Moving out of the city with pre-teens... Terrible timing?

[NewDayNewNameAgain]

Posted this in aibu but perhaps it's better here....

We live in London, great location, good schools, lovely community. However I feel, and have always felt, very hemmed in.and would like to move to a medium sized town - with rail links into a city, but obviously much easier access to countryside.

Can't move for another couple of years when the kids would be in years 6 and 4 at school. Is that a terrible time to move, from their perspective? Making friends is one thing and adjusting to a quieter environment just as they begin to head into the teenage years.

Would they hate me for taking them away from all London has to offer through teenage years, or would it be ok as they would still not yet have reached the stage of pushing independence anyway?

I think you'll get a variety of answers, especially from people who have done it, but I wouldn't move them out at that point. Most children like things to do and cities are great for that. If they've grown up in the countryside they'll be fine travelling in, but I'm not sure long term what benefits there will be for them moving out now? Your older one in particular runs the risk of saying you've taken them away from friends and so on.

Equally, my idea of countryside may be a lot more rural than yours

We are in a market town. From about years 7 to 10 it was ok provided you could give lifts whenever they wanted to meet up with friends (secondary schools have huge rural catchments) but from about that age on mine found the whole place really boring, there isn't even a MacDs here just Subway, Costa etc and started to take themselves off to the bigger towns, by themselves during the day but needing lifts in the evenings (any time they want to go to eg cinema). There just isn't much for teenagers to do here unless they are part of organised sports clubs etc and then you find yourself driving all over the county for fixtures etc.

Hmm interesting.

I grew up in a tiny village and wouldn't want that for my kids (or for myself - the amount my mother had to drive me around was insane!).... But had thought a bigger town (45k people) may just about offer enough in terms of activities etc.

Interesting about big catchments.

@EerilyDevilled approx what size market town is yours? The one I grew up near was about 10k and tbh had little offerings for teens. We just went to the parks and got drunk until we could get served in the pubs!
@jevoudrais yes, I'm afraid of the removal of friends. But tbh, catchments of secondary school where we are now make it quite possible that they need to make a new friendship group anyway....

Thank you both for replying. I know I'll get differing opinions, just looking for elements of consideration really!

It's about 20k people now, but has increased from about 12k in the last 30 years due to massive amounts of nee build estates. We have a decent sports centre and skatepark but not much else. However there are clubs and classes for just about every hobby you can think of, all the sports, dance, drama, Scouts, Guides so its not all bad news at all. Just a lot of driving. And there is quite a bit of drinking in the parks.

I think if you moved to somewhere like Chelmsford you'd be OK, but I wouldn't call that countryside. I think anywhere smaller after living in London would be very hard for the children.

I grew up in a tiny village and loved it. I have lived in cities and don't love them, they were OK for a period but I've always loved the country life. Probably depends on your hobbies too, we are into horses and dogs, so the countryside works very well, cities don't.

Thanks both x

Interested to hear from others with experience if anyone's about...

Hi, I've recently done just this - moved from London to outskirts of a much smaller city with a Y6 and Y4 year old child. It was stressful, but really glad we've done it. The kids have adjusted to new schools and have new friends, and don't miss London much at all now, though it was hard at first. Think if we'd waited til the eldest was at secondary school and really starting to appreciate London it would've been a different story! Feel free to PM me if you want more details.

@Hilda41 oh great, thanks so much I'll message x