Those of you that have overcome anxiety…

[Sfuandtired]

How did you achieve it? I’m driving myself crazy with my constant overthinking, catastrophising and generally stressing myself out completely.

I have been taking Fluoxetine which definitely helps but not as much as it used to, I wonder if the fact I’m peri menopausal is a factor there, any tips gratefully received. TIA

I had a breakdown, I was put on sertiline (sp?) I felt worse so came off it after a week. (Apparently it gets better if you can wait it out) I decided not to do the medication route, I did the following-

Made changes at home- dh doing more, asking for more support from family, me changing work to a less stressful job (although we were not better financially our quality of life improved)
CBT - through NHS (the wait list was about 2 month at the time) I had about 4m of fortnightly sessions
Mindfulness course - I did this through NHS too , 6 week course teaching meditation /mindfulness
Hypnotherapy- not cheap but at £60 a month it really helped calm those anxious thoughts
Walking - nature helps regulate
Yoga - I used yoga with Adrienne at home and joined a weekly class
Meditation- I joined a local group
Calm app - free for first week then limited content unless you sign up which is £35 for the year.

I also had some reiki which was relaxing although I didn't feel it helped with anxiety particularly.

I got into a fairly strict routine of meditating 3x a day and doing yoga at least once a day. It took time but I learnt to calm and be aware of the anxious thoughts which caused my anxiety. It's five years on now and I would say I'm a far less anxious person and my anxiety doesn't frighten me anymore. . I don't meditate every day now but do if I feel I need it. I still do yoga/walking/meditation group

I no longer listen to the news and apart from Mumsnet I'm not on any social media whatsoever. I can't believe what a difference it has made. And citalopram.

Place marking for the morning

I have been on meds a few times in the past. When my anxiety went through the roof about two years ago I decided I did not want to take the drugs because I knew I’d be scared to ever come off them, and I also knew I needed to try to address root causes. HRT helped but I still had very bad patches. So I really zeroed in on nutrition. I eat for my gut health these days, with as wide a range of different plants as I can manage. I cut out refined seed oils entirely (game changer in my opinion) and I supplement with omega 3, vitamin B and magnesium. I also keep my glucose levels stable by following some very simple tips in the book The Glucose Revolution. I did a meditation course and meditated regularly, I have always exercised and kept fit so that didn’t change, and I had already given up alcohol two years before the anxiety went through the roof, so I put my vast improvement down to nutrition. I am very focused on it for my kids as well and my teenage daughter’s state of mind has definitely improved.

@StandUpStraight Can I ask what refined seed oils are please? Do you mean sunflower oil and rapeseed oil for cooking? Are they known to affect anxiety?

Things which have helped me in the past:

Reducing caffeine. When I'm really really tired in the morning, I'll have one coffee. Ideally I'd prefer to not have any at all. Tea has caffeine too (though not as much as coffee), so I've switched to peppermint tea now when I'm having a sandwich or whatever.

Exercise. Something really really strenuous works for me. Particularly boxing/box-fit classes. A half hour high intensity workout really calms me down. I think that your body relaxes naturally after a tough workout which in turn relaxes your mind.
Yoga and pilates also work for me but for different reasons I suspect. When you're concentrating on something, such as holding a pose, it seems to focus the mind onto something other than worrying.

Routine. Having a routine seems to reassure me.

Tidy home. When my house is cluttered and untidy (such as right now), I feel constantly stressed as everywhere I look, I see something that needs to be done.

Headphones when leaving my house. Music or a funny podcast or watching a film I've downloaded etc. This is particularly useful for me as I use public transport a lot.

Sunglasses! This is again in relation to leaving my house. It makes me feel less visible lol. This is purely psychological for me, but I tend to feel everyone is looking at me, so it's a weird comfort to me, as I feel like if like it gives me a sort of invisibility cloak 😎This is possibly unique to me though and my particular craziness haha.

Water. Two ways this helps. Being in water (shower) or being beside water (lake, beach, river). I don't know why it soothes me, but it does. I don't like baths personally as I don't like sitting/lying doing nothing in the bath listening to my own incessant internal rantings haha, but I love the sensation of water over my head in the shower.

