Will I realistically be able to move with a one year old? Is it selfish?

[wprrier11]

Just that really. Lone parent, hate where we live, feel very alone. Im being told not to uproot dc just because I want to be somewhere busier or because I want more work opportunity etc. I feel selfish. Has anyone done this?

We moved with a one year old better to do it before they are at school etc

You’re 1 year old won’t even notice I promise! We work abroad and have been back / forth every few months. It’s only when my toddler hit 2 ish she’s just started to notice

I literally don't see a problem at all with moving.

Can you explain why you're worried about this?

Thanks. I feel so mean as I only want to move to feel more like ‘me.’ I want to be in a busier place and have better work etc. It does feel like I’m taking them away from lonely countryside though

How is it selfish? I don’t really understand why people think that. A one year old really just needs the stability parent/s give.

are you moving away from a good support network?

if you are happier overall and more opportunities for work I could only see it benefitting your child.

@SliceOfCakeCupOfTea i want to be somewhere busier but now we have walks on tap, greasy country air, closer to family. I’m just bored and lonely and want to be somewhere busier but feel so guilty.

It literally wouldn’t cross my mind to feel guilty about something like that.

As long as a 1 yr old has you to love them, a warm Dry place to sleep and enough food and a few toys-they are grand.

What they do need more then anything is a happy mum. To be the best parent you can be you need to do what you need to do.

Don't picture it as paradise. Even somewhere busier it takes time and effort to built a social circle. It wont automatically make everything better. But it might mean that they are in a year. Be realistic. If its still worth it then go for it.

I agonised over moving a 3 yr old once. That night he had his cot and his teddies and simply laid down and said night night totally unphased. And woke up the next
Morning shouting for me happily like normal.

Even if they are unsettled it would likely only last a day or two.

I moved for work when my DS was very nearly two. He doesn't even remember his home from before. This city is his home.

If you live in the countryside I am sure it is pretty and lovely for now. But I often wonder what happens when children are teenagers and want stuff to do. Our city has many faults but my DS could independently go into town, go to the cinema, go swimming with his friends.

If it doesn't work out you can always consider going back.

My parents moved when I was one. I can't remember a thing about it.

Long term your DC will be much happier if you are. Also, wanting more or better job opportunities isn't being selfish especially at the moment and not knowing when things will improve. Also, a busier area will give DC better opportunities, ie more choice of childcare so you can Puck which one suits them best. Moving forward more local clubs andchoice of friends.

How much uprooting can it be for a 1 year old?! It's not like you are taking them away from school. OP I think you are overthinking this