Can DD send a Christmas Card and Present to this TA who doesn’t celebrate Christmas?

[TheChristmasPresentDilemma]

DD has two 1-1 TAs due to an EHCP. She loves them both.

One of them doesn’t celebrate Christmas but DD wants to buy her a tub of sweets and send her a card.

This is the first year with this TA, she had someone different last year along with the other current one. We know she doesn't celebrate Christmas as DD asked her what she was doing on Christmas Day.

I don’t want to offend, but also don’t want to upset DD by not letting her. Plus we’re sending a card and tub of sweets to the other TA so don’t want this TA thinking we don’t like her when we do. Both TAs provide personal care as well as general support for DD in lessons (there are no behaviour issues bar a bit of cheekiness, which I’m assured is actually a good sign as it means DD is comfortable with them).

So can DD send a Christmas Card and gift to this TA?

You could a send a 'thank you' for your support type card instead of a Christmas card?

If you know she doesn't celebrate Christmas, then no. It would be rude.

You could send a "thank you for teaching me this term" card and gift.
Or a Happy New Year card and gift.

It's not a 2-1 situation btw, she has 1 TA in the morning then the other one in the afternoon, they both do a mix of each as they work with other children in the school at other times.

Yes absolutely. Get a card with a snowman on or something rather than anything religious

I wouldn't. I don't celebrate Christmas and finding awkward when people try and buy me gifts. The general thank you card sounds a better idea.

@Highlyflavouredgravy Ohh good idea, DDs seen some in the supermarket with dogs on which she knows the TA likes as she has a dog.

I'd get a blank card and write a little message in along the lines of "Just to let you know you are appreciated" and put sweets in a non Christmas gift bag.

I'd send the gift and a seasons greetings, thank you or new year card. Unless she's a Jehovahs Witness, then don't bother.

Frame it as a Thank you present.

@Stichintime Not JW I don't think, I suspect either Sikh or Muslim

I don't celebrate Christmas and have never been offended when given cards. I've been given many Christmas cards over the years by colleagues and neighbours. I'm always thankful and appreciate the thoughts and efforts. My son's nursery gave me a card just 2 days ago. Not a problem for me x

I would. Just make it a secular one and write Happy Holidays and a big Thank You inside - I can't imagine anyone would be offended by that.

Of course you can! I wouldn’t give a religious card but an wintery one would be lovely. It would be a very strange TA that wouldn’t appreciate a kind gesture from a child she spends a lot of time with.

I don't celebrate Christmas and work in the education. I have brought my kids sweets and treats but not cards. Lots of my students give me treats and cards which is lovely 🥰 I'm not offended, they aren't asking me to celebrate with them, they are sharing their celebration and I feel it would be rude to suggest their celebration is not as important as mine.
However, if you know it's nicer to do a normal card and gift and thank her for her support this term.

I'd not get either of them anything and do an end of year gift if you really must.

Yes I would give a gift because it's kind.
Because Christmas is a mix of traditions etc, it's actually not a solely religious occasion at all.

A thank you card is the appropriate thing to do in this situation.

If you are giving sweets, just be aware that anything with gelatin in can be an issue for Muslims. Something with beef gelatin, no gelatin or marked vegan would be OK.

How old is DD? Why would it upset her? Is she not old enough to understand that "some people don't celebrate Christmas", the same way that she may not celebrate Eid? I don't really understand giving teacher's cards and presents anyway tbh.

@BendingSpoons I was just thinking a tub of roses or similar

@Saxiee It would upset her to give to one and not the other when she loves them both, she loves giving people presents and celebrating them, she absolutely understands "Not everyone celebrates Christmas/Birthdays etc"

My Muslim friends and I always exchanged christmas cards and gifts when we were in school together.

I think that a thank you card and the gift would be fine. She would have to be pretty uptight to be offended by it.

Yes. The intention isn’t to cause offense. Your DD is being really thoughtful and that’s to be encouraged

Most Sikhs, Hindus and Muslims that I know have celebrated Christmas in a non religious way; they have Christmas trees and presents. Jews have Chanukah but many non orthodox have trees and the like - my neighbours do and always give me a card and gift. I reciprocate with a Chanukah card and a secular one with 'Seasons Greeting's' written on or in it.

A 'Season's Greetings' card would be best and I'm sure she will absolutely love a gift.

I think a thank you card and a small gift is a lovely idea.

My Hindu colleague always takes part in Secret Santa, has sent us all Christmas cards in the past and is often the one to put the office tree up as his role is quieter in December than other departments.

Not celebrating Christmas doesn't necessarily equate with being offended by it.