i have been with my bf for 11 months, first found out I was pregnant after 6 weeks. He was adamant he didn’t want it, we hardly knew each other. I had an abortion when I was 21 now 36 no kids, divorced. Didn’t think I would ever have kids. Anyway agreed to the termination. Was an awful experience and left me suicidal. Took me 4 months to recover mentally, and we split up. While we split up I found out I was pregnant again. We weren’t even together so again he didn’t want it and I didn’t wanna do it on my own. So another termination. Was very embarrassed. Then we got back together things had been great and now I’m pregnant again. I wanted to keep it, he said he didn’t want it again. But blames me, says I trapped him and did it on purpose abs won’t take any responsibility. I thought if I stood my ground and said I’m keeping it he would come round but now he’s left me. And I’m 11 weeks. I’m so scared to do this on my own but also don’t know if I could actually survive another abortion. I’m scared to give birth and have a newborn alone. I never expected to find myself in this situation. Also I had precancerous cells removed so have part of my cervix missing which makes me a risk and my age. I just feel so lost and lonely. Any advice welcome xx