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I just realised I think I saved a girls life

33 replies

PennyRa · 12/12/2022 23:02

Reading about what happened with those poor children yesterday made me remember when I was in secondary school and would play on the frozen lake on the way home in winter. I would only ever go where it was safe, where I knew it would only go up to my knees if the ice broke like my mother had taught me. We would also play in it in the summer so I knew the depth pretty well.

One time, when I was in the upper school, I was on the ice and I heard an almighty smack, then a crack. I turned and saw in the middle of the lake, which was over 2 meters deep, a girl from the lower school standing there with a log smashing it into the ice.

I screamed at her to stop, get off the ice, get over here! She walked towards me still smacking and cracking the ice, completely oblivious to the danger she was in. She stopped just beyond where it was safe to go, where it would come up to your chest, and just said "What?!" And wouldn't move. The ice was cracking behind her so I decided to go out there grab her and drag her back, told her off, and made her go home.

The next day at school I got pulled out of class into a room with the girl, her mum, my head of year, and the police. She had told them I had assaulted her and intimidated her on her way home, I told them what actually happened, that there were witnesses, and you can see where she broke the ice still.

I'm not exactly sure what happened to her after that, but because of that incident the police patrolled the lake every time it was frozen, we had to have safety assemblies on it, and I got made prefect.

I've never really thought about how she could have died until now. Or how others could have if this didn't happen. I know that sounds odd, I just remember at the time that it was dangerous but thinking at worst you would end up in hospital.

I feel weird about this

OP posts:
RoseBucket · 12/12/2022 23:03

Why do you feel weird?

TeapotTitties · 12/12/2022 23:05

Why?

I saved someone's life just over a week ago and it was what it was. I was just lucky to be there at the time.

XanaduKira · 12/12/2022 23:05

Sounds like it's only just sunk in for you Op - well done.

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 12/12/2022 23:08

Someone posted on a different thread that you can still go into shock and die falling in icy water up to your knees.

PennyRa · 12/12/2022 23:09

RoseBucket · 12/12/2022 23:03

Why do you feel weird?

I don't know. I really never thought about it until now but I felt so hard reading about what happened to those children now I'm a parent not a child.

Like if I knew my life was in danger would I have gone out to save her, I can't know for sure. I mean I probably would have jumped in to save her had she gone under but it would have never crossed my mind that I could die

OP posts:
Georgeskitchen · 12/12/2022 23:11

I wonder if that girl watched the recent news and recalled the incident, and felt guilty about accusing you of assault

TinyBagEnergy · 12/12/2022 23:13

You should feel really proud of yourself OP, that was quick thinking and brave of you back then!

Walrus6 · 12/12/2022 23:13

It being shallow doesn’t make it safe. Partly as it’s so cold, and partly cos you fall in and end ip under an area of ice which isn’t broken, unable to reach the surface.

There is no part of a frozen lake which is safe. Teach your children not to play on it at all.

WhatTheHellIsAQuasar · 12/12/2022 23:18

You were also silly to think the ice was safe no matter how shallow the water - cold water shock could have done for you. Plus you being on the ice would have encouraged others, including this girl, to go out on it.

so while it’s great that you both survived, it was probably more luck than judgment.

PennyRa · 12/12/2022 23:22

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 12/12/2022 23:08

Someone posted on a different thread that you can still go into shock and die falling in icy water up to your knees.

Not with the stuff we wore. We had school walk waders and thermals with reflectors on

OP posts:
Feetache · 12/12/2022 23:25

You'd be a lot less likely to die if you could walk out.. but I think every parent in the land is reflecting on this incident. Reality is that in heatwaves too lots of DC die in water incidents sadly.,

PennyRa · 12/12/2022 23:27

Georgeskitchen · 12/12/2022 23:11

I wonder if that girl watched the recent news and recalled the incident, and felt guilty about accusing you of assault

I don't know. From what I remember from our few interactions I think she had some kind of sen. She genuinely seemed to not understand.

I just hope she's living a happy safe life somewhere

OP posts:
determinedtomakethiswork · 12/12/2022 23:27

TeapotTitties · 12/12/2022 23:05

Why?

I saved someone's life just over a week ago and it was what it was. I was just lucky to be there at the time.

Oh for God's sake, you couldn't even let her have that moment, could you, without taking it from her.

WeepingSomnambulist · 12/12/2022 23:27

Do you think she ever realised what danger she was in? When you explained what happened, did her face show any recognition that she was doing something really dangerous?

I just cant imagine anyone actually doing that. Walking on it or sliding around on it for fun is something kids do but an older ish child rather than a little tiny kid would know not to smash the ice they were standing on.

What was the reaction in the room after your explanation?

DuplicateUserName · 12/12/2022 23:31

PennyRa · 12/12/2022 23:22

Not with the stuff we wore. We had school walk waders and thermals with reflectors on

The kids had waders and reflectors on?

Was the whole thing organised?

RelentlessForwardProgress · 12/12/2022 23:33

Well done, @PennyRa
That was very brave.
A whole family dodged a bullet there because of you

IDontWantToBeAPie · 12/12/2022 23:35

Do you feel weird in that you just realise what could have happened. As in omg if I'd behaved differently we could've gone in and drowned?

