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DH's family give me the ick!

12 replies

Fussyfancylady · 27/12/2022 08:04

Me and DH have been married for over 20 years. I have known his family since I was young so I guess we are all pretty comfortable with each other. The problem is that this Christmas they have grossed me out with their familiarity. We hosted DBIL and DSIL just for the day before Xmas (with their partners and children).

There was endless burping, farting, snot snorting and gross story telling. They have always been like this but as I get older I am starting to struggle with it. I get that we have known each other a longtime and they are comfortable in the each other’s company but I want them to act in a non gross way like they usually would in other peoples houses! They make me feel sick and at the moment I really don’t want to host them again. They constantly burp and don’t seem to realise that it’s gross.

My lovely mother In law is no longer with us and I miss her as they wouldn’t burp and fart in front of her! She was a very formal lady who really valued manner and politeness. Unfortunately her children have gone the opposite. I guess it’s a rebellion!

Just to add my DH has slobbish tendencies but since we had children has got better. He no longer burps at the table and wipes his face on his sleeve. I didn’t want him teaching the children this.

I thought I was a relaxed person but their company now makes me feel queasy. Really don’t want to host them for a festive family get together next year!

OP posts:
Fussyfancylady · 27/12/2022 08:05

Sorry that was meant to be DHs family give me the ick!

OP posts:
purplepencilcase · 29/12/2022 08:45

My FIL did an enormous belch at the dinner table once, I was so disgusted I've not eaten with him since.

Urgh!

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 29/12/2022 08:48

My dad blows his nose on an elderly hanky at the dinner table.

I see it as a control thing. Kind of, “I will do what I want and don’t you dare challenge me…” attitude.

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FrankTheCondor · 29/12/2022 08:57

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

Feckthehallsagain · 29/12/2022 09:08

My FIL has a tooth pick which he uses at the table. It's horrible. I feel your pain but no idea what the answer is.

cptartapp · 29/12/2022 09:13

FIL manically strips the greasy turkey carcus with his bare hands, bits falling on the dirty lino he scrapes up and piles in a dish.
Makes me heave.

Fussyfancylady · 29/12/2022 11:55

Oh god all of these are making me feel sick! I have definitely got fussier as I get older but surely some table manners are not too much to expect!

OP posts:
Vegetablesupreme · 29/12/2022 12:35

Feckthehallsagain · 29/12/2022 09:08

My FIL has a tooth pick which he uses at the table. It's horrible. I feel your pain but no idea what the answer is.

My DF (father not friend) does this too!! I'm so used to it now though that I don't bat an eyelid!

lurkinglittleladybug · 30/12/2022 02:29

My MIL is like this, she chews with her mouth open and spits particles of food all over the table as she talks with her mouth open… Makes me feel ill. DH has to force her to use baby wipes after because she gets in such a mess with gravy all over her chin and hands, she complains about it, but if he didn’t insist she would leave gravy paw prints all over the house and the new couch 🤢 … I just don’t know how some people can be so clatty , luckily she’s not round for dinner very often. It’s always a clean up operation after she leaves though! She also burps and will use the toilet at some point, giving us too much detail after 🤨 … How DH turned out so normal I will never know!

This year she also helped herself to my new slippers, she didn’t even wear socks 🤢

Fussyfancylady · 30/12/2022 09:02

@lurkinglittleladybug my mother in law was very strict about manners. I think her children’s lack of table manners is a rebellion!

OP posts:
FindingMeno · 30/12/2022 09:05

I can put up with most things tbh.
The one line I won't tolerate being crossed is farting at the dinner table.

Jo586 · 04/02/2023 19:43

Sounds horrible, good job you only see them a few times a year. I would find it gross too

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