What do I do now.. fertility related.

[emevol]

So. My DH and I have been TTC for over 2.5 years now with no joy.

We were told to try looking weight, which we've been very successful in; and between us we've lost 18st since February of this year. Maybe I've been very naive; but I thought that would help us with our chances of conception massively...Yet still we are struggling. ☹️

Last week I had day 21 bloods, which today have come back normal but I am anaemic, so I've been asked to take iron.
Is it weird that I feel absolutely gutted that there's no 'issues' because that means there's nothing to work on / improve to better my chances? 😔 I feel deflated.

What do I do now?! I've been on the NHS fertility waiting list for 1.5 years now and yesterday got a call to advise that I'm at the top of their list, so I've got a gynaecology appointment later this month which should give me some insight...

My DH hasn't once been checked / examined. How do I get the ball rolling in that respect?! I just feel flat.

Sorry for the long and depressing question.
Thanks for any guidance :-)

When we were going through infertility investigations, my GP did d21 bloods followed by d2/3 bloods a couple of months to see if there was a pattern or not. He also arranged for DH to have a sperm count done as, in his words, the gynaecologist would want to know whether there were issues on one, the other or both sides. I would get him to book a phone appointment to discuss having a sperm count done in time for your clinic appointment.

My referral kept failing because DH was going for a semen analysis and they were messing up the appointment. After 3 years I skipped the testing and went straight to private IVF. I would push for the semen analysis ASAP as they will not complete your testing without that

Well done for you and your DH's weight loss. That's a phenomenal achievement. I would imagine it will take your bodies time to adjust to your new weights.

I had ivf many years ago, but before we were referred to fertility clinic I her several lots of blood taken through my GP and dh had to do a semen sample. I'd be pushing for that as it's easier to rule in or out as an issue.

Hopefully your appt next month will be able to provide more insight. Good luck

No advice but just wow on the weight loss!

Congratulations on the weight loss, that's absolutely amazing.

I had fertility treatment a few years ago. I am struggling to recall the exact sequence of events, but I think at the initial appointment with the fertility clinic I had to have a trans-vaginal scan and further blood tests were ordered and DH had to provide a semen sample. Then we had a follow up appointment to discuss the results. This led to a recommendation to proceed to IVF - to be honest I was a bit taken aback by how quickly this was recommended and the absence of further investigations, but I think it was mainly due to my age - I was 36 - as the success rates for IVF decline quite rapidly after 35.

I absolutely understand what you mean by being disappointed not to be able to identify a clear issue. Actually a significant proportion of people who are referred to IVF have 'unexplained infertility' and this was the case for us. Try to look at it another way, if you have no identified issue there's no reason why you shouldn't be able to get pregnant.

It's definitely true that NHS infertility treatment is based around the woman with much less attention given to male fertility issues. I think this is essentially because you are the one who will be having treatment. If there are sperm issues they will often recommend ICSI, which is similar to IVF but with additional intervention at the fertilisation stage.

Thank you all so much for taking the time to answer.
I also really appreciate the kind words regarding our weight loss! 🥰

I have been on the phone with the GP to organise a semen analysis for DH, So I am hoping that this will happen soon.