Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

What do you drink at the pub if you don’t drink alcohol?

106 replies

Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 08:12

I don’t drink anymore (I’ve had a huge health scare and it’s shocked me into a lot of changes). I don’t really go out anyway as I moved across the country and don’t know anyone, this will be the first time in about 5 years.

I have been invited out by some new friends though.

This will be the first time I’ve gone to a pub and not had alcohol. And I don’t want to make a big deal of it as they are all 10 or so years younger than me (i’m 42, they are all late 20s), we met through our toddlers. Not a massive deal I know but I have had the odd comment from them about being in my 40s and things, and it’s clear they are up for a big night.

So what do you do if you don’t drink? I don’t want to make a big deal of not drinking either. I know one of dh colleagues doesn’t drink, he orders himself a lemonade and pretends there is vodka in it to get round the people who keep going on and on at him to just have one. I always found in the past that if one person doesn’t drink, there is always someone who is like a dog with a bone and won’t leave it.

But equally, I don’t want to sit there with glass after glass of pop that I don’t want just so I have “something”.

And yes, I am overthinking! It’s lovey to have finally met some nice people and I don’t want to cock it up!

OP posts:
Vinorosso74 · 01/12/2022 08:26

There are some decent alcohol free beers and gins if that's an option.
I've cut back on my alcohol intake so don't drink at home and if I go to the pub I have either a pint of lime and soda or orange juice and lemonade as my first drink and judge their reactions. You could do that then switch to stuff that looks like booze.
Alternatively, you could be honest you don't drink, people should respect that, or say you're on medication you can't mix with alcohol.
I get where you coming from but people need to leave those who don't drink alone!

ofwarren · 01/12/2022 08:27

I drink lemonade too

Original poster
Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 08:27

Vinorosso74 · 01/12/2022 08:26

There are some decent alcohol free beers and gins if that's an option.
I've cut back on my alcohol intake so don't drink at home and if I go to the pub I have either a pint of lime and soda or orange juice and lemonade as my first drink and judge their reactions. You could do that then switch to stuff that looks like booze.
Alternatively, you could be honest you don't drink, people should respect that, or say you're on medication you can't mix with alcohol.
I get where you coming from but people need to leave those who don't drink alone!

I’m coeliac as well which makes it harder with alcohol free beers etc! (Not looked but am assuming I can’t have them!)

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General food
Roundandroundthegarden0 · 01/12/2022 08:29

I drink tonic water without the gin, there are some really nice ones available.

EBearhug · 01/12/2022 08:30

I mostly drink water.

greenacrylicpaint · 01/12/2022 08:30

ginger ale
or tonic water

depends on the pub's offering and what I fancy.

TwoRockSalmonAndAHaporthOfChips · 01/12/2022 08:31

I used to have lime and soda, but I can’t have citrus any more, so usually soda or tonic water. It looks like a G&T, if you’re worried about comments. I haven’t drunk for nearly 20 years bar a once a year prosecco, so nobody comments now - I just am a non-drinker.

Original poster
Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 08:38

I think it’s just the pressure to have a drink in front of me as well and to keep finishing the bloody thing.

If I was sat at home, I wouldn’t be drinking in the evenings, I drink all my water earlier in the day.

So it’s just the expectation to be sitting there, constantly drinking something I’m not thirsty for just to look like I am keeping up with something. It’s mad, isn’t it?

Okay, I really am over thinking now. I just don’t want this to turn into an old and boring thing. I’m not. I’m a good laugh and fun to be around!

OP posts:
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia · 01/12/2022 08:43

I've not been for a night out to a pub in years either, & can't drink alcohol due to chronic migraines, but I tend to drink either soda water with a slice of lemon/lime in, or fruit juice if I go somewhere with DH. I can't have caffeine or artificial sweeteners, & I find anything with quinine in makes me feel nauseous (I used to drink gin with orange, grapefruit etc but quickly gave up on tonic water). Sometimes I have tomato juice... I used to like the occasional Bloody Mary.

Either tell them the truth, or let them think there's something extra in it. It's not actually any of their business.

ExperimentalWarper · 01/12/2022 08:44

I usually have fevertree ginger ale if it’s on offer as I don’t find it too sweet. Failing that tonic water or the odd ginger beer depending on what brand it is.

Marshmallowmountain · 01/12/2022 08:45

cola
lemonade
ginger ale
lime and soda
elderflower and soda

Whatevergetsyouthroughthenight · 01/12/2022 08:49

Alcohol free is becoming much more popular, if you are lucky your pub may sell Seedlip, (not to be confused with Sipsmith, which is a gin brand).

Seedlip is a lovely range of alcohol free ‘spirits’. You have it with tonic as a mixer (it’s bloody expensive mind you). I like the Spice and Garden varieties.

Even Gordon’s sell alcohol free tonic now (not tried it ye5 mind you).

RoyKeaneisRight · 01/12/2022 08:49

I usually have sparkling water.
One piece of advice - don't get into rounds!
I always find of I'm not drinking, usually because I'm driving, that you don't drink the same volume as you would when drinking alcohol. So two drinks would probably be enough for me for the night.

ScornedChicken · 01/12/2022 08:54

I drink orange and apple juice, appletiser if they have it, or coke zero/cherry coke zero. If I go to somewhere like tgi's I get a mocktail (expensive but feels like a little treat). Water with ice is refreshing too. I don't drink anymore (doesn't take much to make me argue, get headache, feel generally unwell). Don't miss it.

