The depressing cost of childcare

[Juicylychee]

I’ve been reading about March of the Mummies yesterday, I didn’t know about it in advance to go. I have an almost 2 year old and pay £1k a month for three days of nursery. Really wanted another baby close together but we just cannot afford it. It’s maddening.

But a £2 million house in one area (a very expensive area possibly, if childcare is that high) might be equivalent to a £1 million in a different area of London.
Of course if you think a difference of £1100 a month if only a bit of money then you probably don't have to be worrying too much about the overall cost of childcare like OP does.

I heard the largest UK nursery chain (BusyBees?) is Canadian owned. So as with many businesses if they go bust there will be a major issue childcare issues and parents unable to work.

It’s a disgrace what nursery staff get paid for such an important job.

@Intru Women unavoidably need to take maternity leave so are at an inherent disadvantage regardless of childcare arrangements.

Yes! It’s such a strange perspective.
I tried to look up the figures - government spending on early years childcare per year: around £3billion
government spending on pensions and care for the elderly: over £125billion!!!
Why don’t the youngest in our society deserve anywhere near the same level of support as the oldest?!

Childcare was one of the main reasons we have a gap of 8 years.
Not a chance we would have been able to pay 2 sets of nursery fees.

Using breakfast/ Afterschool club for the youngest 5 days a week and holiday club. Luckily Childcare Vouchers covers this fully.

I had 2 children under 2. Deliberately close in age to limit how long my career was interrupted. But it has come ag a hefty price... until my oldest son turned 3 (and we qualified for some free hours we were paying more than £3000 per month in childcare fees! It's gone down a little now that my oldest is 3, but still more than £2500 a month. At one point, I was literally paying more in childcare than I earned. Even now, it's not really financially worth me being at work (but I work full time for my career development, pension and sanity - hated being a SAHM on mat leave!!).
It's rubbish and really does limit women's careers. I chose to look at the long-term gains and suck up the astronomical cost for now... but I know that's not a possibility for everyone.

I think if you work out childcare costs before having a baby and know you will really struggle, then just don't have the baby. I wouldn't knowingly get pregnant if I thought I'd have to spend the majority of my wage putting my 1 year old in nursery. Either you can afford the fees or a SAHP or you can't afford a baby. I know you can work shifts around each other, but that's not much of a life, barely seeing your family.

Of course I'm talking about planned babies, not suprise multiples or changes in circumstances further down the line.

You’re looking at that he wrong way round. It’s the maternity leave and childcare that causes the discrepancy, we out-earn men up until that becomes a factor, so going by your earnings argument it’s our husbands who should be the ones more likely to take the career break.

Absolutely! I earned more than my husband pre children, then went on mat leave. Despite me being the higher earner, when we discussed part time, it was with me in mind, as my career had already been interrupted by mat leave!

Oh fuck off! @Tillsforthrills you are missing the point. Loads of us on here are barely getting by despite being in good jobs. We know nursery workers are paid crap money, there needs to be a total overhaul of the system.

I think if you work out childcare costs before having a baby and know you will really struggle, then just don't have the baby. I wouldn't knowingly get pregnant if I thought I'd have to spend the majority of my wage putting my 1 year old in nursery. Either you can afford the fees or a SAHP or you can't afford a baby.

So... reproduction should be viewed as a luxury that only the affluent can afford...?

We live in Switzerland. Public creche is subsidised and full time public creche costs between £1500 and £2000 per month.
Full time private creche costs a whopping £3200 per month. I know pregnant women that put their kids name on the public creche waiting list when they're 8 weeks pregnant. Places are prioritised to those kids with parents who both work. As Im a SAHM we have been at the bottom of the list for 2 years. I'm applying for jobs now but will need to find a job that can cover the childcare costs and make it worthwhile as likely will have to pay for private creche. Feels like the system is designed to keep women at home! God knows how you afford 2 kids.

@Tillsforthrills you are missing the point. Loads of us on here are barely getting by despite being in good jobs

Yep! I'm on around £64k at the moment, which I consider a good salary. But still, with my two boys in full time nursery, it's hardly worth working at all... there was a point last year where childcare cost more than I earned (and I earn more than my husband)... even now our 30 hours 'free' childcare has kicked in for my oldest son, it's still a struggle getting from month to month without getting overdrawn. I have no idea how people on average household incomes, or below average, cope.

@surreygirl1987 That’s the point though,
we’re at an inherent disadvantage because we’re the ones who give birth and take mat leave and from there it spirals.

Feels like the system is designed to keep women at home!

Absolutely agree.

Well, unless childcare costs go down, yes. You have to live within your means. Not everyone can afford a dog, not everyone can afford a child.

@surreygirl1987 That’s the point though,
we’re at an inherent disadvantage because we’re the ones who give birth and take mat leave and from there it spirals.

Not sure which comment you are responding to, but yes, I fully agree!

That was to @surreygirl1987

Just want to add that where we live in Canada and it's $8 a day. Government subsidiary.

So it's possible.

I have put two children through pre- School in Canada and couldn't be happier with the system.

Absolutely shocking what you pay in the UK.

Absolutely detrimental to women

Feels like the system is designed to keep women at home!

^

This is absolutely what it is designed to do.

Why women haven't realised this and are not more pissed off about it I don't know.

The system enables men

Because, you know, they don't have enough enablement

That was to @surreygirl1987

Yes I know, that's me, but I've made lots of comments on this thread and it's not clear which one you're referring to.

Regardless though, I fully agree with what you say about women being at an inherent disadvantage.

I agree that there needs to be an overhaul of the system but it’s not the £9/£10 that’s unreasonable, is it? So the ‘extortionate childcare’ costs aren’t actually at all extortionate.

I haven’t missed any point and your nasty reaction is typical of someone who is the one who has missed the point entirely, due to feeling attacked by what I said, because people don’t like that part pointed out.

*This is absolutely what it is designed to do.

Why women haven't realised this and are not more pissed off about it I don't know.

The system enables men

Because, you know, they don't have enough enablement*

Yep!!

the more I think about it the more I become almost apoplectic with rage, at the absolute shit that parents now hAve to cope with. I’ve said this in other threads but why there are not crowds descending on Downing Street and rattling the gates there I will never know. It feels like we are on the brink of the “let them eat cake/bread” period of Marie Antoinette.

^

Brits don't demonstrate. They won't go out and march like the French. Right? We're too polite.

Which does precisely fuck all for our rights

So the ‘extortionate childcare’ costs aren’t actually at all extortionate.

Um... well they are! Do you not think £3k on childcare per month is extortionate? More than I earned (despite a decent salary)? I can't see how anybody can argue otherwise to be honest!