I think it's normal to feel shaken when the seriousness of something from childhood sinks in and hits you as you didn't fathom it when you were small.

larkstar · 12/12/2022 23:44

It's quite possible you did.

I was a hardened indoor lane swimmer, swimming 300 25m lengths in 3 3hr sessions every week for about 3 years. I went to the Jesus Green Lido - an outdoor pool - 100 yards long - very early in the year a couple of years ago - it was my first experience of swimming in really cold water - I had done a bit but not much - it really hit me how even I, a fit swimmer was affected by the cold - of course i got in and mulched about trying to adjust to the cold water but thought it better to swim and get warmed up - my limbs soon started to turn to lead weights - I felt like I had no control over them - thank god there were lane dividers to grab on to - it was much harder than I thought so I can see why so many people get into difficulties so easily even fit people, even fit swimmers. I was in for an hour but it took me several hours to warm up again once I got out.

AthenaPopodopolous · 12/12/2022 23:47

You did save her life OP. She will be grateful for that in hind sight.
The same god awful stuff happens every year with people and children playing dangerously on icy water bodies. I’m so upset about those poor boys in Solihull.

PurpleButterflyWings · 13/12/2022 00:07

I hope, nobody takes any advice off the OP or does what she claims to have done. Over the past few days, the experts/rescue people/fire service/paramedics etc, have said DO NOT GO OUT ONTO THE ICE, if you see someone has slipped through and is in peril. It is extremely dangerous and will very likely lead to more fatalities. LEAVE IT TO THE EXPERTS.

Call 999, and tell them to get there immediately because someone has fallen through the ice. Just tell the person to try to get a grip on the edge of the ice somehow - this is what the experts said on TV earlier!!! Trying to deal with it yourself is extremely dangerous and foolhardy. It will risk your life, and the life of the person trying to rescue YOU and the person who fell through the ice, because there's a strong likelihood YOU will fall through too.

Real life is not like in the movies or TV shows where someone rescues someone from the cold waters when the ice has broken! In reality, the ice will very likely crack and YOU will go through to the sub zero temperature waters too!!!

Good grief @PennyRa I am not sure why you posted this thread, but I think it's quite a dangerous thing to post, because you're suggesting you saved a girl's life by going on the ice to pull her back! Confused Nobody should EVER do this!!!

PennyRa · 13/12/2022 00:13

WeepingSomnambulist · 12/12/2022 23:27

Do you think she ever realised what danger she was in? When you explained what happened, did her face show any recognition that she was doing something really dangerous?

I just cant imagine anyone actually doing that. Walking on it or sliding around on it for fun is something kids do but an older ish child rather than a little tiny kid would know not to smash the ice they were standing on.

What was the reaction in the room after your explanation?

I really don't know, I can't remember. After I told the whole story my head of year took me and one of the officers to her office for tea and biscuits.

OP posts:
PennyRa · 13/12/2022 00:16

DuplicateUserName · 12/12/2022 23:31

The kids had waders and reflectors on?

Was the whole thing organised?

Sorry, by we I meant me and my siblings, no matter how temporary, and enforced by my mother

OP posts:
GingerScallop · 13/12/2022 00:22

PurpleButterflyWings · 13/12/2022 00:07

I hope, nobody takes any advice off the OP or does what she claims to have done. Over the past few days, the experts/rescue people/fire service/paramedics etc, have said DO NOT GO OUT ONTO THE ICE, if you see someone has slipped through and is in peril. It is extremely dangerous and will very likely lead to more fatalities. LEAVE IT TO THE EXPERTS.

Call 999, and tell them to get there immediately because someone has fallen through the ice. Just tell the person to try to get a grip on the edge of the ice somehow - this is what the experts said on TV earlier!!! Trying to deal with it yourself is extremely dangerous and foolhardy. It will risk your life, and the life of the person trying to rescue YOU and the person who fell through the ice, because there's a strong likelihood YOU will fall through too.

Real life is not like in the movies or TV shows where someone rescues someone from the cold waters when the ice has broken! In reality, the ice will very likely crack and YOU will go through to the sub zero temperature waters too!!!

Good grief @PennyRa I am not sure why you posted this thread, but I think it's quite a dangerous thing to post, because you're suggesting you saved a girl's life by going on the ice to pull her back! Confused Nobody should EVER do this!!!

I am guessing the recent events in Solihull have awakened a memory and a realisation. I haven't seen anywhere where OP has said she is advising people to do the same. I think she's just processing what happened. The weird feeling is probably a kind of delayed shock.
I can't imagine any Mumsnetter reading this and then despite everything in the news, putting their waders and reflectors on to stand by a frozen lake to pull someone out. Or even using this post as a factor in deciding in a moment of panic to try and rescue someone from a frozen lake

Luredbyapomegranate · 13/12/2022 00:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Mellymoon · 13/12/2022 00:33

determinedtomakethiswork · 12/12/2022 23:27

Oh for God's sake, you couldn't even let her have that moment, could you, without taking it from her.

Exactly. Always one..