Sense of impending doom/dissociating on a busy train

[inablindpanic]

Been out all day with friend, had a v difficult/deep conversation but I’m left shattered and with a horrible sense of impending doom like Ive never had before . I’m on train home and keep feeling something horrible is going tk happwn. I’ve got an hour and twenty minthes yet . Don’t know what to do . Am disorientated as facing backwards and jr being so dark outside too .

I realise I'm late here, and haven't read all of your replies yet which I will and am hoping you're feeling better. My first ever panic attack was on a train and like you I was worried about standing up to get off the train at my stop as I felt I'd just collapse and when I did get up, everything was okay but my legs did feel like jelly. What helps me is running my hands under freezing cold water if I can, slow deep breaths and doing the 5 things I can see, hear etc. or pinching myself and concentrating on that feeling.

Glad you’re home. Have a hot drink, a snack and get cosy in bed. Hope you have a good nights sleep.

Hello OP. I really hope you are feeling better. It’s so comforting to know that posters were here to help you through it. I’m frequently in awe of the time and kindness on here, but also posters who reach out for help.

I only learned on MN that a feeling of doom could be a sign of being unwell (I know you had a difficult conversation). Keep an eye out. Be well.

So pleased to hear you're home

Sending you hugs and wishing you a good sleep

FYI to lovely posters who, I know are only trying to help, but - telling someone with anxiety who is clearly having a panic attack that a sense of impending doom is a sign of imminent health crisis is probably the least helpful thing you can do and is absolutely guaranteed to make the panic attack worse!

Very glad you are feeling better OP. Get a good night's sleep.

Hope you're feeling better now OP.

Still a bit spaced out and strange but not as bad as I was on the train .

It was childhood stuff we were talking about, abuse in childhood, and helps to talk about it but it brings it back to front of your mind and it’s hard not to panic . Felt like it was happening to me right now not many years ago . Then because I felt so scared it was like brain decided to switch off which meant I was doing stuff on autopilot and not fully realising . Horrible, horrible feeling .

I'm so glad that the train and station staff were so understanding and helpful. I want to give them a hug on your behalf after reading this thread. It's so reassuring to know that they can deal with this kind of thing sensitively.

Well done for getting through this. You've done really well.

Please see your gp soon and get checked out. I once felt like this and went to see my gp who said my blood pressure was very high 200/110!

Wow! Glad you had that checked.

How amazing everyone was to OP

I’ll phone my GP at 8 . I had a very similar episode speaking to same friend a couple of years ago that I was told was due to underlying trauma or something . I still don’t feel 100% right this morning, I’ve got access to crisis team for much worse MH but don’t want to go down that route unless I really have to . I did sleep last night at least, might try and get another 2-3 hours .

And yes, you’re all absolutely wonderful couldnt be mkre thankful to you all 💕🥰

Just wanted to say thanks for thks @Magicshoppingtrolley . I get panic attacks too and always try to fight them. Have never thought of literally thinking "Bring it on" but I think that would really help me! Hope you're feeling so much better now it's all passed OP x

You are describing the symptoms of PTSD. A trauma trained therapist can help. Make sure you tell the doctor what you were talking about - hopefully they can point you in the right direction. Much love - you are very brave. x

Op going forward consider explaining to your friends that you simply can not have those kinds of conversations when you are away from home, and it is not safe for you to do so. Having some boundaries around what you are prepared to say, and prioritising your safety and well being is absolutely paramount in the future.

I also think this can be treated, so I would look into that op/

Do you take propranolol regularly? It can cause some weird symptoms. Talk to your GP about it.

Thank you, yes PTSD been said before . I’ve been told crisis team phone number before so rang then at 12 and they said duty nurse would ring me back asap .

It’s difficult, I wouldn’t discuss those things with anyone other than my friend at all but it’s so hard to have it all brought back to the front of your mind .

thank you

Still in much the same boat, GP rang late yesterday afternoon and said its just a prolonged episode of dissociating, triggered by conversation with friend, but seem to be stuck in a bit of a loop of it . Crisis team eventually rang me back this afternoon and said someone's going to ring me daily for a few days, but I'm also on the list for community mental health support anyway . They're also seeing if my GP can prescribe me short term diazepam or something . I've had a horrendous episode like this before that was exactly the same trigger, same sort of conversation - diazepam stopped that one . Its very difficult because I know some things need to be talked about but its so hard .

Hi OP. I'm sorry you are having such a bad time, I have been there and I empathise. You need care and lots of self-kindness now to stabilise. And when you are feeling a little bit less close to the edge, think about engaging a good trauma-focused therapist. If you can afford it, it is massively worth the investment. If not, there are lots of charities that specialise in this sort of thing. It's terrifying but it can get better, I promise. ❤️

There's an excellent book on this called 'The Body Keeps the Score'. It has literally changed my life. Give it a read when you are feeling up to it.