Anyone else?
two dc,
DS from previous relationship. He has my mum, my mums mum, his dads mum, he also used to have great grandma on his dads side but she sadly passed away, he also has my partners mum who treats him as her own grandchild.
I have dd with Dp, she has my mum, mt mums mum and partners mum.
but my god. It's like they all compete. None really see each other or anything!
i very rarely post anything on social media. earlier I posted a new rare photo of DS on social media and they all comment about how much they love DS despite they they don't see him in person much. Similar with Dd but she hasn't got so many grandmas 😅
funny enough they talk about their grandchildren a lot on fb but don't make much of an effort in person. Me and Dp always have our kids, which we don't begrudge but not own us has offered to babysit and we haven't had an evening to ourselves in about 8 years.
dp will sometimes take kids over to his mums on a Sunday afternoon to give me a break, my mum founds out she gets jealous and turns her nose up. My mum is always 'busy' though and makes organising to see her complicated and lives furthest away. Mil is similar if we see my mum. The least problematic is my ex's mum and my Grandma/great grandma.
my kids love all their grandmas. Don't favour one over the other but they seem to get jealous over each other. Buy they so mil more often because she lives so close and Dp is really close to his mum, whereas I'm not so much with mine and she's further afield and is always 'busy'.
all have asked the kdis what other grandma has bought them for Christmas/birthdays and will be like well Got you this and it's better. Always a competition.
my mum doesn't buy me anything for Christmas but mil does, I don't tell my mum unless she asks me which she does every year. She seems to have an issue with mil buying me something but doesn't buy me anything herself - money is not the issue here! I have no problem with my mum not buying me anything but she can't get funny when mil does.
when I was having Dd, both my mother and mil were 'playing up' requesting they met Dd 'first' leaving me a very stressed pregnant lady!
birthdays are a problem cos both my mother and mil won't come over at the same time.
I think the issue is with both my mum and mil is that they only had their parents around when they were bringing up their kids, both aren't used to having two families in the picture (or more in our case) as mine and dp's mothers were estranged from their in laws. I find it mentally exhausting keeping everyone happy at Christmas etc! So much so we stay home at Christmas.
is this normal?? Surely not?