Nervous about driving

[EnormousStuffedMarrow]

I'm not sure anyone can help with this but just want to get it off my chest.

I passed my test a few months ago and have driven as often as I can since then. I had a few weeks off because I was really unwell with Covid but I try to go out in the car 3 or 4 times a week.

I am so nervous though. On Saturday I drove to the hairdresser and all the time I was having my hair done I was worrying about driving back.
I made a mess of getting out of the car park. My spatial awareness is not great and parking is always anxiety provoking.

At the moment I'm just sticking to the same local journeys because the thought of going anywhere different is terrifying.

I didn't like my instructor at all so don't want to go back to him for top up lessons (if people do that).

I've got to keep doing it because otherwise I'm trapped at home but at the moment it makes me want to cry most days.

Little and often - try and pick quieter times to build your confidence. I had some top up lessons with my old instructor after I had an accident and it helped a lot. You can always find a different instructor if you don't like yours.
Just try not to panic - it will come together.

I passed 12 years ago and am still nervous! I still can't do parallel parking well so I avoid it. I often park a couple of streets away for easier parking! However, on a positive note I do feel it's liberating being able to drive. I can drive the kids to activities and parties. I've done several long drives, 3 or 4 hours away to get to holidays destinations or visit friends and family. There are certain drives I avoid - if I'm seeing my parents (6 hour drive away) I'll take the train. I'll avoid certain very busy motorway roads in the outskirts of our city.
So just keep practicing, little and often. Do you have a partner? I found that driving to new places with my DH was helpful. I just felt more confident having someone there. I could ask for advice when unsure and knew he could take over if needed. Once I've done a route a few times I'm OK with it. You will build your confidence over the months and years ahead but it's OK if you're always a little nervous. You'll find ways to manage it. If 8 have to drive somewhere new I'll examine all the different routes in Google maps and often take a longer route if it looks like easier roads.