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Original poster

Do you ever casually google your ex-es? (Lighthearted not stalking!)

30 replies

StillMedusa · 17/10/2022 00:46

Up late and randomly decided to google my first serious boyfriend.. finally found him on Linkedin Grin He's not looking too bad and I'd have definitely been richer if I'd stayed with him after Uni!

Then googled the two biggest loves of my life... one as a teen, and one at university... the heart stopping crushes that went no where. Neither has aged particularly well but it's kind of comforting to see them doing nicely.

One to my utter surprise is running a car dealership in my county and I am ever so tempted to go look at some fancy cars just to see what he's like in person now Grin ...and to see if he recognises me. He practically lived at my home (due to his own being awful) as a teenager but he never knew I had a massive crush on him! (I'm happily married for 30+ years btw and do not fancy the middle aged version!)

Does anyone else do this or is it just me?!!

OP posts:
Lessofallthisunpleasantness · 17/10/2022 00:53

It has been known to happen.... Never found them though....

BlackberryCat · 17/10/2022 00:54

I thought everyone Googled their Exes! 😂

One of mine is married with kids and running the family business. I’m so glad he is doing well and seems happy.

Another went through some tough times but is running his own business and seems to be doing well.

Another died of cancer.

RosalindsAFuckingNightmare · 17/10/2022 01:01

Careful with LinkedIn - they get a message telling them who has searched for them if they have premium. Yep, found that out the hard way!

Original poster
StillMedusa · 17/10/2022 01:05

Grin that's ok .. I don't mind being caught.. I'm just nosy ! And rather impressed how well they have all done!

OP posts:
EBearhug · 17/10/2022 01:16

I'm still in touch with most of them, so don't have to google. Got sent pictures of birds in the garden from my first kiss yesterday (that was 34 years ago...)

Have been on a WhatsApp chat with first and second boyfriends along with others, because we've all been invited to a housewarming party by someone who knows us all.

Meeting a couple of university crushes at a reunion next month, though last met not that long before covid, when it's 30 years since we graduated.

Wrote a get well soon card/letter to last serious boyfriend last week, because mutual friend told me he was in hospital - we were last in touch other than FB likes, when he rang to tell me he was having his leg amputated earlier this year. I fear he will not make 60. :-(

And I was in a work meeting last week, where I was momentarily distracted by the realisation I'd slept with two of the 5 others in the meeting at different points in the past...

I google new prospects, though.

HowVeryBizarre · 17/10/2022 02:09

I was bored last week and googled the guy I went out with for ten years, he has no online presence whatsoever which I find really strange. Resorted to death notices but nothing there either. It would have been interesting to see where he ended up, he got his first job the week after I left him (mid 20’s)!

Whizzi24 · 17/10/2022 02:15

Yep. Most serious ex looks happily married with kids but oh dear he has aged terribly.

Looking back we were so ill-suited. I was devastated when we broke up but now it hardly seems possible we were ever together! Looks like things have worked out for the best for both of us.

I am always a bit freaked out by "Facebook knows who is searching for you" posts. Luckily I don't have a linked in account!

Whizzi24 · 17/10/2022 02:17

Funniest thing was when I randomly spotted a guy I dated briefly in a Sunday Tkmes Magazine article about a new dating agency for very posh people. He was all dressed up in clay pigeon (or more likely pheasant) shooting gear and looked like the biggest knob.

Adultchildofelderlyparents · 17/10/2022 02:19

RosalindsAFuckingNightmare · 17/10/2022 01:01

Careful with LinkedIn - they get a message telling them who has searched for them if they have premium. Yep, found that out the hard way!

OMG, really? That's the end of my online "research" into exes. Feeling slightly humiliated!

HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 02:45

No coz they’re all dead. Every one of them

Changeee1546789 · 17/10/2022 02:47

RosalindsAFuckingNightmare · 17/10/2022 01:01

Careful with LinkedIn - they get a message telling them who has searched for them if they have premium. Yep, found that out the hard way!

garrrrrrgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haha oh god!

BlackberryCat · 17/10/2022 02:59

HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 02:45

No coz they’re all dead. Every one of them

Are you a serial killer? 😯

My secondary school has a Facebook page for former pupils, so it is good cyber-stalking fodder.

HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 03:03

BlackberryCat · 17/10/2022 02:59

Are you a serial killer? 😯

My secondary school has a Facebook page for former pupils, so it is good cyber-stalking fodder.

