Is it possible to to from 'happy' to 'divorce' in one argument

[huggy100]

I don't even know what to say
It's been 24 hours since our biggest ever row and I can't even seem to think about moving on
He's apologised but it doesn't even touch the surface
I'm struggling (and failing) to hold it together in front of kids and feel fucking terrible about that too
I'm heavily pregnant
He'll be keen to 'say sorry and move on'

I can't even begin to get into the details here but for clarity no DV/safety issues.

I don't know why I'm posting. Just devastated and don't know how we got here so fast. Am sat in a supermarket carpark crying and don't know who to speak to irl.
Want to ask him to go and stay somewhere else for the night but seeing as it's him that's holding it together and me that's in pieces it would probably be better if I left but I really don't want to do that.

I hope that I'm just catastrophising and pregnancy hormones are causing chaos but right now it feels like the end of the bloody world.

Didn’t want to read and run.
you’re pg, of course you can ask him to stay a night elsewhere regardless my lovely.

Gently, it does sound like it could be hormones. But that doesn't make it less shit and your feelings are valid.

What was the row about? Unless he has cheated/done something else unforgivable then I think it is possible to come back from it.

Depends on purpose of argument. I really don't think that it's fair one person can say to the other, I want to be alone, you need to leave especially if as you say no agression/threats/dv.

I suppose it depends what the argument was about and what was said - but no, I don’t think you can go from happy to divorce in one argument. It would imply that one, or both, of you was unhappy beforehand.

I wish I had. I kept giving him the benefit of the doubt.

Hard to advise based on what you have said but I'm inclined to say no, broadly speaking.

I think that as humans, we all say and do things that we thoroughly regret and wish we could take back. Maybe you need some time to think about what has happened and decide what's going to be the best thing to do.

I would tend to agree with this, unless what was said revealed an aspect of the other person’s personality or beliefs which you previously did not see.
Big arguments are horrible and you have my sympathy. If there is no violence or abuse or substance abuse and you have children, I think it is not wise to go straight to divorce though, without working out exactly what upset you, is the unexpected force of the argument or were things said which need unpacking and discussing more? It’s normal, I think, to take time to recover from a big argument. Big arguments are like having the rug pulled out from your feet, and I think you need reassurance that the rug is still there, so to speak. And it seems his ‘I am sorry’ has not reassured you enough.
But you probably need a bit of time to process yourself what is what and therefore I think the idea of doing some gentle relaxing things yourself is a good one.

It depends what the argument was about. If he has revealed that he earns his living by trafficking sex workers, or plans to move his elderly parents in so that you can care for them 24/7, or has been shagging his secretary for a year and a half, you might not be able to see him in the same light again.

We don't know what was said. If my DP revealed that they voted Leave, or for the Conservatives, or said something anti-semitic or racist, I guess I'd be seriously thinking how to end things. Or said they didn't love me any more. We've been together long enough that I know those things are terribly unlikely.

As others have said, I think it depends on what was said- but unless there’s been a major revelation or one person chose to be devastatingly cruel during the argument, I don’t think you can go from happy to divorced that quickly.

Is it the issue brought up in the argument or the way the argument was conducted which upsets you so much? Would counselling be a possibility to work through it?

See, if I were married to someone and I found out they were so prejudiced and small-minded that they they thought voting conservative or Leave was on a par with being racist or anti-semitic, I’d be reconsidering my view of them.

I’ve never heard a leaver saying they would exclude a remainder from their dating pool, but I’ve seen it a lot the other way around. Which tells you everything you need to know about which of those two groups is the intolerant one.

Voting Leave or for the Conservatives, are of course, definitely not on a par with racism or antisemitism. They are, however, things that would tell me that person had nothing I valued in common with me. Sorry you don't like that, but here we are.