Original poster
Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 08:55

I know I should just be honest. They are really nice people.

But I have had a couple of off hand comments about being a bit older. Nothing nasty, but I was 26/27 once myself and saw 42 as a lot older, so I do get it. And my eldest is 21 so I’ve had the odd “he should come instead of you!” jokes in the past. Which I know are just jokes, but it makes me think when my son is closer in age to them that I am!

So I don’t want to go in with “I don’t drink” as I am scared that it will make me seem even more “old.” Even though, I’m not.

I have been so lonely over the last few years since we moved, hence the overthinking.

OP posts:
pigsducksandchickens · 01/12/2022 08:57

Roundandroundthegarden0 · 01/12/2022 08:29

I drink tonic water without the gin, there are some really nice ones available.

This! No one needs to know there isn't a gin or vodka in it unless you tell them. I also find it's not the kind of drink you slug down which I would if it was lemonade. Otherwise coke is totally acceptable.

superplumb · 01/12/2022 08:57

Mocktails usually depending on where I am. I've noticed mote pubs are doing them now. Failing like j20, coke

Iluvfriends · 01/12/2022 08:59

I don't drink alcohol as I don't like the taste, neither does my partner. None of our friends pester us to have a drink and we would just say no if the situation did arise.
Don't pretend you have alcohol in your glass, just stick to your guns. No one can force you to drink something you don't want to.
Yes it can be a complete pain having someone go on at you to 'oh have a proper drink', but they'll soon get bored once they know you won't cave in.

SingingSands · 01/12/2022 08:59

Blackcurrant and soda is my go-to at the pub (I don't drink much either).

Also like: ginger beer if they have it, lime and soda, pineapple and lemonade, cranberry juice, orange juice, some posh tonics, coffee.

Once I've had two drinks I don't usually want another (like you say - why keep drinking, I'd be in the loo all night!) I just usually wave my hand and say "I'm good - I'm a cheap round!".

latetothefisting · 01/12/2022 09:07

Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 08:38

I think it’s just the pressure to have a drink in front of me as well and to keep finishing the bloody thing.

If I was sat at home, I wouldn’t be drinking in the evenings, I drink all my water earlier in the day.

So it’s just the expectation to be sitting there, constantly drinking something I’m not thirsty for just to look like I am keeping up with something. It’s mad, isn’t it?

Okay, I really am over thinking now. I just don’t want this to turn into an old and boring thing. I’m not. I’m a good laugh and fun to be around!

This does sound a bit ott sorry. Its buying a coke in a pub, not being waterboarded! Just think of it as a fee to use the pub, it would be rude to sit there for hours and not get anything.

Just get a drink, doesn't matter what. You don't have to constantly drink it or get refills. In fact it might be better to get something you don't like so you just sip on it occasionally and have an excuse not to buy another as you haven't finished your first one.

If you are a good laugh and fun I doubt the others will notice or care how much you are drinking, if they do just say you're on medication or went out for drinks last night too or whatever.

BarrelOfOtters · 01/12/2022 09:14

I usually drink lime and soda if I’m not drinking drinking. I find that once they’ve all had a few pints you can skip rounds and no one notices. So you don’t have to sit their drinking your lemonade or whatever. Have a mock tail if there’s one going.

and also have a think how to get out without drinking too. I moved to a place I knew nobody and said yes to everything, joined a night class, took up tennis, a walking group….haven’t stuck with them alll. I know it’s harder with kids but there’s stuff out there. A bit like dating you’ll have to metaphorically kiss a few frogs but you’ll find your people.

ImHavingAnOldFriendForDinner · 01/12/2022 09:15

Diet Coke or lemonade and pretend it's a vodka or I've given up pretending now and just have lime and soda water!

It seems massively unacceptable to not drink alcohol and people are always really shocked! Drives me mad.

You could always use the old "I'm on antibiotics" tactic and then drink whatever soft drink you like.

Wakk · 01/12/2022 09:16

Don't pretend Confused

Just say you're not drinking at the moment, or say nothing.

I have appletise or lime and soda usually.

Original poster
Footballmyarse · 01/12/2022 09:17

latetothefisting · 01/12/2022 09:07

This does sound a bit ott sorry. Its buying a coke in a pub, not being waterboarded! Just think of it as a fee to use the pub, it would be rude to sit there for hours and not get anything.

Just get a drink, doesn't matter what. You don't have to constantly drink it or get refills. In fact it might be better to get something you don't like so you just sip on it occasionally and have an excuse not to buy another as you haven't finished your first one.

If you are a good laugh and fun I doubt the others will notice or care how much you are drinking, if they do just say you're on medication or went out for drinks last night too or whatever.

Show quote history

I know it is. I’ve just been so bloody lonely and it’s so nice to be invited out after so many years with a group of new people I’ve met over me the last few months. I don’t want to end up looking different for some reason and not be invited again, hence all the angst.

If I was able to go back and visit where I moved from and went out with old friends, I would probably get a coke and not give it a second thought.

OP posts:
CraigDavid · 01/12/2022 09:19

If I'm not drinking I have tonic with a dash of bitters. Yes the bitters are alcoholic but you only use a few drops.