How did your life change at 40, did you change anything

[ApproachingTheBig40]

Very fast approaching the big 40.
I feel like my life is a big hectic stressful roller-coaster.
Wfh but choose my hours, i can do 5 a week or 30 my choice same salary, as long as job is done.
But i have 1 dc at 6th form 6 miles away
1 infants school close ish to home
1pre school 4 miles away
1dsc eow and during week, school 15 miles away (dh does that one)

Eldest generally gets bus unless torrential weather.

I feel like most parents its hectic juggling everything for each setting last week, 2 xmas jumper days, 2 plays, 1 choir performance, xmas fayre, craft fayre, cake sale, 1 x non uniform. 2 xmas parties, 1 of which at the setting, 1 a different hired location.

I was in and out like a yoyo.

Dh works various hours but is hands on when here. Bathing kids, books bed.
Hes not here in time to cook. That's fine im. Happy with that.

But i feel im constantly running around, work, house, kids like many. I literally don't find time for myself..

Example. Taken kids to see Santa,then park =muddy came back so bathed them early. Just doing dinner.
Then thought get 2 youngest and dcs in bed by 8 and movie and relax.
But remembered eldest is at an event until 10pm no bus back 10 miles away. So need to get them.

Im not Complaining that's life, i chose to have kids and i love the hussle and bussle. But im feeling 40 is very soon Ansd maybe I should be more relaxed?

Fwiw. I stress about housework.,laundry etc. Always listing what needs doing it never ends. Again dh does his share when here. Eldest mucks in too only if nagged at.
I know i need to chill more with that aspect.

The age/ life expectations Vs reality.
Life should calm down and be less hectic when your youngest becomes more independent. They can get themselves to and from school.

Your eldest will be working / uni in a year or 2 and then you'll only have the little ones to deal with day to day.

We adopted when I was 39.5 so my life with children was only just beginning. You've already done 16 years and another 16 to go!!

I think it’s really hard to comment on these threads because it’s difficult to know what can realistically change and what is a committed cost of previous decisions. 4 kids, 4 different schools is going to be a lot of admin but there’s not really much you can do about it in the circumstances. What I’ve done when feeling like the wheels are coming off is try to make a list of things I could change or enforce to make my life easier ( bed not made/ clothes and towels on floor = no iPad) and things that are a ball ache but it’s not realistic or is unfair on the kids to scrap ( Wednesday night rugby training). Also try to think of things that are a good time/money trade off.

Yes all very true i know once youngest goes to reception its easy as 2 youngest at same school. There is a nursery attached to it, they did go to. But they ignored an allergy! So removed instantly. And put to one the 4 year old went to. Id sooner the travel stress than worry my kid could become seriously unwell.

Eldest has 2 year at college. Then work. Not interested in uni unfortunately.

But i think i need to deligate a bit more especially to eldest, could definitely do more especially as has money and lifts all the time which take chunks out of my day. Where i could be getting on with stuff.