Feel so down about stretch marks/dating again - how to get over it?

[Celia24]

I gained a stone during lockdown, going from 12-14 to 14-16 and that was enough to cover my lower stomach in stretch marks. Bizarrely one size has faded and the other side is still very red/purple. I have a great bum & chest but god I want to cry when I look at my stomach.

I felt this way about a year ago then started dating a guy. First time we got intimate he said 'hello tiger' and while that might sound cute I hated the fact he mentioned it! He was beautiful looking but really just a fling and now I'd like to find a serious relationship

I've met someone I quite like and now my mind is back to this again.

What can I do to 1) feel better/grow confidence to be in bed with a man again and 2) can I cover the marks up with any kind of product or reduce them

A decent man who is truly interested in you, who cares about you, won't give a single fuck, I assure you.

@Aquamarine1029 thanks.

I just feel so low about it. Even this guy I like just now i can't even imagine building my confidence enough to get to the point of feeling I can take my clothes off.

Channel your inner Shirley valentine, where her chap kisses her stretch marks.

I need to rewatch that @123rd!

When I worried about this before all my worried were dissolved when we started sleeping together. It's only now that I have to face putting myself out there again that it's a scary prospect.

Is there such a thing as stretch make make up!?

I've been watching Send Nudes on C4. It's about people with self-perceived faults who would like to know how to change them and see what they might look like afterwards. It also shows what other people think of them. One of the participants was worried about stretchmarks. Makeup was one option. The program is here if you want to take a look.

www.channel4.com/programmes/send-nudes-body-sos/on-demand/72463-010

Thanks for sending @TheNestedIf - I watched that part. My stretch marks are actually worse than hers because loads still in the red/purple stage but very similar shape.

Laser sounds like an option albeit an expensive one.

I used to be so body confident. I actually like my figure overall but it's the first time I've hated something on my body. It's like a mental block to dating which I want to do again soon. Just don't know how to get over that hurdle.

*by similar shape I meant the stretch marks

I can’t speak for most men but in my personal experience it’s confidence and enthusiasm that is the biggest turn on.

By the time you’ve got to the stage where you are going to be intimate you should at least have reached a good level of friendship, understanding, respect for one another and care about each other.

Stretch marks, spots, scars etc are part of the person you have fallen for and they really do not matter.

Casual relationships and one night stands are more likely to garner unfavourable opinion and remarks as the lust is based on physical appearance.

If you want to improve the look of your skin you could add a couple of tanning drops to your body lotion or use a gradual tanning body lotion - don’t overdo it, just a couple of times a week if your skin is fair and so that it doesn’t look like fake tan but just evens out skin tone etc.

No one but you should be able to tell you’ve used a product.

If you are otherwise presentable no man cares about stretch marks.