Make him get up every time, accept it, or get rid?

[tenderstembroccolispear]

Since Mr Broccoli has been working from home (last two years roughly) he's been staying up later and getting up later. I have to leave the house at 6.30am to get to work, and usually get home around 5.30/6pm.

About a year ago, there was one day I got home and he was still in bed, and he stayed in bed until I got up for work the next morning. I checked on him and he wasn't ill, he just said he wanted to stay in bed and was grumpy that I had woken him up.

Since then, he's had a few more times when he's slept through like this, sometimes spending a whole 24 hours or more in bed. It's becoming more frequent and he's done it once a week since October.

I haven't been waking him up since the first time. I HAVE told him that I really hate it when he does it, because I end up unexpectedly on my own all night, plans get spoiled, etc. He just kind of shrugs it off.

What would you do? Wake him up every time? Or just shrug and enjoy an evening on your own? Or think 'fuck that' and end things?

Also, if you want to get rid, then that’s your choice too. We all make our choices in life. No one can answer that for you.

I'm surprised that everyone's suggesting he's depressed. If he is staying in bed, the whole time then he will be depressed.

Does he work for himself? If not, just his boss know that he's asleep all the time?

Do you have children?

To be honest, I couldn't live like that. I would be incredibly depressed myself just having to put up with him.

I could not stand this, depression or not. You get one life OP.

What's the rest of his daily life look like, OP?

Does he get out of the house? Exercise? Go out with friends?

Is this a big change from pre-pandemic?

If he used to be sociable and outgoing, I would encourage him to seek help.

If he's always been this way inclined, then I think you have to decide what's best for you.

I guess they are saying it because staying in bed excessively can be a symptom of depression.

That kind of fatigue obviously isn’t normal. I’d honestly be concerned that he was either depressed or ill.

Yes. I'm surprised that your OP doesn't even consider either of those things. Especially when he's on ADs already. It sounds as though the depression has taken a turn for the worse, and he needs to get to the doctors, pronto.

Is he sleeping or lazing around on his phone/reading/watching telly?

If he's sleeping I'd be sending him to the GP, it's not normal to sleep 24hrs once a week. Maybe once in a blue moon if you're poorly, but not because you just 'can'

He sounds depressed to me, maybe try and get him to see his GP

Working from home definitely had an impact . I got like this . Just never left my bed , I've recently been compelled to go back in to the office 3 days a week and although I've already picked up a nasty cold , I am more in a routine and feel a little happier to be seeing people .
I think if you are depressed it's easy to veg at home . I became almost nocturnal .