How to stop being fussy with food

[Corncrunch]

I have a problem with textures of food I eat mainly a very beige diet. I do eat veg but it’s very limited I’m find it so frustrating. I love to cook and always cook from scratch I make my own bread and pasta and always find complex things to make I do cookery courses it’s a hobby and obsession. I just want to be able to enjoy things and not have to be seen as fussy. I always try new things and will try cook different food so it’s a different texture. But has anyone got over this how can I as it’s getting me down?

I suspect your issue is with people around you. Eat what you enjoy, if they don't like it then they can make their own food.

I have no time for people with limited palates who can't taste or enjoy simple food as it comes and insinuate that you have the issue when it's their limited brain/taste buds.

Some people like to eat slops only and some like a meal to be the texture that it should be, leave them to it, you enjoy the textures let them cook for themselves instead if trying to make you feel bad.

No I’m the one with the issue I cook lovely meals for my partner and us but it’s always separate veg for us a I only eat certain types. I really want to get over it but I don’t no how I constantly cook and try new food but struggle to enjoy it unless I’m ok with the texture and taste

If you can't tolerate is surely you can't. If you were autistic and couldn't cope with noise and crowds but you enjoy music you wouldn't be considering ways you could still go to Glastonbury. Is it that it's taking enjoyment from your life e.g. you can't go out to eat with your partner as the menu options might not be suitable? I don't have any practical advice but this is one of those things I don't think needs to become a battle if it need not be.

*it

maybe it’s a battle I with myself I need to stop it just impacts my life as my diet isn’t the best I have to check menus before I make a reservation to make sure there is something I would like. I also have an illness that can be helped my eating healthier but I can’t anymore than I do.

I do have adhd and have managed to find ways to cope with festivals like ear defenders camping in the quiet camp or family camping etc.

I was an incredibly fussy eater and have known a few. (One of whom I only knew after she'd gotten passed it and never would have guessed.)

Something I learnt recently that fits in with my own experience, is that it's good to introduce new foods in new contexts. Just don't put yourself under pressure because that's no fun.

If it's something you really want to change for yourself, I think your best option would be challenge, repeat. It's a mantra often used in recovery from a restrictive eating disorder. It works on the basis of the more you do something the easier it becomes. So you pick one veg, maybe the one you would most like to accomplish and just keep plucking away at it, challenging it as frequently as you can manage, until it no longer poses a problem.

I wonder if there could be another gradual, build up approach. So for example if you struggle with say the texture of raw carrots you might start with mashed carrots or even mashed carrot mixed with mashed potato to top a cottage. One you are ok with that you try really well cooked carrots so they are nice and soft, then roasted carrots, then raw grated carrot then match stick raw carrots then the usual carrot batons.

Firstly fussy eaters are only annoying when they make it an identity and want public acknowledgment of how special they are. And ime they don’t tend to be people like you with genuine issues around certain things, so no reason you should feel like you need to change for anyone else.

If it’s genuinely for your own benefit, have you tried cooking things in different ways and/ or serving it in different manners. Eg I think the appearance and texture of eggs is vomit inducing. But in a quiche where both are disguised they’re lovely. Or very well fried, spread out large and thin with the yolk burst so it’s slightly crispy and doesn’t have the texture of a microwaved slug, they really do improve a bacon sandwich.

I had arfid as a child and am still not a great eater, but I have improved. I went out for a Sunday dinner with my friends a few weeks ago and managed to try new things and ate my safe foods even though they had touched other things. I was so proud of myself!

I found a safe environment helps as does food that's been cooked really, really well. I go with DH to nice restaurants that have stuff I can eat and he has what he wants. I can try a bit off his plate without worrying. I found I like carrot raw and cabbage lightly cooked with a fuck tonne of butter black pepper that way. They are now regular parts of my diet. Previously I would have run away from both because I'd only had boiled carrots <boak> and cabbage cooked badly <double boak>

I think a good place to start would be which are the veg & textures that you do like, and then think of ways to serve others in the same way.

But it’s fine to genuinely not like particular things too.

Similar to @TrainspottingWelsh I can’t stand cooked egg whites, but if it’s mashed up in a sandwich or mixed together in an omelette and we’ll cooked through I’ll eat it, sometimes it’s about finding out what version of something you like.

Isn't said you need to try something 20 times to like it?

Maybe try one thing every evening for 3 weeks. Just touch it to your mouth if that's all you can do, so just a little bit each time. You may find you can tolerate it more and more each night. (Have vague memories of a TV programme where there did this and ended up with kids willing eating kale.)

You are neurodiverse and I expect this is part of that. Dd and I are autistic and very particular about what we will eat. Try new things if you want to but in a non-stressful environment and if you don't like it, you don't like it. Try to accept yourself for who you are and take a multivitamin, that's how we have dealt with it