselotte · 04/01/2023 17:03

That was you, and this is the OP. Telling her to "grow up" isn't remotely helpful (and this is not AIBU so apologise to her for the nasty remark).

I don't know why some women on here are so militant about smear tests. How does it affect you if someone doesn't want one?

(and yes, I am up to date with mine, although I do think they are really unpleasant, especially as I get older)

Technically it costs every tax payer if someone gets cervical cancer and needs treatment. So it’s in everyone’s interests for people to have their smear.

It wasn’t nice to tell someone to grow up though

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:13

@Naunet

Who on Earth on this thread has called sexual abuse survivors immature?

What IS immature is blaming healthcare professionals for offering you a smear test.

Theluggage15 · 04/01/2023 17:13

ImprobablePuffin · 04/01/2023 17:04

People who think smear tests are important and necessary are idiots? Riiight.

Women who get angry with other women not choosing to have smear tests are idiots. Absolutely. Sorry you struggle with reading comprehension.

FairShare13 · 04/01/2023 17:14

Folks · 04/01/2023 15:41

I can definitely relate, op.

I had a wholly uncomfortable experience at my last smear test. I was actually in the surgery for my child’s routine vaccinations when the nurse noticed I was overdue for my smear test. She pressured me into doing it there and then. Meanwhile my toddler was running around the room opening drawers and bins, all the while the nurse is huffing, sighing and telling me to relax or this will hurt. It did hurt.

I haven’t had one since. Said toddler is now 8. I feel that you should look into getting some help for the issues that are preventing you from having this procedure. I’ll take a deep breath and make an appointment for myself!

Why on earth would you bring a toddler to a medical appointment. Completely your fault you had a bad experience if you couldn't relax because of your toddler. Or did you expect the nurse to watch your toddler whilst also doing your smear test 🥴

Theluggage15 · 04/01/2023 17:15

@FairShare13 can’t you read?

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:15

If a women does not want a smear then good luck to them, their choice. Bit silly blaming GPs though. Understood?

VahineNuiWentHome · 04/01/2023 17:15

FairShare13 · 04/01/2023 17:14

Why on earth would you bring a toddler to a medical appointment. Completely your fault you had a bad experience if you couldn't relax because of your toddler. Or did you expect the nurse to watch your toddler whilst also doing your smear test 🥴

Because everyone will always have someone to look after a toddler….

Naunet · 04/01/2023 17:17

DarkKarmaIlama · 04/01/2023 17:13

@Naunet

Who on Earth on this thread has called sexual abuse survivors immature?

What IS immature is blaming healthcare professionals for offering you a smear test.

Do you understand there’s a difference between offering and pressuring? Don’t you think doctors are aware that many women have suffered sexual abuse and therefore have trauma reactions around a smear? Might be wise to use a little empathy. If a doctor had tried to push me into having one, it would have had a completely detrimental impact.

allboysherebutme · 04/01/2023 17:17

@FrostyFifi
Not when it's life saving no I can't imagine why anyone would not want to do it, I hate it myself, but I make myself do it, better to do it than end up dead.

Bangolads · 04/01/2023 17:17

You’re doctor is trying to save your life. You’d do more than kick yourself if you went on to get cancer. If their bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired why not gently feed that back to the surgery?

FrostyFifi · 04/01/2023 17:18

Why on earth would you bring a toddler to a medical appointment. Completely your fault you had a bad experience if you couldn't relax because of your toddler

You're right, she should have tied it up outside.

BenCoopersSupportWren · 04/01/2023 17:18

OP, I have some sympathy. I was sexually assaulted by a male GP - I wasn't having a smear at the time, but because of the nature of the assault it put me off having one for about 10 years. Then I almost lost a friend to cervical cancer; I'd moved house and changed GP practices by then so I finally womanned up and made an appointment. I explained to the nurse that I had some trauma around it and was very nervous, and also that the nurse who carried out my first, pre-assault, smear had told me that I am 'very small' inside (I've had problems using tampons on and off too). She was very understanding, patient and gentle and it was a completely different experience to my first, rather brisk and quite painful test. I won't pretend it's enjoyable, then or since, but it's bearable and over quickly.

I do think you were a little unreasonable to say the doctor should have "tried to find out the reasons why". That sounds as though you would have told her your issues if she'd only asked the right magic question, which is an immature way to go about it. It would make much more sense for you to tell her rather than expect her to engage in 20 Questions.

Of course you don't have to have a smear test but given it could save your life, in your shoes I'd really try to overcome your fear - in fact in your shoes I did! - and have a chat with the practice nurse to talk through the options. I suspect you'd find the reality far less awful than the 'fear of the unknown' picture you have built it up in your head.

Adviceneeded200 · 04/01/2023 17:18

You aren't being unreasonable b7t it's not uncommon for tests for one problem to lead to diagnosis of another. So, there may be a good reason for them wanting to check.

Now you also have a good reason why you don't want it done. They are very busy now so I don't think they would be hassling you unnecessarily. However, it's a pity you didn't have the opportunity to explain why.