Abrupt/difficult colleagues

[waeryworrier]

There are a couple of colleagues of mine that are often abrupt and difficult.
I find their sharp tone and passive aggression really bothers me. I mean I know no one likes dealing with people like that - I don't feel I'm pushed about or intimated by these people - but every encounter with them leaves me feeling horrid.
They don't cross the like in terms of saying anything offensive or derogatory, but they always come across as hostile. Other colleagues feel the same as me.

My question is, how do I learn to ignore their nonsense and rise above it, without it disrupting my own peace? I don't want to give these muppets anymore of my headspace but I find I feel stressed and attacked for a few hours after dealing with them!

Just keep smiling and ignore their arsy tone? They probably don't like you much either but who cares.

Are they really abrupt and difficult?

Or are they direct and to the point and don't dress up everything in flowery language?

Ha ha yeah I mean they probably don't like me much either. Although i don't think their way with me is personal, they are like that with everyone. But I doubt they give me a second thought - and that's my point really, I wish I didn't give them a second thought - but I do, I feel patronised and just a bit shit after dealing with them. How do I stop being bothered by them? I don't mind if they don't like me - but abrupt and passive aggressive aggressive responses are unnecessary. There's people I don't like and that's fine, but I'm still professional and helpful.

You can't change people I know, so I'm trying to work out how I stop it bothering me!

What industry do you work in? Could you say - you have a really abrupt tone and it makes me on edge! These things can be said in a lighthearted way that doesn't apportion blame on someone for making you feel a certain way, but communicates- this is how you impact me

When I have to deal with people (even on small issues) who I find very difficult, I spend a couple of minutes preparing beforehand. This way I know exactly what I want from the conversation and I have more confidence. I also try to consider if this is a good time to interrupt them and what is the best way to contact them (email/conversation), etc.

If people are abrupt/sharp then I try not to let it get to me (easier said than done), remain calm and don’t over analyse. Being positive with yourself (at least you were not rude and remained professional) helps too.

Over time you develop a much thicker skin and it will bother you less and less.

If someone was very rude, however, I would do something about it, but I don’t think that is the case in your situation.