How do you shake off 'scenes of a distressing nature'

[holidayhonesty]

I am usually pretty blasé about those warnings they give at the start of tv show saying that it contains scenes of a distressing nature, but yesterday I watched something that has really stuck with me and left me feeling on edge. I actually had a 'nightmare' about it last night and was awake for ages in the night thinking about it. Today I've been on edge being home alone whereas normally I love being in the house by myself.

So if you find things stick with you, how do you shake them off or put them to the back of your mind?

This happens to me sometimes without any warning whatsoever. The Daily Fail App (yeah, I know 🤫) never gives any warning of very distressing Child abuse or animal cruelty stories. Same with my Google feed, it's just right there with full photo and content.
Yesterday when it happened I came straight to Mumsnet and scrolled like mad through the most mundane of topics 😁 Or I will switch the TV on and watch an episode of friends. Safe, comforting and there is always a rerun on the go.

It's awful OP, I know exactly what you mean x

Ah thank you for your reply @Justleaveitblankthen - yes I've been scrolling on here all day (should have been working) and did watch some comforting nonsense on TV to try and distract myself too. I am sure it will pass but it is horrible.

Was it a ‘real’ show ? As in I watch a detective show that has distressing/graphic scenes but I can move on from it because I know it’s just make up - similarly I find YouTubing the ‘how it’s done on ‘tv show’ is an easy way for me to move on from something… less useful in real world scenarios but just a thought

Sorry you have this, OP.

I find that if I'm disturbed by something, if it lessens over time.

I try to watch comedies and fun programmes in the meantime.

If it’s a horrible scene from a tv show or movie, I imagine the director calling ‘end scene!’ and the actors getting up, laughing, going for a coffee. I change the colours in my mind to something more cheerful and deliberately ‘shrink the screen’ of the memory so it’s smaller. I do it again and again each time it crops up and disturbs me until it doesn’t get an adrenaline reaction.

I hear you OP!

I find that warnings at the beginning of tv shows don't give enough detail for me to have any idea if I'll be affected by it or not so I go on doesthedogdie.com to search for the specific thing that bothers me, do you use it? Although I have missed a couple of incidences that weren't listed there (I later added them) it's a good way of getting a look at what sort of content might appear because I still enjoy some shows that contain violence etc., there's just a specific kind of content I need to avoid

Distraction and time.
Stick to some funny or feel good tv or socialise with friends/ family if you can and generally I find that after some time these things mellow in your mind.

I think you just have to keep going with your normal routine and distract yourself, when the distressing image/s come up treat them like intrusive thoughts so don't fight it but just leave it be and keep going with what you are doing. Do a few relaxation techniques as well if you are feeling a bit panicky when they pop up; so square breathing, fresh air and whatever relaxes you. It'll pass.

These are the techniques I use as some violent/disturbing things pop up randomly in my head from my childhood and leave me distressed for a few days, I also use it for things like seeing awful stuff in the news etc by accident that bothers me.

Hope you feel better soon.

I watched the Cabinet of Curiosities show on Netflix recently. Had to stop after one of them, I've never felt so disturbed and upset and I usually enjoy horror, but it was absolutely awful.
I had nightmares that night, and actually had a few days afterwards where I felt really "off" and it took a lot of effort to stop thinking about it. I just watched a lot of stuff I find comforting and happy, and did do some comfort eating too. Got some exercise, spent some time with my family. It's funny what can affect you when you least expect it.

I tend to be very careful as things stick with me a long time (there's a scene from Ghost when I saw it in the cinema when it was first out that still occasionally pops into my head unwanted at bad times) and close my eyes as soon as things are getting violent.

What I find most successful in the immediate term is reading a familiar cosy sort of book.

I’m careful, too, as am easily upset/shocked, and can’t watch or read anything remotely violent or frightening, and it stays with me. I read Jane Austen if I’ve accidentally seen something upsetting.

