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Original poster

C section as elective… wrong choice?

30 replies

Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 13:34

I’ve been put in for it but was told ‘it’s not necessary and to think about it.’ This has made me second guess myself. My circumstances are that I live an hour from hospital, I have no support for the birth and I am very emotionally fragile. I do have some support at home, cleaning, cooking etc. I felt more comfortable with a c section even though it still terrifies me. I’m really low and now confused after this comment. If anyone has elected this was it right for you?

OP posts:
Tezco · 22/10/2022 13:36

My ELCS was definitely right for me, very calm atmosphere.

I healed pretty well though and could manage most things by the time I got home two days later - I think taking pain killers religiously and getting up and standing straight really helped with the healing process.

If you have support at home hopefully it won't be too bad for you but I'd 100% back a c section, I'm having another one in three weeks (all going well).

Awrite · 22/10/2022 13:37

If it's what you want, go for it. They cost more so they will of course put pressure on you to change your mind.

Ultimately, it will be you going through it so you decide.

I have had elective 2 c sections. Absolutely no regrets.

Ivyonafence · 22/10/2022 13:39

I had two planned csections due to breach presentation. I was relieved. I get bad anxiety and the 'unknown' aspect of birth would have been bad for me mentally.

Both csections were calm and went well. Recovery is not to be taken lightly but also doable especially with help at home.

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Original poster
Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 13:39

@Awrite @Tezco thank you. They kept saying there was much more risk etc than a usual vaginal birth. I’m already upset about it as I NEVER thought I would be on my own like this so would have definitely had a natural birth otherwise. That in itself is hard for me and I know my decision here is to try and limit the extent of emotional trauma that could come from being alone during vaginal birth.. but is that an ok reason? I don’t know anymore. I just want it all over with. I also read somewhere that the baby isn’t necessarily ready to be born and that made me feel bad too. I feel so stressed about it all and worried it would hurt while it’s happening!

OP posts:
Original poster
Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 13:43

I’m worried it’s a selfish thing to do if it’s more risk and the baby only has me

OP posts:
Snowdropsarelovely · 22/10/2022 13:43

I had a planned section due to anxiety. It was 100% the right decision for me. Good luck and I hope you get the birth you want

Awrite · 22/10/2022 13:46

C sections are statically safer for baby. When you compare like for like, ie healthy pregnancy v healthy pregnancy.

They carry a slightly greater risk for the Mum.

The reasons why a lot of c sections happen muddy the waters when people try to compare risks.

tickticksnooze · 22/10/2022 13:50

Who is "they"?

TheHouseonHauntedHill · 22/10/2022 13:50

Really, what increased risk?

Ask them for evidence if you can be bothered. years ago the biggest cost to maternity issue's were life long care pay outs from botched births.

When they say it's not necessary remember they also will be talking from a hips point of view eg , all well with pregnancy.

You are, we are all more than a pair of hips

tarheelbaby · 22/10/2022 13:58

I've had both a C-section (unplanned) and a VBAC and I would say C-section every time. There are risks for both but at least the medics can make a reasonable effort to control the C-section. Stick to your guns and insist on a C-section if you want one and don't feel guilty. Do what's best for YOU!

I did not feel any 'special magic' when I gave birth the old-fashioned way on gas & air. After the birth, I was on painkillers for several days.

My VBAC recovery was horrendous, despite being reassured through my whole pregnancy that it would be quicker and easier. Due to traumatised tissue, I was on a catheter for 3 weeks, couldn't drive and couldn't walk more than a few hundred meters without pain. 11mos after my 'natural' birth, I had to miss 8+ weeks from work to have reconstructive surgery and recover. If I'd had a C-section, my undercarriage would have been intact, I would have been able to walk anywhere in my village and I could have recovered during my mat leave like the first time.

Nursemumma92 · 22/10/2022 14:00

If it feels like the right decision for you then stick with it. You are not putting your baby at risk by having an ELCS. It is true that sometimes babies born by caesarean have some difficulties breathing when they are born as they are not squeezed through the birth canal so there airways are full of mucus but they are given that bit of help and are fine. And some have no issues at all.

They are unlikely to book you in for an ELCS before 38 weeks so baby should be developmentally ready.

Hope it all goes ok for you, sorry you have found yourself in this position. Do not let any Dr or midwife make you feel bad about a decision that is right for you and your baby.

Original poster
Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 14:01

@tickticksnooze staff at my appointment and what I’ve read myself generally! @TheHouseonHauntedHill Increased risk they said was basically infection and pain afterwards. It’s made me v scared but I am an anxious person anyway.

After the appointment I came out feeling like a right weak person for wanting it. I always wanted to experience birth so it’s been hard for me to come to this decision but in the circumstances I am not sure how I would cope with the alternative. It’s been really hard mentally to get my head around and I definitely don’t want to harm the baby by my weak decision. Just feel a bit rubbish about myself.