Show quote history

Haha no. I’m just not down with all these terms these days. I don’t have Facebook either. Or Twitter or tick-tock or Instagram or telegram or any other gram. I can’t keep up. I thought it was only the high school kids who used all those terms till I came on here

HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 03:08

BlackberryCat · 17/10/2022 02:59

Are you a serial killer? 😯

My secondary school has a Facebook page for former pupils, so it is good cyber-stalking fodder.

Show quote history

Haha! No unfortunately not. Two ODd and died, one was stabbed in a fight, one died at sea and one committed suicide. Obviously years after I was with them. I’ve been married since I was 19.

alotoftutus · 17/10/2022 03:16

Absolutely!

Unfortunately neither are that into social media! The "big" ex has a completely private Facebook page - although I know he's done well and is annoyingly living my dream life 😆 On my browsing/ stalking session I thought I'd read some of our years old Facebook messages. Ended up bloody hitting the thumbs up button and sent it to him - so I did the only reasonable thing an embarrassed 38 year old would do and blocked him lol

My first childhood love doesn't use social media at all. However a few years back sent me a happy birthday message on LinkedIn (it's not just us women who look up to exes). We now have a very brief catch up on each of our birthdays.

Goosygandy · 17/10/2022 03:29

I think I should be a detective! I found one of my exes by going through his companies at companies' house. I knew it was him because they have to put their DOB. Then I worked out who his partner was (different name, same address). He doesn't have an online presence, presumably because of all the companies he owned that went bust. But I found his partner and their daughter on SM, as she has the same name as him. He was always a bit of a dodgy character so it's not such a great surprise. I'm grateful I didn't end up with him.

Another one does a very similar job to me. He looks very happy and I'm glad for him as he was lovely.

One is on YouTube doing a business talk and has become a bit stuffy and corporate which is a shame as he used to be quite fun.

The last one is doing pretty well. He was my lost love. Weirdly, given we don't live anywhere near each other, he knows someone who I was briefly an acquaintance of as they are on the same board. Even if I'd known at the time though I couldn't have asked any nosy questions said anything as I'd have had to have admitted Googling the hell out of him 🤣.

Chloefairydust · 17/10/2022 03:29

Just a heads up OP, avoid using linked in to stalk exs… I think people can see when you look them up on there 😬

spicysoup · 17/10/2022 03:40

I think everyone must look up exes surely?
My first love is doing really, really well in a cool job in a creative industry . I'm pleased for him - he was a lovely boyfriend.
My arsehole university boyfriend has a mediocre job and never settled down (or at least appears not to have done). He went to a super expensive boarding school and come from serious money and always had big plans about what he would do with his life so it's surprising it doesn't appear to have happened for him.

spicysoup · 17/10/2022 03:41

comes from

EarringsandLipstick · 17/10/2022 07:15

they get a message telling them who has searched for them if they have premium

Just make sure not to be logged into LinkedIn when you search! Just search normally via Google, then you won't be identifiable (of course you'll only see limited information about them that way too)

AnnapurnaSanctuary · 17/10/2022 07:21

I have in the past although not recently. Last time I looked, one was completely bald and another had dyed his hair blond and was writing a seriously boring blog about telecommunications. Both seemed to be doing well. The other two I'm friends with on FB.

AnApparitionQuipped · 17/10/2022 07:29

No, I'd rather not know. If I found out they were dead, for example, it would stir up all kinds of emotions. I prefer to assume in a vague sort of way that they're still doing whatever it was they were doing when we parted.

Motherofalegend · 17/10/2022 07:38

Adultchildofelderlyparents · 17/10/2022 02:19

OMG, really? That's the end of my online "research" into exes. Feeling slightly humiliated!

Show quote history

Do an incognito search by changing to private view on your phone :)

not a stalker, just another like minded busybody! Lol

Catslovepies · 17/10/2022 07:49

I googled an ex I used to live with the other day - nice man, just a bit too immature/goofy and I git bored with him. I found out he'd died in March 2021 "at home siddenly of natural causes". He was single so I assume he died alone of Covid. He was Filipino and I think they had a high date rate. He was 46 . It made me very sad and I'm struggling with these feelings I have no one to talk to about - we have no mutual acquaintances. Whichever poster said she doesn't google is very wise.

BuryingAcorns · 17/10/2022 07:50

I still FB chat with my first serious boyfriend. He was an absolute sleaze but he changed my life in a really phenomenal way so I forgive him his grossness. I'm just glad I'm not married to him.

I look up my teenage love sometimes and my uni boyfriend who is at the top of his profession but I'm so glad we are not together. The teenage love is pootling along in management in some business in the Lake District. Doing fine. I often think he and I would have worked out.