Would this routine tire you?

[peachygood]

And if so, how many days a week could you manage it?

5.45am-7.15am - up, feed dog, get showered and ready for work
7.15-8.15/8.30 drive 50 miles to work
8.30-5pm - work
5-6pm either keep working or go to gym
6-7pm drive 50 miles home
7-7.30pm walk dog
7.30-8.30 cook and eat dinner, put a load of washing on, general housework
8.30-9pm relax, watch TV, play on phone
9pm bed and generally fall asleep by 10/10.30pm

I’m exhausted! But it doesn’t seem like a particularly busy schedule. Any tips for helping me feel less tired?

I don’t like getting up before 7am, so from the start it would be tiring for me.

Regardless of what others think, the current set-up isn’t working for you, so you need to start thinking about changes.

Well, of the things you can change I think knocking the dog walks on the head during the week is sensible. If he’s being walked for an hour and a half at least each day does he really need another decent half hour walk after work? I’d just let him out for a wee and then do big walks at the weekend.

It’s a long day and couldn’t do it every day. Does that mean your dog is home all day without a walk until 7pm??

I would be tired doing this. I also would stay in bed longer. I would rather sleep than spend 1.5hrs getting ready in the morning. The most I spend is 30mins, my DH has to get up earlier and have a cuppa / wake up etc.
Showering in the evenings is one way I cut down time in the morning.

I'd cut down the 1.5 hours to get ready for work! Then you can have an hour extra in bed!

Why don't you leave at five? Is it because of traffic? When do you actually get to see your son? How old is he?

I used to have a similar commute. Didn't have a dog. Tiring but manageable and I did fit in stuff in the evenings. Big difference is I can get up and out in about 30 minutes, you're taking 90 minutes.

I'd set an alarm for 06.30 to leave at 07.15. That would make a big difference. Don't think feeding the dog takes the extra 45 minutes.

During my 20's up to late-30's including after having babies x 2 I did very similar - see below - and at the time managed perfectly well although when I dropped to 4 days after baby #2 it was HEAVEN. Living in the home counties/nearish to London, a 1.5 hr commute and 12/13 hours day is quite normal. Now it would kill me 😆

Up and dressed 5:30am
Gym 6:15am
Train to work 7:30am
Train Home 5:40pm in by 7pm
Relax pre-kids then after it was bedtime routine until 8pm
8pm cook and eat dinner, do a few chores, watch TV
10/10:30am bed

I think this looks pretty reasonable. I do similar but my works hours are 0800-1800 (but flexible as I do morning drop off for nursery), but I have a shorter commute. The 1.5hrs looks quite a long time to get ready in the morning, can you cut something out there?

I get up at 0700, shower, get the toddler ready for nursery and drop off. I work 0830-1830. I start getting dinner ready whilst my husband does bath and bed time. We eat around 2100, catch up, relax, sometimes catch up with a bit of work. Bed around 2300. We have a cleaner, so we don’t need to do any housework, we take it in turns to do washing (only about 3-4 loads a week not everyday).

We’ve been doing this for a year now and it seems to work. Oddly, since having the baby I now get up later than I used too!!

I'd streamline your mornings: i get up at 6.25 and leave at 7.20 having done packed lunched and breakfast for 3 of us.

I'd also stop working extra hours, and cut the gym time. That's just given you half an hour every day, and an hour and a half some days. Would make a big difference.

But, yes, when I do 12-13 hours out of the house more than once a week, I'm tired.

Me too! Might be crying by the dog walk, depending on how cold it was.

OP has only posted twice and explains it in the second post!

"It’s just me and teen DS at home. Dog goes out with a walker for 1.5-2 hours middle of the day before anyone gets up in arms, and DS is home from 3.30"

I don’t understand why you’re up at 5.45. Shower dress feed dog should take 30 min? Maybe 45 if you have an elaborate hair routine or need to make packed lunch.

How old is DS? Can he do the dog walk sometimes, say every other day? Can he do some household stuff?

The 2 hr driving/ day is tiring but depends a lot on what the route is like. If you’re having to fight through traffic and deal with a lot of junctions etc that’s a lot worse than if it’s a nice simple uncrowded drive. Any scope for lift sharing? Or WFH?

It sounds a pretty average working week day surely? The only thing I have raised brie at is how early you get up, I’d rather have everything ready the night before and toll
out of bed into the car in the morning.

If you're an early bird (which it sounds like maybe you are) would it work for you to get ready and out of the house earlier and do the commute before rush hour, if your work will let you flex your hours?

Otherwise, it seems fairly normal a day. I've always had a commute of an hour (it's a fairly standard commute if you live and work in London) and it's much nicer to drive it than be on public transport, especially if you have to change part way through your journey.

My only other comment, as per PPs, is that you could definitely have at least another half hour in bed if you're finding that you're sleep deprived!

The commute would be too much for me. Not so bad if you're sat on a train and can sit back and relax but not concentrating on driving.
Could you work from home at all? Much more doable then.

That is a busy schedule and unless I absolutely had to do it to keep a roof over my head I wouldn't do it.

You have hardly any down time and if you can, I would look for work nearer home.

I feel sorry for you with that routine. 😔

Yes i'd be utterly exhausted.
I'm up at
6am-6.50am Shower and breakfast
6.50am drive 30 mins to drop DS off at the bus
7.30am at my desk working
6pm leave work to collect DS
two nights a week he has a tutor so him at 8pm
Other nights home at 7pm.

I am knackered!

Every day? Yes. Almost certainly. 5.45am is a very early start and it seems like you are non-stop until 8.30pm which is a long day. It depends a bit on how much you enjoy your job and how intense it is. Also on whether it is a nice drive or a stressful drive. I don't like driving personally.

Agree with others. I'd probably get up a bit later. 60 mins should be enough? I intially thought you were walking the dog in the morning so allowed for that.

It's actually fairly similar to my day. I leave house at 7.25, arriving 8.45am at work. But I don't get up until 6.30. And I take the train to work which may make all the difference.

It would exhaust me but I have a chronic health condition.

It sounds like someone young and single who is temporarily working far from home.

Surely no one would choose a 100 miles a day commute long term?

I was shocked when you said you have a child! I've done commuting with DC's but had a DP or cut everything else so spend more time with them.

It's not much of a life for ds or ddog.

That is almost exactly my schedule, including the commuting distance, on the days I go into the office BUT I only do that on Mondays and Thursdays now, so that makes all the difference. I used to do it every day and was exhausted.

So things that helped me, some of which might help you:

• working offset hours so that I miss the worst of the traffic (currently 10-7);
• exercising at home, rather than at gym, usually in the morning, or a short run or Pilates class at lunchtime, and not every day. Exercising in the morning means one shower a day too;
• not working over my hours - the more exhausted you get, the longer you work trying to make up time, the tired you get, the less productive you are, the longer you work, etc. etc.;
• adding some days WFH
• making sure you sometimes have real days off at the weekend, not trying to cram everything you didn't have time for in the week into two days at the weekend

My day doesn't look that much different- I think it's just normal life, very boring most of the time.