OP posts:
TheHouseonHauntedHill · 22/10/2022 14:07

Infections to whom?

ScarlettOHaraHamiltonKennedyButler · 22/10/2022 14:09

I've had two, both 100% the right choice. I was also encouraged to 'think about it' so I did, and reached the same decision.

Awrite · 22/10/2022 14:09

It's normal to feel vulnerable when pregnant. More so when you are on your own.

You know your reasons for C section. Stick to your guns. Once a date it set, that's it, they will back off.

Original poster
Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 14:09

@TheHouseonHauntedHill me afterwards. Obviously I knew there was that possibility but I thought that could happen with vaginal too.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 14:10

@ScarlettOHaraHamiltonKennedyButler do you mind me asking why you had yours? I felt so unsettled when they said they wouod do it but I should think again… I was thinking I’ve thought of nothing else already!

OP posts:
TheHouseonHauntedHill · 22/10/2022 14:11

Of course it can!
If you tear below it's much harder to see or Keep track of what's going on .
Of course you might not tear below.

ScarlettOHaraHamiltonKennedyButler · 22/10/2022 14:18

Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 14:10

@ScarlettOHaraHamiltonKennedyButler do you mind me asking why you had yours? I felt so unsettled when they said they wouod do it but I should think again… I was thinking I’ve thought of nothing else already!

I have some issues with my spine and pelvis. They couldn't tell me whether I would be able to give birth naturally but that I should 'give it a go' because sections are risky and tough recovery etc. etc the usual.

I didn't back down, I know people (my Mum for one) who suffered terrible birth injuries from natural birth so i wasn't scared by their cesarean horror stories as both ways can go wrong and have consequences for both mother and baby.

FWIW I had two amazing experiences and perfectly fine recoveries (slightly harder with the second one but still ok, not awful).

grapehyacinthisactuallyblue · 22/10/2022 14:28

I had emergency c-section. I really wanted to have elective c-section rather than natural birth, but wasn't confident enough to say so. And end up in c- section anyway, after long horrible time. While I was in hospital, there were others who had elective. Really thought I should have had it too. They seemed like everything was planned and in order and calm.
So yeah, don't worry about what other people say, just go for it if that's what is best for you.

glassfully · 22/10/2022 14:33

I had a natural birth followed by an emergency hysterectomy. I ended up with an infection in the wound from my episiotomy but my hysterectomy scar healed fine. I was still peeing in a shallow bath (to avoid the burning) long after my hysterectomy scar had healed.

It is extremely uncommon for a birth to end that way but I mention it because doctors often gloss over the risks of natural birth when trying to talk women out of c sections. If I had the choice again, I'd elect for a c section because it is much more controlled. There's no predicting how a natural birth will go.

Littlegoth · 22/10/2022 14:37

Mine was brilliant. Baby out in about 10 mins, all done and dusted in under 45 mins. I was spinal only so quick work was essential and expertly done. Minimal blood loss, up and about less that 7 hours later (carefully!). I was in hospital for 5 nights as my baby had a few challenges to begin with, and I did a lot of walking the corridor, which I think helped. I was driving again 2 weeks later, healed like a dream.

There is no chance I would even consider doing it the other way now x

Cherryana · 22/10/2022 15:05

I had one emergency c section and had a good recovery. My second one was elective and was an excellent recovery eg days. The main difference was how calm it was, how I was not tired like the first one (26 hours of labour before the emergency).

I would make the same choice again. I had an intuition about complications due to my hips re a natural birth and non birth connected issues ten years later, multiple mri’s confirm this (although I had no symptoms at the time). Listen to your intuition.

FirstTimeMum072022 · 22/10/2022 19:49

Elective C section - I was up and moving within two days, they asked me to think about it and to be honest the more I thought about it the more adament I was. If I was to have another child I wouldn't even give it a second thought.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 22/10/2022 20:09

Dreamsi · 22/10/2022 13:34

I’ve been put in for it but was told ‘it’s not necessary and to think about it.’ This has made me second guess myself. My circumstances are that I live an hour from hospital, I have no support for the birth and I am very emotionally fragile. I do have some support at home, cleaning, cooking etc. I felt more comfortable with a c section even though it still terrifies me. I’m really low and now confused after this comment. If anyone has elected this was it right for you?

I asked for it early on and was supported fully by my obgyn. I have a chronic hip injury and was worried about further damage by giving birth and then requiring orthopaedic surgery to repair it. I was scheduled for the c-section one week before the due date. Baby was breach late in 3rd tri and I had gestational. I told ob I was nervous with surgery scheduled too close to due date and she gladly moved it up by a week which was still safe. Had an easy and uncomplicated surgery and recovery. I am a single first time mum and was fine caring for my nb.