Not rushing. I have a tendency to struggle to be on time so end up rushing and racing to try to get places which panics me so it works for me to be organised so that I'm not going to end up worrying about being late. When I don't have anywhere I need to be, I find consciously slowing down my pace also helps me. I have noticed that I always seem to be rushing around even when I've no need to be. Taking my time can calm me. This one also ties in with the tidy home as if it's organised, it takes less time to get ready to go somewhere and the tidying in itself can be therapeutic to me.

Fragrance. This used to help me before I lost most of my sense of smell - in particular I found the lavender yankee candles used to make me drowsy. I also used to use a couple of drops of lavender essential oil in an oil burner, but for some reason it didn't have the same effect as the yankee candles strangely. Now I can't smell them. 🙄 Other nice scents. Even a nice perfume can soothe me. Aromatherapy á la QwithaC....

Looking well. This is again probably peculiar to me, but I don't feel as noticeable if I look half-decent. If I look like something the cat dragged in, I get paranoid in public.

Not arguing. I seem to spend an awful lot of my time arguing. Arguing with doctors, arguing on here, arguing with services, arguing with my big toe basically. I rarely win and it does me absolutely NO GOOD whatsoever. Do I learn? No!

Not engaging in social media all the time. That seems to waste my time and raise my heart rate lol.

Having lists of things to do. I spend an inordinate amount of time procrastinating and then consequently prolonging the agony. Then, actually doing the things on the list is useful 😆

B vitamins seem to help me. I'm also prescribed a tiny dose of Diazepam but just knowing I have them with me can relax me. I'm also on an antidepressant. I've previously been on propranolol too.

Reducing alcohol. It gives me jitters the next day. It also makes me look like shit (see above re looking good), and makes me tired (see above re caffeine then being required) and I think it's a known stressor anyway (for reasons I don't understand).

Forcing myself to actually do things rather than sitting on my arse doing fuck all more than arguing lol. Even if that's watching a film instead of being on MN for example. Ideally I would be cleaning, exercising or getting out and about, but when it's miserable out and I've nothing better to be doing, a film can help.

Reflexology.

Acupuncture.

My anxiety seems to both be caused by physical reasons and in turn actually affect me physically. Things which slow my heart rate (apart from exercise while you're doing it which obviously raises the heart rate in the moment) appear to be the key. Sometimes I don't know which came first - the chicken the egg. Whether the anxiety increases the heart rate or whether the increased heart rate increases the anxiety!

They're my useful things. Now, if I actually took my own advice I'd be a great one!

I used to hear about people mentioning they had ‘anxiety’ and would almost roll my eyes because I was so clueless and had no idea what it was, I thought it was almost made up. Sure enough, it got me. I’ve ended up with social anxiety and I’m also anxious about pretty much everything in advance. I’m a teacher and I’m now about to quit my job because of it (plus the fact I hate my job anyway but the anxiety is making it impossible to stay). I can’t even face going off sick because I worry what everyone would say or think and I would need to admit it out loud to my boss. It ruins everything

Sertraline although I've come off that now but it was great for what I was going through. Also the realisation that things I've spent hours worrying over and making myself ill over have, so far, never come to fruition. I still get anxious but it's more manageable right now.

BCxx I was the same. Boy but do I now realise that it's a real thing.

A combination of the following:

Medication
Career change
More exercise
Carving out time to do a hobby just for me.
Proper sleep.

It's all linked together for me. My last career made me miserable so I ended up signed off with stress and being out on sertraline and sleeping tablets.

Getting enough sleep and being away from work helped reset my brain and allowed me to focus on doing something I loved instead (new career).

My new career involves lots of physical activity which in turn boosted my endorphins and helped me sleep as I was exhausted at the end of the day. It also gave me the flexibility needed to start a new hobby which I love.

@thelobsterquadrille Mine are all intertwined in some way too. For e.g. the list and doing things on the list gets me away from arguing and social media while it also means I'm more organised which in turn means I'm not rushing because I'm late and so on and so on.

I very much think that my heart rate seems to be very connected to anxiety though I've yet to figure out whether it's the cause or the effect!

@BCxx I don't suppose you could wear headphones and sunglasses into work haha! 😎

Would being super organised help you? I've no idea whether experienced teachers wing-it/ad lib their classes or whether the night before is spent doing lesson plans, knowing what you're going to be doing might help a little?

In terms of a classroom, from my youth, they tend to be rather cluttered and untidy places too. Within reason, could you structure the classroom into a nice tidy calming and soothing place? It probably depends on whether you're teaching primary or secondary though. It would be a shame to have to leave your job.

