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Low self esteem, social situations

1 reply

mabel12345 · 17/10/2022 20:43

I feel very sad as I had another bad experience at social event. I went to a work do yesterday and I was so very awkward each conversation, didn’t feel like a part of the group (I only work 2 days a week), didn’t feel comfortable, just wanted to go home, even tho really wanted to have a good time. I’m for a different country which doesn’t help !
It was always hard for me to make friends, I need a lot of time to start to feel comfortable around someone, I just wish people actually saw me as an interesting person to speak to, I can be funny, I just can’t do large groups as I always feel intimidated and “worse” than everyone. Could really do with some advice on how to be more confident and “interesting” for others, fit well better within a group. It was the same at school, uni and now jobs. It makes me feel very insecure and isolated. I have a loving husband and group of friends but I just want to be better at social contacts, never feel like anyone else in a group had the same problem, just me being outsider for no apparent reason.

OP posts:
dontgobaconmyheart · 17/10/2022 22:50

I don't really have any advice OP, but I sympathise. I really struggle with the same, could have written that and it can be so exhausting. I imagine you're already more than 'interesting' enough or nice enough to be someone other people would want to speak to or be friends with - it's just getting that to translate in those social situations isn't it, and then dealing with the knock when you feel you didn't get it right as well as wondering when you will get it right so you can enjoy the social life you want.

I think I'm a nice person, an interesting person, funny enough, a lot of good things so I'm not ever quite sure it's self esteem related but something else. I don't have any of the issues with people I know well who I feel 'safe' or comfortable with- I just can't seem to perform well or know what to do in those situations and often wonder if it would be worth my while being assessed for adult autism or adhd.

As I say, no useful advice but with you in solidarity.

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