Already building myself up for disappointment

[deflatedbirthday]

I changed my username this time last year... it says it all.

It's my birthday on Sunday. One week after Christmas. It's always been shit but my mum always made the effort if others didn't.

I'm married now and I share this bloody awful birthday with my DSS. I always make the effort for him. Cake. Decorations. Birthday tea. I would never want him to feel the way I have done/ do.

I'm lucky if I get a card or an acknowledgment it's my birthday before 4pm on the day.

I'm in my 30s and I know I sound like a spoilt bloody brat. I'd be happy with a card.

DH is truly wonderful in many many way but he is utterly rubbish at celebrations. And he really wouldn't be bothered if he got nothing for his birthday (but I'd never do that to him no matter how many times I've thought about it!).

I think it's just a difficult time of year. I seem to put oodles of effort into Christmas and birthdays for everyone else (DSD birthday is Jan too) and get completely sod all in return. And the build up to fuck all is even worse. I know it's coming. I'm bracing myself.

Sorry for the whine-y waffle!

YANBU. You need to have a calm conversation with DP that this matters to you and what you would like to happen.

Make the day all for you, plan it to do the things you want to do. Tell your bloke you're sick of feeling like shit and not getting a smidge of your birthday needs. I couldn't give a toss if he's not bothered, we all do stuff for other we're not bothered about. How hard is it to get someone a nice card?

Sunday is your day off. You're doing absolutely fuck all that day, starting with a lie in. He is holding the fort. Be loud about your needs here.

Many many conversations have been had in the past. It's not that he doesn't care he's just a bit thoughtless when it comes to things like this. I struggle to articulate it without coming across like a spoilt child.

Literally as soon as I pressed send on my OP he popped his head round the door with a cup of tea and said he's taking me on a date tonight (DSC will be with their DM). So he's not all bad...