@QwithaC re refined seed oils, yes, they’re generally inflammatory and associated with lots of negative health impacts, including anxiety. Dr Uma Naidoo (Harvard nutritional psychiatrist) is a good source of info on this and other foods that help/hinder good mental health. Her book is called This is Your Brain on Food. But there is a lot of info about seed oils available these days. Also take a look at the book This is Why We Eat (Too Much) (author’s name escapes me now but it’s a British surgeon). And yes, sunflower oil (originally developed to lubricate machinery, not to eat), rapeseed oil, corn oil, etc etc. I only use extra virgin olive oil, grass fed butter and ghee. The high polyphenol content of a good evoo is protective of the oil when cooking with it, so claims that it is unhealthy to cook with are unfounded.

Adhd meds have pretty much stopped my anxiety in its tracks and my brain is now quiet.

That's really interesting as I've noticed my diet affects almost everything in some way. I'll have a look for those books. Often, the old ways are the best ways.

The high polyphenol content of a good evoo is protective of the oil when cooking with it This sentence went over my head though. What's an evoo?

Citalopram really helped me, and the app: Headspace, for meditation.
I'm much better than I was, but still have the odd time when it's really hard.

I overcame it over a number of years. When I was very young I was practically mute because of it. I have good confidence now. I basically put myself in situations that terrified me, which showed me practically that it's not that bad. I signed up to read something aloud in sixth form, which I was NOT able to do, I shook, face when red, people laughed. I knew this would happen but my brain would realise that I wasn't actually in any danger.

With overthinking I just had to tell myself, literally in my internal voice, that there is just no point. Bad things will happen anyway and there is zero point in me thinking about it. With personal stuff it's that me worrying would do nothing, so again what was the point?

It was really all my internal voice that did it. Even now in a situation I'm uncomfortable in, which is increasingly rare, it's all about that internal dialogue and conversation. It's like another person, another me, reassuring me and telling me it's all going to be okay.

Left my stressful job, and counselling.

@pastafairyan Yes, my internal dialogue is criticism of myself on loop. I only realised it recently as I've taken to talking myself out loud😮(consequence of living alone) and my goodness but you wouldn't treat your worst enemy the way I treat myself! I've now got a little sign on my fridge saying 'Talk nicely to yourself'.

Stopped all caffeine, then gradually re-introduced a morning coffee and one caffeinated tea after that but with the last caffeinated cup no later than about 11. I re-introduced caffeine only when I was much better, and I did it by mixing decaff and normal coffee 50/50. If I find myself getting jittery, I stop having the caffeinated tea and stick to 100% decaff (PG Tips).

Lots of exercise and getting out in the fresh air more.

Oh no, I'm really sorry to hear that. I would focus on changing that then. I have strong internal dialogue, perhaps that comes from being an only child and very shy, and also living alone for a good while, but I would have arguments with myself in there too.

I think this is a good thing to have identified and if you can change your internal dialogue, maybe have it out with them, tell them that you are in charge and they are there to support you.

It's starting to sound a bit mad but maybe I am but that's okay. My internal dialogue is a big part of my thinking process and probably a big part of yours and changing it will probably really help.

It's interesting others have given up work. Me too...I'm currently working notice and finish in January. I think I might take up sea/lake swimming next year when I have more time.

I've cut out coffee and alcohol at the moment and drink herbally teas, like the Pukka range?

I'm trying to chill out so listening to others on here, I've downloaded a Bronte audio book and am wondering if to sign up to a mindfulness app of some sort.

I've not slept well last night. Three things yesterday sent me into a panic. I've got to the stage where almost everything that can have a negative angle does.

I think I've burnt out to be honest. So have to drag myself from there back to reality. Pity this state feels like reality.

@QwithaC sorry! Extra virgin olive oil.

Honestly, the science of nutrition and mental health is so fascinating and empowering. It’s a rabbit hole well worth disappearing down. The gut brain axis is real - something like 90% of our serotonin is produced in our gut. It does matter what we eat, tremendously.

I've had an awful diet recently in that I've hardly eaten anything. Lost almost all appetite.

I find Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) really helpful, no matter how stressed I feel I'm always much calmer when I've used it. Lots of info on YouTube, I particularly like The Tapping Solution with Nick Ortner.