My mother and stepfather were both very abusive people to me (not my brothers, just me)
Every kind of abuse you can imagine, my mother even called my SA an affair and she forgave me (I was 11 and he was in his 50s when she found out)
My stepfather is long dead, and my mother is in her 80s now, but I recently received a letter from her detailing what a great mum she is and how things were acceptable on that time period that aren't now and I'm just a dick basically. Also saying I'm judging her parenting by today's standards.
A lot of the abuse (beatings with various things etc) is obviously abuse, but she is defending some things.
- making me eat a tub of butter when I was unwell, I would only be allowed a day off if I ate all the butter otherwise I wasn't deemed ill enough.
- if I bit my nails she would put tabasco sauce all over my tongue and make me sit with my tounge out for 10 mins like that.
- if I said I didn't like what she cooked for dinner (everything was always deep friend and disgusting) she would make me go to the garden and eat dirt.
- if I had a shower and put a tiny bit of water on the floor she would get her husband to stand in the room next time, sometimes filming it so they could tell me what I was doing wrong, this went on until I was about 15.
She says all of these things were normal, so I'm just checking, they weren't, were they?
I'm not replying to her letter, I have no intention of ever talking to her again, I haven't for over a decade. She's gaslighting me again, isn't she?