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Original poster

Never getting school attendance above 80%

41 replies

thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 17:27

Literally don’t know what to do. We just can’t achieve the required attendance.

Ds is year 6 and it’s always in the 70s . Always has been since he started school. A combination of a long term chronic condition plus huge amounts of viruses etc and we just can’t get it better and I’m so worried about secondary school to the point I’m starting to think is home education something to consider for him .
School are understanding but there are big gaps in his learning obviously.
Tried all sorts of vitamins etc and he’s still unwell all the time . Blood tests all fine I think he’s just susceptible to everything!

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I just feel like I’m failing somehow as the target is in the 90s!!!

OP posts:
Tannedandfake · 10/11/2022 17:31

My kids schools expect 97%+
Do you mind sharing the chronic condition?
One of my children has chronic asthma

Purplespottytrousers · 10/11/2022 17:33

I fundamentally disagree with the attendance targets. Some children, like yours, get ill and teachers can’t teach them, nor should they be expected to look after them. If the school is understanding don’t panic about something that hasn’t happened yet

TitaniasAss · 10/11/2022 17:34

If you don't mind me asking, what is the chronic condition? My DD has Type 1 Diabetes.

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TitaniasAss · 10/11/2022 17:34

Purplespottytrousers · 10/11/2022 17:33

I fundamentally disagree with the attendance targets. Some children, like yours, get ill and teachers can’t teach them, nor should they be expected to look after them. If the school is understanding don’t panic about something that hasn’t happened yet

I don't agree with them either.

RobinRobinMouse · 10/11/2022 17:35

Have the doctors said anything, other than blood tests being fine, about why they think it is happening so often? It must be hard for him with his friendship groups etc to be off so regularly, let alone keeping up with the work.

Original poster
thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 17:35

TitaniasAss · 10/11/2022 17:34

If you don't mind me asking, what is the chronic condition? My DD has Type 1 Diabetes.

DS has EDS and PoTs he gets so exhausted he’s at a real disadvantage to start and then he catches everything and a lot of viruses seem to make his conditions worse

OP posts:
Berrystraw · 10/11/2022 17:36

Attendance targets are BS and the fact that they make you feel like this confirms it. My DD is at 80% as she has chronic migraines. She works hard the rest of the time and is on track to get 8/9 in all GCSEs. Attendance is a target for schools which they are rated on which is why they push so hard. If your son is ill then he is Ill.

TitaniasAss · 10/11/2022 17:40

thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 17:35

DS has EDS and PoTs he gets so exhausted he’s at a real disadvantage to start and then he catches everything and a lot of viruses seem to make his conditions worse

Show quote history

Honestly, I would only worry about it if he is falling behind in school and even then, he still can't help being unwell. Maybe extra tutoring at home if that's a feasible option?

Original poster
thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 17:43

He is a bit behind and I’m worried if he’s struggling now how will he manage at secondary school . His primary don’t put pressure on us as they understand the reasons but I’m starting to feel anxious as to how he’s going to manage

OP posts:
Original poster
thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 17:45

He’s on a reduced homework schedule too as he cries and cries as he’s exhausted and can’t focus which is really sad so he just does one set piece each week I know at secondary the homework load is much more

OP posts:
GoodnightJude1 · 10/11/2022 17:46

My DD was off 1 day in the first month of year 10 due to unbearable period pains and very heavy bleeding - she was as white as a ghost and couldn’t stand up straight.

I received a letter from the school saying it would be classed as ‘unauthorised absence’ as ‘menstrual related’ absences basically aren’t a valid reason for being off school.

They expect 97% + attendance.

It’s ridiculous and I told them so.

travellingfamily · 10/11/2022 17:46

It is what it is, and health comes first. Those aren't attendance targets for your child taking in his needs, so just ignore them. Are school supportive?

If it helps, I missed about 1/3 of my year 7, and less, but still a fair amount, of years 8-12 due to health issues requiring frequent trips to hospital. It affected me making friends to start with but not long term, and it didn't affect my grades at all (luckily I was generally 'well' enough to do a reasonable amount of schoolwork from hospital).

Don't worry about the attendance, but focus on what detriment missing school might cause, and work to limit that as much as you can.

Eg - can he socialise with friends online? Which lessons can you prioritise (either attending those specific days, or working on those subjects from home). How close do you live to the school and can you pick him up early/drop him late if that would help?

MithrilCostsMore · 10/11/2022 17:46

Pah, I've got kids like this. Usually get about 81% attendance. Currently in year 9&7 of high school. Both where they need to be educationally and socially. Excelling in most areas. They just get ill a lot.

