I miss my mum and I'm scared of the future

[BarbaraVineFan]

I'm an only child, in my early forties and my beloved mum died last year. I'm divorced with a little girl and my ex lives abroad, My dad and I are close and we talk every day (although tbh it's not the same as having my mum to talk to, because he isn't all that great at discussing emotional stuff) and I'm starting to really panic about what will happen when he dies.

I'll just be alone in the world, with nobody to look out for me or to whom I am the most important person in their life. It scares me and I just wondered if there's anyone in the same situation, and how you cope? Is there anything I should be doing now to prepare (sorry if that sounds cold, but my dad is 84 now and I'm really starting to think about it.)

I’m in my 40s. I making steps to start thinking about my parents death. I have asked my Mum her funeral plans etc. It’s so sad but also important.
Do you have close friend, hobby’s you enjoy? These are all things that can fill (although never fully) time and keep you occupied.
as your daughter gets older you will become her important person.
Would you consider dating and looking for new love?

Do you have any connection with your extended family? Cousins? Aunts?
Old friends?
You need to start building relationships with people other than your dad.

My Mum died when I was 37 and I have no other family. None. It’s just me and my dc and my dh. I think you need to focus on your dd - they’re your rock now and will be even more so as they get older. And start trying to widen your circles, meet new people, date if that’s something you’d like to do - I met dh online, we’ve been together 11 years now.

I am an only child and have no children. My Mum is 92 and my husband is 70. We would need a very small table for a family reunion!

I do have close friends I can talk to, but they are not physically close and so we don't see each other very often, maybe once or twice a year. I have extended family but they are not very close either emotionally or physically.

Luckily I am lucky enough to love my job as a teacher, and to be very happy at work. I think my job provides me with a lot of emotional connection in some ways, so I'm definitely not lonely on a day to day basis, but I'm just worried about having nobody special.

I would consider dating I guess, but think I might come across as a bit needy because of all the reasons listed above.

I really sympathise OP
My mum is 55 and has recently been diagnosed with terminal cancer and I am utterly terrified of what it will be like when she is no longer here, I do have other family but we aren't close and we only really talk/see each other via my mum... she really is the glue that holds the family together.

So so sorry about the loss of your mum OP. You will not be alone - you have your lovely daughter and your mother-daughter relationship will be special like the one you had with her gran.