9 year old sick with fever Sensory issues, suspected autism and possibly PDA

[Blueflag22]

Has been sick since being sent home yesterday but was fine this morning. Is very very difficult, unless you have a child with sensory issues and diagnosed as well then please don't tell me to that I need to try harder than I am. She took her Nurofen yesterday and perked up. Today has refused to take it being temperature down. I've tried everything, I am Exhausted and and even though she is sick she still screams at me and lashes out. Tells me she will take it later. Has no sore throat and apparently quite a few kids with cough and fever at school going around. I've always found it difficult but she was easier when she younger but is getting more and more defiant. I make her drink but I don't think it's enough. She just does opposite of what I say. Anyone with experience of working with SEN kids or have their own tell me now they deal with a child with definite suspected PDA when they are sick. High functioning. Her latest teacher who has experience with SEN children had noticed and told me day 2 of start of the year he has his suspicions.She masks really well.

You have my sympathies, sounds like my dd. Being tired, being thirsty and being under the weather sound like the perfect storm. Would she go for an ice pop? And one for you too? How else to deal with it? Carry on digging deep and dishing out the sympathy even if she isn't acting like deserves it.

Oh, OP. Didn't want to read and run. This is my DD too. Illness is always really exhausting, especially if there is a temperature as DD becomes quite distressed and confused and won't necessarily sleep, so we all end up sleep deprived.
All I can say is that DD has found ways of managing the sensory issues better as she's got older (although PDA has become more prevalent). Distraction is our go to strategy for almost everything.
Wishing your DD a swift recovery.

On a practical note I also use ice lollies. On medication - have you tried the calpol fast melts as opposed to liquid? That sometimes works with DS as he feels more in control ( and easier to take I think)?

If she doesn’t have a temp and is managing how she’s feeling without meds then I guess maybe just leave her? Even with temps we only really take to make a child feel better.

Thanks. she is sleeping now but will try later. As for ice pops I don't have àny but good idea. Calpol fast melts also sound better too. I've got nurofen double strength for her age and it's only one little spoon but even that is difficult..

Slightly different for me as my son is non verbal but we use suppositories as he simply won't take medicine he vomits it unless we can hide in juice. It's so so difficult. I don't really have solutions but much sympathy

Much sympathy, that sounds so difficult for both of you.

I second the Calpol fast melts, plus the Nurofen ibuprofen orange chewable capsules (they taste like Haribo!)

Lots of ice lollies/frozen juice lollies, if they'll take it. Or jelly/smoothies, depending on sensory issues - anything with high water content.

One of mine is a sensory seeker who tries to essentially out-run the discomfort of illness, refuses food/fluids etc, so I feel your pain!

Hope they're on the mend very soon.

My dd sounds similar, although we have the added issue of suspected ARFID going on, so even harder to get medication in to her. We’ve had times in the past when she has been on the verge of hospital admission as she is so dehydrated when she is ill and still won’t drink anything. I’ve got no real advice I’m afraid, dd will only take medication on her own terms, she has to be in control of everything. I’ve had success with leaving a syringe of calpol lying about in her room for her to take when she is ready in the past, but that’s it really. Sending sympathy and strength to you and I Hope your dd gets better quickly.

Huge sympathy. Mine has a huge aversion. to strawberry Calpol but is ok with cherry flavour paracetamol liquid (Lloyds and Asda both used to stock it, but I'm out of date) or a paracetamol capsule, not caplet, when old enough for a one tablet dose.

Cold flannel on the forehead or back of the neck - old school but underrated.

We've had the same! Recommend ice cubes, plain water ice lollies (or any lollies they like), jelly, melon, cucumber

Re neurofen chewable - both my DC say they are ‘spicy’, I tried them and I sort of know what they mean! They really hate them.

Saying that fast melts are sort of chalky so it depends which texture works best for your child!

I always have a stash of ice lollies, ice pops, full sugar drinks and jelly in in the hope DS will eat/drink one of them when ill.

It is really hard so you have my sympathy OP - I know as well it’s so hard to stay calm/relaxed, Im aware my DS picks up that I’m stressed which in turn makes him more determined.

Just wanted to come back and say she likes the fast melts calpol. Still coughing, still fever. Waiting for 111 callback just to double check. Still can difficult but getting there.

Result! well done. Hope she turns a corner soon. Double checking is a good shout. I don't think the system is really set up for DC who don't present typically, but individual HCPs tend to be very understanding.

It has got easier for us as he's got older but it's still one of the hardest things.

Rather than tell her she 'needs' to take the melts perhaps tell her that enough time has gone by to have some more melts and you will leave them on the bedside so she can take them if she wants. I haven't worked with a child with PDA but worked with a child with an attachment disorder who couldn't cope with being 'told' to do anything. The best way to handle it was to suggest things and for her to feel she was in control by enabling her to feel that everything was her choice. I found that she would generally make the 'right' choice if she felt no pressure and could pretend that the idea was hers.

Feel your pain @Blueflag22 but glad she's now taking something to ease the symptoms.

I know how you feel as dd 10 with diagnosed autism (I also believe pda but they won't diagnose where I live) is a nightmare when sick. I can't really offer any tips as what works one time with my dd won't the next - very frustrating 🤯

Taking medication is also a huge trigger as she thinks it doesn't do anything to help.

As long as she's drinking and weeing and temp not not high your doing well.

I found orange strepsils the best for her throat, unfortunately dd won't (can't) blow her nose either so takes ages to get the congestion to go - hold tight!