What next?! Advice much appreciated!!

[WitheringTights000]

Hi all,

Long time lurker! Could really use some advice as I'm at a crossroads in life!

I come from and live in a small place ( not mainland UK) ...and feel I just can't stay here anymore!

Developed various health issues in my early 20's which I'm still battling (30 now) ...so have definitely missed out on a lot in life. People who I went to school/uni with moved away after/went travelling and I did loose touch with people! The people who are left here that I know are very settled in relationships/have had babies recently etc/expanding their family....so I'm always at a loose end at the weekend. They don't want to go out/have family plans which I get.

I work fully remotely but need to due to my health condition, it can be isolating though. Most of my team is in the US also, so not like we can meet up outside of work.

I just don't know what to do next in my life. I know I need to leave here...my family have suggested that I go travelling which is a good idea, I have a friend to visit in New Zealand, so would do Australia first and would also do some places in the states first....however once that is over I guess I would still be in the same situation of coming back to this small place, no one to hang out with here etc!

The idea of travelling seems great but on the other hand I also think I can push the travelling back a little and it's more important to establish a base somewhere new..... I want to live somewhere where people are in the same boat, in their 30's, single and have time to hang out etc...so settle somewhere I can be happier and be in a better situation!

Does anyone have any suggestions for good places to move to at this age/single and in this situation?

I will need to continue to work remotely and also live by myself due to my health issues!

I'm not a super confident person either or exactly life and soul of the party/a big personality...so I do better with one on one friendships or small groups! So I guess I also wonder if I have the right personality to move away.....but I am literally dying of boredom here at home!

So what would you do?? Go travelling, have a lovely holiday and great experiences, but come home to the same, or focus on setting up base somewhere I can meet new people etc

Would love some advice!/stories of others experiences!/ideas of where to move!

Thanks in advance

Bumping for the early morning crew who can't sleep like me 🥴😆

The good things about travelling are not just seeing new places, but expanding horizons, experiencing new situations, learning to adapt and meeting new people. All of that will inform what you decide to go on to do next. I would 100% do that first - you may well find it brings clarity about who/what/when/where comes next.

Additionally, surely a shame to pick a new place, make an effort to meet people and then bob off for a long trip. The other way round far preferable.

You don't have to go back to the same place? I'm going to assume for now you live somewhere like IoM or Shetland, you don't need to go back there you could settle anywhere after travelling, your job is remote.

IME once you travel you will have itchy feet, time to think about where you could settle instead when you come back?

You could travel and work at the same time staying in places with other 'digital nomads' through a scheme like Outsite. www.outsite.co

You could then live and work and meet people from all over the world in the same boat and then see where it takes you.
You are in a very lucky position and can go off and have some amazing adventures.
Focus on what you have got and what opportunities you have rather than on what you don't have.

Move to London…..

@Lulu2171 thanks for your reply. I guess I'm worried about finances! Ideally I would love to travel first and then move somewhere new, but I think by the time I travel I then wouldn't have money to set up somewhere new!

@AriettyHomily - I'm in N.I. Staying with parents at the moment so sort of thought I wouldn't be able to finance travelling, then getting a new place elsewhere! I would most likely have itchy feet yes, so would probably feel even more unsettled having to come home.

@Mingusthebrave - that looks amazing!! I would love to do something like that...however in terms of my job....most of our team are US, but those of us in the UK must reside in the UK. A few other of my UK team members have to go into the office a few days a week. I only don't have to due up my Health, I did a Health assessment before I started and they recommended permanent WFH. I doubt they would allow me to work from abroad.

@GenerallyGreenerGrass - I would love to live in London...Health condition is bladder related though...I have constant trips to the loo...so would need to live alone....I don't think I could afford to live alone in London ☹️.....would it be doable at all do you know?

You dont have to go abroad to travel....do some UK city hopping while working? Find your travel feet.

What may attract you to London, is available in many other Cities and much much cheaper! I have lived in 7 different cities and I found Cardiff probably the friendliest! ( subjective - obvs ) but you are in such in incredibly lucky position, go make the most of it!

You will meet so many different people, from everywhere in the world, just doing their thing too. And reducing isolation is SO much easier, because there is so EVERYTHING on your doorstep!

I wish you lots and lots of good luck on your journey 🙂

@Gemmanorthdevon - yea that's very true!

I guess the advantage of the other place that another pp sent a link to is it's sort of a community of people in the same boat etc!

Where I am in the UK it's very hard to get shorter term leases! Did you just use air bnb? What other cities have you lived in etc that would be multicultural etc?

I do love London so much! But the prices are just crazy!

Bumping to find out if anyone here has any experience of living solo in London, ie, not with a flatmate, is it in any way affordable?!

I have looked it up and get different results each time!