OMG. £110 pp quote for a wedding.

[romanceit]

What sort of madness is this?! Yes it is a hotel package but I've been to two or three weddings in this hotel and it's certainly not a particularly high end one.

Living in sin it is!

If you want to cut numbers have it on a Thursday.

A few years ago but some friends of ours somehow found out that the venue the wanted did cheaper packages for a party than wedding. So they told them it was a party! They didn’t know it was a wedding until the bridge and from turned up….!

I got married on a beach in the South Pacific.

Hotel weddings are so dull. Food is lukewarm and not up to much, room is always bland. I would only go to a wedding at a hotel under duress

Also don't be so bloody rude to people making suggestions and trying to help you. It's just snobbery. And if your longed for wedding venue is a hotel then that is quite frankly laughable and shows a complete lack of imagination.

HTH

Oh gosh sorry for typos trying to feed an octopus. *bride and groom

Thing is op, eating out is expensive. Three courses and three drinks at Pizza Exoress (hardly high end) would cost £50 pp. So a meal and drinks at a nice restaurant would be a good deal more. On top of that the hotel is setting up and providing a room for the whole day. Does that figure also include the ceremony and decoration?

150 ppl is surely a very big wedding so it won’t be cheap. If 16500 is too much, then cut numbers, look for a weekday in February, or do something else.

I was evening guest (never again) at a wedding where they had ceremony, speeches, afternoon tea, evening guests arrive, barbecue and band. They could easily have ditched the tea, had us all there at 4pm (was summer) and just had the barbie. Presume would have been a lot cheaper, and nicer, as when I got there everyone was hammered from drinking with barely any food! Can you ask the hotel if there is some flex like that? Or a pay bar all night?

I think that's not a bad price really for the lack of hassle. You get what you pay for.

We did the opposite. Took 12 weeks to plan. Hired a lovely local village hall (beams and fairy lights) with grounds for £150, did the reg office quietly then a massive party. The street food van (not a chip van, much more upmarket) was about £2k for 90 ish heads. Pulled pork, halloumi burgers, various fries, dips and coleslaw. We bought wine, beer, cider, Prosecco and mixers and provided a free bar - with a note to say bring spirits if you have a fancy drink in mind, and did a dessert / salad / cheese / nibbles table. Sweets for the kids. Candles, fairy lights and jam jars on the tables. Hired an amp and did a Spotify playlist. Homemade fudge favours, paper lace over everything ugly.

Ended up about 100 people. I had oodles of booze left, no one was hungry, everyone ate, danced and had a fab time. Around £5k for absolutely everything, incl cake, flowers, outfits and everything.

My favourite bit about threads like these are the people who say "everyone is still talking about how my wedding is the best they've ever been to" about their own probably naff wedding. Because most weddings are naff.

OP, that price does sound about right for a hotel wedding. You have to weigh up the convenience vs the cost.

So you want: 150 guests, 3 course sit down meal, all organised for you, band/dj, drinks on arrival and a wedding reception all for less than £15,000? OP you're dreaming.

You reduce numbers without offending people by saying "there's a limit on numbers".

Just invite the people you actually talk to.
You don't need to invite cousins or the weird uncle nobody ever sees apart from at weddings and funerals.

You don't need to invite your friends that you haven't seen in 15 years but still write happy birthday on your Facebook wall.

You don't need to invite anyone who you wouldn't miss.

The problem is you want everything but don’t have the budget for it or don’t want to pay that for it.

You want a big proper celebration, lots of guests, a 3 course meal, plenty of booze, want it made as easy as possible for you, band/dj etc.

You have to compromise somewhere. Out of wedding season is a good shout. But you will need to make other compromisesZ

I do think weddings take the piss a bit. But you want the venue to provide staff, all the food, drink, the space and do a lot of the legwork. And they need to make a profit, or what’s the point?

Looking down on how other people have had weddings, just makes you look like a dick. You version of ‘a proper celebration’ isn’t everyone else’s. It’s not better or worse. It’s just different.

This sounds great!

Oh give over. Wanting a wedding and wanting to be married are synonymous for most people but not for everyone. You want to be married and you want a certain type of wedding. That’s absolutely fine. PP made suggestions in good faith to tell you how they saved money when they realised they couldn’t afford a certain type of wedding. Your response was bitchy snobbery. You won’t be any more married than they are when you finally get around to it.

Or get married abroad so hardly anyone can come!

Whereabouts in the country are you? I got married in a hotel in the north west in June and it was £45pp. Pretty standard package. Not the highest end hotel.

Have you considered booking out a restaurant? My friend did that and it was cheaper. She still had the traditional setup. Speeches, DJ etc. Just slept elsewhere!

Several couples that I know have just gone abroad to get married. No headache, and a lovely holiday as well.

We're older but got married in September this year. Register office wedding with immediate family (about 20 of us), then meal at gastro style pub for immediate family. Large party in evening for remaining friends and family, with free bar and pizzas.

Total cost including flowers, photographer etc etc was circa £5,000. You really just have to decide what your budget is, what's important to you and then cut your cloth accordingly.

Perhaps see if they do a twilight wedding option too? That can save money because you go straight from wedding to party and you can have a hot buffet or alternative.

I think that pretty reasonable and you'll be lucky to find anywhere much cheaper!
I know that ours is £220 per person and includes 1 champagne, half a bottle of wine pp, toasting champagne, 5 course dinner, canapés, evening buffet and the venue.

God, how many guests are you having for £220 per person?!

We paid £175pp, had 120 people.

3 course meal, champagne top table, wine with meal and champagne toasts.

plus a few other bits.

That was just the venue, with everything Church, Car, horse and carriage, evening food etc, the total was around £35k

@RH1234 did you ever regret spending that amount of money on what is essentially a party

I’m not one for regrets.
If anything, I wouldn’t have invited one person, as they didn’t show, so that was a waste.

Yes, it’s a party, but it was a really wonderful day. Looking back, and the thing I tell anyone getting married, the best part of the entire was getting married in the Church (and we’re not religious).

We're having 70 guests! To be honest I would prefer to pay for quality and personally I know that the food is usually what I remember from a wedding!