KweenieBeanz · 10/11/2022 18:03

I don't know if you have tried this but have you tried sort of adjusting the threshold at which you take him in, and taking him in on some days on which you think he might be too ill to go....but let school be the ones to make the call to send him home? I'm sure he'll protest/cry/complain but you need to build evidence that school are the ones always sending him home, as otherwise it could just be that your personal threshold of what is 'too I'll for school' is different to other people's.
I know several parents who keep their kids off for very minor symptoms, and yes their kids generally have lower attendance figures.

How on earth do you manage with your work if you are constantly having to look after a child off school?

everythingissoexpensivenow · 10/11/2022 18:05

School arranged a meeting to discuss and also asked for consent to discuss with Hospital Team to confirm facts and how to put measures in place, when they could attend, for support like passes to leave lessons if needed. All teachers informed. Attendance was abysmal since diagnosis but local authority never contacted us regarding absences as maybe the school informed them about illness (?)

user267451 · 10/11/2022 18:09

I would imagine if he has long term fatigue issues secondary school would put him on a reduced timetable.

TwitTw00 · 10/11/2022 18:09

Attendance at 70% is fairly shocking. Are the doctors who treat him aware it is this low? Is it similar to others with the same condition?

CandyLeBonBon · 10/11/2022 18:11

Similar here. Just had the dreaded letter home. 3 days off with Covid, now another respiratory virus which has floored her this week. If she's I'll she's ill. Not sure what we're supposed to do?

Onnabugeisha · 10/11/2022 18:16

After the Christmas holidays, I’d start engaging with the SENCO at his soon to be secondary school. They should be accommodating his disabilities. Things like ensuring his timetable doesn’t involve going from one end of the school to the other like a ping pong ball. Providing a lift key if it’s more than one floor so he doesn’t have to take the stairs. A pass card to get out of class and go to a quiet rest area, even if just the nurses office & cot for a lie down if needed. No PE or gentle PE as directed by his physio & OT. Ability to ask for extensions on work due if he falls behind due to exhaustion. Agreement on attendance that his chronic conditions mean he won’t meet targets and so they are to flag him in the register so as to not send you automated letters of “your child….absence unacceptable….meet with us or we will fine you” (as these are distressing). Discuss possibilities for working from home if too unwell to go to school but could do a bit of work from his bed or at home- teachers to provide notes for any classes he misses, teachers to email or post any homework they assign and have a way for him to submit work from home back to them.

Untitledsquatboulder · 10/11/2022 18:29

Ds2's attendance is currently running at 55% due to a crohns flare up. He's in secondary. All you can do, imo, is support their learning as best you can and accept that their educational journey is going to look a little different and maybe take a little longer than other children's.

So for ds2 this means doing 1 less gcse than everyone else (this is a recent thing) to provide lower workload, and dh and I being much more involved in his education than we might otherwise be. Luckily between us and his elder brother we have the knowledge to teach him the areas of work he's missed, we use text books and materials the teachers provide for this so time is a greater issue than support. At A level we expect to employ tutors for catch up and he may end up sitting them over 3 rather than 2 years, depending on how well his condition can be controlled.

One thing that has helped us is that his school is really supportive, despite being generally fixated on attendance and grades.

Untitledsquatboulder · 10/11/2022 18:33

Just read what I wrote and God I'm such a fake!😂A couple of weeks ago I was proper panicking about this and now I'm sounding all zen and in control. Must be the cycles of the moon.

Original poster
thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 18:39

We’ve tried a few times sending him when we would usually keep him off just in case we could get attendance up a bit and this then results in him getting worse then being off for even longer as once he’s been pushed past a certain point it takes him longer to recover

OP posts:
Original poster
thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 18:40

TwitTw00 · 10/11/2022 18:09

Attendance at 70% is fairly shocking. Are the doctors who treat him aware it is this low? Is it similar to others with the same condition?

Yes in the past they’ve written letters for us explaining it but that was for the old school who were extremely unsupportive the new school is very supportive so we haven’t needed any letters etc

OP posts:
KweenieBeanz · 10/11/2022 18:44

thatTimeof · 10/11/2022 18:39

We’ve tried a few times sending him when we would usually keep him off just in case we could get attendance up a bit and this then results in him getting worse then being off for even longer as once he’s been pushed past a certain point it takes him longer to recover

Did school send him home? I'd try and always have it that school say he's too ill to be there.
Also have you tried shortened days. As long as he's present at afternoon registration he counts as having attended but perhaps he could finish at 1.30/2pm for a less intense day?
Better to go in more often but for a shorter day.

nicknamehelp · 10/11/2022 18:44

My dd attendance low but her consultant wrote letter to school explaining condition so school always been helpful. Senco have helped and let her drop some subjects from year 7 so can spend time on self study in library. Also had work set for her to do when off.