Christmas just too much......

[mids2019]

Generally.

We.are becoming increasingly a less religious society especially Christianity so in my opinion Christmas is losing its connection to its cultural routes. There shave in my life time been continuous complaints about excess e commercialism bubble this has reached a new level. December is now dominated by adverts for products with tenuous seasonal links and we are greeted with burgeoning Christmas ephemera and gaudy lighting. Just why?

We have this year a cost of living crisis coupled with a number of strikes and I find you have to have measure of cognitive dissonance to dissociate the world from the fuzzy indulgence fest of Christmas.

Do we culturally need to think about this or am I just the grinch?

I think of Christmas as a really nice ‘Sunday’, there will be a nice meal you may or may not see some extended family and there are some gifts involved.
I always have a nice time and I think I have realistic expectations of the day.

There IS escape, none of those things are compulsory

Sadly you're right. I long for the simple Christmases of my childhood in the 1950s and 60s. It now seems to be just frantic, stressful and hard work.

Do what you want, it’s not compulsory. Many people do not celebrate, many people go way OTT.

I don't begrudge anyone having the Christmas they want and in modern times Christmas may mean something slightly different to different people. Like Easter I don't think there is a universal mode of celebration. Time with the family and a break with work are obviously real positives.

However Christmas is an important time for companies to sell goods and those companies market Christmas in such a way that the gift giving becomes the dominant theme. There is real poverty in this country and I think there is a pressure from society for people to make unrealistic sacrifices for a few days of the year. Granted people don't have to go over the top but they do and will in the future. There are you banks now where people can donate toys to families that can't afford presents ; are people really under so much expectation?

toy

Christmas is an ancient European festival that pre-dates Christianity by thousands of years; I really wish more people would understand this.

It involves lights, evergreen plant life being brought indoors (holly, ivy, fir trees) and feasting three days past the mid-winter solstice, all symbols of hope of the return of life at a point when Europe was - and is - frozen solid.

Banning it did not do the Puritains much good....those who do not remember their history etc etc...

It involves lights, evergreen plant life being brought indoors (holly, ivy, fir trees) and feasting three days past the mid-winter solstice, all symbols of hope of the return of life at a point when Europe was - and is - frozen solid.

This, although I'm sure I't meant to be 2 weeks, hence the 12 days of Christmas adaptation when Christianity took over.

I celebrate Yule, which essentially is just a nice way of bringing light into some of the otherwise darkest and most miserable days of winter. Lights, evergreens, songs and feasting have been long-standing traditions way before Christianity arrived. And I like the gift-giving tradition that is associated with Christmas, but don't overdo it, so it still brings me joy to give to those around me.

The advertising is because companies need to sell products to survive. Bright, sparkly windows and adverts draw in customers. Simple as that.

I understand how you feel though. Try to avoid things that trigger you as much as possible and know that things will get better.

IMO a lot of the time we look back on our childhood Christmases (and then our own children’s) with rose-tinted glasses firmly in place. Then try to recreate that - which is impossible because they were never really as we remembered anyway.

And now a lot of people have the things they like or need already - slippers, gloves, jumpers - all the things that were standard gifts between adults in my 1970’s - 80’s childhood aren’t valued the same. So instead we buy gifts that aren’t really that valued by the recipient - if I really want something and it costs £30 I’d probably buy it for myself, I’d not wait several months until Christmas or birthday. We have more so we value less.

Yes and no.

I find the obligation stuff is the stuff I hate (including the i laws tbh) and that's the stuff that's harder to say no to. Though I have been very blunt this year.

Its very easy to get stuff with too many invites and feeling like you have to do them all. Dh has put his foot down and said he is only willing to do one Christmas party every year from now on and intends to rotate it. I think he had 4 or 5 for various organisations and work that he was invited to.

Then it's all the school related stuff. Make cakes for Christmas fayre, Christmas carols, Christmas jumper day, Christmas Dinner day (again none uniform). Christmas cards, school calendars. Thats where it all stacks up. Some you can say no to, some you can't.

Tbh, covid has made me just think about what I want to do and to make the effort to do that. And to say no to as much else as possible.

DS gets books and we've made a point to avoid plastic tat (relatives will accommodate that) and Dh and I buy ourselves stuff that we need / really want between Aug and Nov and then just doing surprises because it's stressful and farcical otherwise. Gifts for family are strictly books, booze or food.

I love the sparkly stuff and the music to the extreme but all the other stuff meh. Christmas day itself is always something of an anticlimax imo anyway. I much prefer the run up.

If we were to do Christmas in a traditionally Christian way then we would all be fasting and praying throughout advent ready for the feasting of Christmas. No one I know does this anymore!!!

PP is correct about the bringing in of light and life in the form of evergreens 🌲 ready to welcome new life at the years' darkest time.

It's understandable that Christianity chose this festival to celebrate welcoming new life and light in the form of Jesus.

Traditions evolve. But Christian or not, remembering to look for new shoots of life in midwinter whilst celebrating with family is not to be sniffed at.

Christmas for me means having get togethers with family and friends and quality time. I like buying a gift for each family member but I hold no ill will if they're not keen or ask to return & I don't give to receive. My DC are peak believing ages and it's joyful.

We do a big food bank donation, give toys to the Salvation Army and attend a christingle service so they can understand the different beliefs of Christmas. We're athiests as adults but we're open to letting the DC choose their own beliefs.

Not everything is about OTT and spending

Grinch I’m afraid. People can celebrate is anyway they decide. We don’t believe in god. Our Christmas starts on 1/12 and finishes on 28/12. We spent time together, see other family and friends, have takeaways, a few drinks and do everything that comes with having young children in school. We do the panto and on Boxing Day have an open house. Come 28/1 it’s like it never happened. House back to normal and decorations back in the loft. We aren’t interested in New Years Eve.

I am in my early 60s and have never had a Christmas driven by rampant commercialism. It may help that I didn't have children, but as far as I know my siblings families haven't either. I like and take part in some of the religious aspects, my sister is more into the solstice celebration, DH uses it as an excuse to break out his annual treat of good port and my DH's family pick and choose the parts they engage with. We all like good food, lights, warmth and getting together and exchanging modest presents. And then it's January and we forget about it all for another year.

Do your own Christmas, no one is making anyone do anything.

If people don't want to do certain things at Christmas don't do it, own your decisions

One day, when I have time, I am going to knit a jumper with the words "Christmas is not Compulsory" on the front.

Honestly, my winters have been so much more enjoyable since we realised that.

Traditions evolve. But Christian or not, remembering to look for new shoots of life in midwinter whilst celebrating with family is not to be sniffed at.**
Beautifully put

I don't think you are being a grinch one bit.

Two things come to mind, firstly in difficult time people tend to make more of events/nights out/festivals as a break from the norm, and secondly the upscaling of events in general (think hen weekends not hen nights as an example).