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Is it weird to buy a house next door to a friend?

36 replies

JauntyJinty · 08/11/2022 16:18

A house has come on the market recently that although not our absolute dream house would certainly work for us and ticks a lot of boxes. There are some things wrong with it such a weird layout and needing decorating throughout, but they aren't insurmountable and make it much more affordable than it would be if perfect. It's a lot more house than we've been looking at in the same area for the same price

Thing is the neighbours are existing friends - which part of me thinks is a really good thing! If there's a loud party or anything we'd be invited, handy for someone to feed the cats (would be reciprocal of course!), and we know they won’t be nightmare neighbours which is always a bit of a worry moving somewhere new.
Not sure if this matters but to avoid drip feeds - They were really close friends around 10 years ago, and life circumstances have meant we've drifted apart a bit - but no big falling out or anything like that. We still see each other a few times a year and it's always a good time on both sides (I think!)

I feel a bit odd about it as if I’d be moving in on their turf or something! We’re not even dead set on the house yet, I just noticed the for sale sign when I was dropping something around the other day and decided to have a look. But it’s a niggling though in my head, “we can’t buy right next to Bob and Sally, can we?” (fake names) – I might just be over thinking and need to give my head a wobble!

Anyone have any thoughts or been in a similar circumstance?

OP posts:
WireSkills · 09/11/2022 10:26

I became very good friends with my NDN and still see them regularly even though we've both moved on.

When we did live next door to each other we didn't actually see each other very often, as our schedules didn't often match up.

I'm sure you'd settle in to a bit of a routine of longer chats every so often, occasional evenings round each others' houses, texts moaning about other neighbours, a quick "morning!" as you're getting in the car, etc, as I did with my NDN.

Having said that, it would feel a little odd if a friend now wanted to move next door to me, but overall I don't think it would bother me.

It is great for pet sitting and keeping an eye on the house when you're away.

VitaminX · 09/11/2022 10:38

I think it's nice to be friends with your neighbours. It gives a lovely community feel. We've made friends with a few neighbours and it's nothing but positive. Not best friends, but we have a chat, do favours for each other, the kids play together, bbqs and that. I wouldn't want to be completely surrounded by strangers.

fruitbrewhaha · 09/11/2022 10:45

Of course you can buy the house next door. OP you have to remember mumset is a place where people don't answer the door.

Just because you are next door it doesn't mean you have to hang out all the time, you just crack on as normal. I live in a village and so know people via the school on every street. There's no getting away from it. It's nice to get on with people in the area. You don't have to live in each other's pocket, or invite them every time you have someone over.

FartOutLoudDay · 09/11/2022 10:48

We were friends with both sets of neighbours before they moved in (and they with each other also), no issues on our part (over the years we’ve probably caused the least drama of the three) and it’s never particularly bothered me - we hear them tell their kids off, they hear us tell ours off, they hear our kids fighting, we hear their teen and friends partying, we all look out for each other, feed cats, put bins out, collect parcels, borrow tools. We’re not “pop in for a cuppa” people but we socialise with them outside of the house and occasionally pop to one side for drinks which is great as kids can nip in and out of both houses entertaining themselves. If you like the house I wouldn’t let it put you off.

Notonthestairs · 09/11/2022 10:51

I must have the hide of a rhino because this wouldn't bother me at all.

But then I've had dreadful neighbours in the past (police around regularly) so navigating a bit of chit chat in the driveway doesn't seem particularly bad.

FaazoHuyzeoSix · 09/11/2022 10:53

Don't let this put you off if it's the right house for you. Remember that your friends primary interest in the fact of their neighbours house being for sale is the possibility of the new neighbours being awful in some way. So assuming that they don't consider you to be awful, it would be good news for them.

I'd drop them a line on whatsapp or whatever saying something like "hiya, how's things? We've been househunting and see that the house next door to you is for sale! Not sure if it's right for us yet. Is there anything we should know about the otherwise idyllic life on your street? At least we could be sure of getting on well with the neighbours!"

Then it's not weird if you suddenly turn up on removals day.

CookPassBabtridge · 09/11/2022 10:54

I would hate this.. I'm friendly with neighbours in a "you alright? Yeah fine ta" way but I like to be able to shut the door, live seperate lives and have peace.

Imissmoominmama · 09/11/2022 10:58

DH vetoed a house next to someone who later became a friend. I’m so glad because she turned out to be a fucking nightmare. So glad I’m not just over the fence from her.

girlmom21 · 09/11/2022 10:59

I'm glad you've decided against it OP. I'd find it quite intrusive.

CatsEatDogs · 09/11/2022 11:15

VitaminX · 09/11/2022 10:38

I think it's nice to be friends with your neighbours. It gives a lovely community feel. We've made friends with a few neighbours and it's nothing but positive. Not best friends, but we have a chat, do favours for each other, the kids play together, bbqs and that. I wouldn't want to be completely surrounded by strangers.

Absolutely it’s nice to be friends with neighbours and I am very good friends with mine but we met and made friends because of living next door. That’s very different to an existing friend moving next door to you

Coffeepot72 · 09/11/2022 11:46

Absolutely it’s nice to be friends with neighbours and I am very good friends with mine but we met and made friends because of living next door. That’s very different to an existing friend moving next door to you

Yes, it's great to be friends with your neighbours, but becoming neighbours with your friends is a tad different!

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