I’d love to know the answer to this. I used to have the news on all day. I’ve now not watched it since about 2 weeks into the Ukraine war started when I watched an 18 month old baby getting blown up on tv. I also didn’t sleep for 3 days after giving birth to dc2, not due to the birth or because she was crying, but because that was when the case of the mum microwaving her newborn to death happened and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I think if people want to protect their mental health, they need to avoid the news

I find it so hard to get rid of images of animal or child cruelty. I'd love to know how to get rid of them because they literally haunt me.

Time and each time it pops into your brain, forcibly shoving it out the way to think of and concentrate on something nice.

The two hardest things I have is a greyhound cruelty video and a photo of a girl who has been run over. one appeared in a news article and one was on someone’s Pinterest when I was looking at crochet patterns.

Difficult for awhile to get it out of my head but over time it’s better and easier to replace with nice things.

In a way though seeing the Greyhound being abused so savagely has made me donate even more to helping them so I suppose that’s positive to focus on.

Things don't tend to stick with me much but if they do I just remind myself that it's completely made up, the people involved washed off the make up, went home, had their tea and went to bed.

I can’t - they stay with me for ages so I tend not to read those news stories. I read one a few days ago which didn’t come with a warning but it was about a 15 year old who’d died in awful circumstances - he was the same age as my youngest DC, even looked like him, and it’s haunted me ever since. I wish I knew how to stop these thoughts from coming into my head - I try and think about other things, but they still pop in ☹️

To be honest I don't have to because nothing I see on TV is as bad as the stuff I deal with at work everyday, I've become hardened to it over the last fifteen years or so, because otherwise I'd probably have a breakdown. It's probably not healthy at all.

The UK news is tame compared with other countries - eg in Spain dead bodies will be shown without warning. I think in some ways it’s good to be shown the real world and not a sanitized version of events. Traumatizing, but all the more so for those directly involved. Maybe more would be done if people were made to confront reality?

I'm usually not phased by stuff on tv because work was worse. But there was one scene in This is Going to Hurt that propelled me into a full on PTSD style flash back to something that happened at work a very long time ago. I used my usual coping strategy of eating half my body weight in chocolate. I didn't say it was a healthy coping strategy.

I read a study about aftercare for soldiers suffering from PTSD and it suggested playing Tetris! It works too, I've tried it after witnessing some horrific stuff that I stumbled across on Reddit.

The advice is to play it as soon as possible after witnessing the event, for as long as possible and repeat for several days after. It works by interrupting the brains ability to lay down long term memories and disrupts the pathways before they properly form.

It sounds barmy but it really does help. My daughter got really scared after watching a horror movie clip on YouTube, she hates Tetris but I made her play it when she couldn't sleep and it settled her again. (Yes her internet access is controlled but things can slip through the net and we had a good talk about her responsibily in that)

www.psych.ox.ac.uk/news/tetris-used-to-prevent-post-traumatic-stress-symptoms

Here's the evidence about Tetris to prove I'm not mad! I'm not sure I remembered all the details correctly but you can read for yourself.

Oh I carry distressing images with me for years. Am absolutely useless at forgetting anything upsetting or difficult. So I’ve no advice, sorry.

Unfortunately sometimes it just takes time, and as others have said I watch a lot of comedies or travel vlogs and stuff to take my mind off it. I also very much listen to my body when watching something (I don’t know how much of a warning you got) but if I start to get that ‘funny feeling’ I will just turn something off or stop scrolling straight away.

Also and this one might sound a bit mental too, but just telling yourself that it’s ok and there’s nothing you can do about it (even if it’s been real). Like relinquishing any guilt you feel over viewing it too.

Hey I watched this recently too and mostly loved it, can I ask which bit bothered you?

Also this may sound silly but try the alphabet game if you're stuck awake and can't drop off without thinking about the horrible stuff. Pick a nice topic that you enjoy (mine is Minecraft or cooking) and then think of something within that topic that begins with each letter of the alphabet. It's a good diversion away from intrusive thoughts when you get stuck on a loop.