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Original poster

Would you assume a parent is present if your DC is invited?

26 replies

CrazySchoolTimes · 26/10/2022 16:32

Text from dad this morning, inviting DD to play this afternoon.

When I dropped her off, no one answered the door but the younger brother (8) climbed out the window and called us over. Friend (10) also climbed out, apologised that they'd left keys at their mum's so couldn't open the door. Another head popped up, mutual friend of DD and Friend. Left DD to climb in their window...

But I'm a bit surprised that the 3 (? or 4 if brother also had friend over) were alone when DD was specifically invited for that time. Obviously Friend's dad has no issue and mutual friend's mum has no issue. Am I weird and over protective for assuming I'd be told if there was no adult present?

Disclaimer: I have let DD go to her best friend's house without an adult but that was discussed with mum first and planned to the minute!

OP posts:
liveforsummer · 26/10/2022 16:35

Did you leave her there? I'm pretty relaxed. Dd12 is currently at her friends with no adult there but at 10 no way I'd leave her in that situation. Sounds like a recipe for disaster and they can't even open the door. What if there was a fire?

OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 26/10/2022 16:37

Huh? You must let your 10 year old climb in to a house with multiple children present, none older than 10 and no way of opening doors and left?

Erm no. No I would not leave my child in that situation.

Multiple 10 year olds more likely to do something daft than 1.

10 year olds are really not olds enough to be responsible for 8 year olds.

Ffs not being able to open doors rather a big issue in the event of a fire!

SheWoreYellow · 26/10/2022 16:37

At 10? That’s the age of leaving them for 20 minutes, on their own, not with a younger sibling. And definitely not with a friend.

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Rauha · 26/10/2022 16:38

No way would I be comfortable leaving a child in that situation.

lannistunut · 26/10/2022 16:38

I would not have left my child in this very odd situation.

toomuchlaundry · 26/10/2022 16:38

That sounds like a recipe for disaster. Did you text dad about the key

Original poster
CrazySchoolTimes · 26/10/2022 16:39

Sounds like a recipe for disaster and they can't even open the door. What if there was a fire?
I assume they'd climb out the window.

I can see their building from mine, I would hear if one of them shouted and I could get there in 1 minute if I were to run through my neighbour's garden. (As opposed to 5 minutes walking the proper way).

OP posts:
Circumferences · 26/10/2022 16:40

If the Dad specifically invited DD for that afternoon, I would have thought he'd be around.

In the event of an adult not being around at the exact moment I dropped off, I would assume they'd be there any minute later. Like, they'd popped to the shops for 10 mins or something.

10 year olds are bonkers but not much they can do in a short space of time

What did DD dad say about it?

Pixiedust1234 · 26/10/2022 16:40

Well...thats a bit of a fire risk isnt it. Unable to open an external door Confused

I would never let my child go into another house without seeing another adult there, even from a distant to wave at.

Circumferences · 26/10/2022 16:41

Given your update, I wouldn't worry about it but the DD dad looks a bit irresponsible.

Siepie · 26/10/2022 16:42

I would expect a parent there at that age. But more importantly than that, I would expect an opening door! I can't believe you let your child climb into a house where the door can't be opened in an emergency (not just for children to get out, but also for adults - paramedics etc - to get in).

Discovereads · 26/10/2022 16:42

Are you sure no adult is home? Perhaps one is there but taking a nap/has a migraine/ or (typical of men) having a long 45min poo in the toilet and simply did not come to the door?

Pixiedust1234 · 26/10/2022 16:42

I'm starting to wonder if the dad actually sent the text or if one of the kids borrowed it...

ZeroFuchsGiven · 26/10/2022 16:43

CrazySchoolTimes · 26/10/2022 16:39

Sounds like a recipe for disaster and they can't even open the door. What if there was a fire?
I assume they'd climb out the window.

I can see their building from mine, I would hear if one of them shouted and I could get there in 1 minute if I were to run through my neighbour's garden. (As opposed to 5 minutes walking the proper way).

Why did you take your dd there if you can see from your house where you she was going and it was a 1 minute walk?

Cavviesarethebest · 26/10/2022 16:43

Christ so you’re expecting the paramedics to just climb in through the window?

very neglectful of the father to leave the alone

neglectful of you to leave them all locked in there

ZeroFuchsGiven · 26/10/2022 16:44

Did you actually ask the kids where their dad was?

Gunpowder · 26/10/2022 16:44

I’m quite relaxed and will leave my 10 year old alone for up to an hour, but no way would I leave her younger siblings, or leave her if she was having friends over.

EatingWormsMichael · 26/10/2022 16:45

I'd not have left dd. I'd have texted the dad to ask when he'd be back so you can drop her.

Original poster
CrazySchoolTimes · 26/10/2022 16:45

Are you sure no adult is home?
yes, the friend said he wasn't there - and she looked like he would be annoyed they'd left their keys at their mum's. Else he could have unlocked the door!

They have doors that open into their garden but I don't know if they are locked with a key or just a handle in the inside. They have three rooms with windows so could get out of any.

OP posts:
Original poster
CrazySchoolTimes · 26/10/2022 16:46

Why did you take your dd there if you can see from your house where you she was going and it was a 1 minute walk?
she asked me to 🤷‍♀️ Normally she goes by herself.

OP posts:
Florin · 26/10/2022 16:47

I have a 10 year old and not a flipping chance would I leave him in this situation however close you were.

britespark1 · 26/10/2022 16:48

This all sounds very odd. I wouldn’t be leaving my 10 year old there even if I could see the building. Did you text the dad to ask where he was since he’s arranged it?

liveforsummer · 26/10/2022 16:49

I don't think the update makes it better. I doubt OP is going to stand in the garden listening out for any shouts for help. To answer your OP yes, at 10 I'd expect a parent present apart from in the occasional highly planned circumstance. Not a hope I'd leave them in that bizarre, chaotic situation you describe. Did you not even text the dad to see what was going on?

Scout2016 · 26/10/2022 17:15

You left a 10 year old home alone supervising an 8 year old? No idea when adult would be back, how long they had been alone, no front door keys?
I wouldn't have left my child there, no,and nor would I leave other people's children in that situation.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 26/10/2022 17:28

Surely any parent would ask 'where is your dad?' 'how long will he be? ok get him to text me when hes back and ill bring dd over.

OR why didnt you text the dad saying 'just brought dd round but there is noone here' and wait for a response. Instead you just left a house full of kids on their own with no idea when a parent would be coming back?

Most strange.

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