Thoughts on age of child traveling alone on train from London to Preston

[Shitfather]

DS is 11 and I’d like him to start traveling to see family. We have taken the route together many times, but I need a few days to myself to sort out some legal shit. He is very sensible, will have his phone, and charger. I will put him on the direct Avanti train nearest to the conductor’s cabin. A family member will be at the platform to collect him. Any thoughts?

I will let the train guard know he is traveling and will be collected at the platform.

How will that help?

The train guard has to go up and down the train, and deal with safety stuff. Their job isn't to look after unaccompanied minors.

Also lots of 11 year old secondary school boys look like much younger children in comparison to their female peers, especially out of school uniform. So unless random strangers regularly mistake your son as being a year or two older so think he will stand up for himself if they hassle him I wouldn't do it.

Would he know what to do if the train was cancelled before he got to Preston? Would he know how to change platform or get to a replacement bus/coach service, for example?

At age 11? Not a chance. 13, yes if they were sensible but 11 is too young. It's not the job of the train manager to keep an eye on him, there is far too much potential for things to go wrong (especially with the state of train services right now), and there is no trusted/known adult within easy reach of him for a stretch of 200+ miles. That's a long way if it all goes tits up, imagine explaining to the police why your child was found wandering the platform at Arse End of Nowhere, 120 miles from home, after his train was cancelled and he got lost in the scrum of people trying to find a replacement train to get on.

Could your family member at Preston not come and get him if you paid for their ticket?

I'd be nervous no matter how responsible your ds is. It's other people I'd be worried about.
The old saying you can never be too careful is one that definitely applies when it comes to kids.

Good point about what would he do if something happened and he had to get on another train or something. I was turfed off a train to London once due to an incident on the tracks and we were told there was a replacement bus service which never materialised and it took me hours to get home.

A lot of dodgy people around trains and train stations - flashers, m@sterb@tors etc and like pp say trains are unreliable with stops and cancellations. 11 years old far too young imo.

I know kids travel to school by train at that age but I'd be worried about a journey of that length. I regularly get my journey disrupted and need to navigate an alternative. Sometimes guards are amazingly helpful and others not so much so I would worry how he would r eact if the train terminated halfway through the journey. I wouldn't be any less concerned if he was near the guards office, they're rarely in it from my experience.

Could you buy him a first class ticket?
He may feel safer in 1st.

No way. There’s a difference between travelling across London where there are manned stations and lots of people about and you can call an Uber if necessary. Quite another thing to be turfed out in some small town because of a fault on the train or trespasser.

Too young. I’m a grown woman and have had some really unpleasant experiences on trains, including some drunk football fans recently, and getting stranded. I’d be more inclined to go with a coach - you can watch him get on and sit next to an elderly person and because people can’t get up and wander round when it’s moving there’s less potential for some random to walk through the carriages and come and sit next to him

DS used to do London-Leeds but he was 13 and I always got him a first class ticket as the cabins were quieter (of course no guarantee of no trouble there either)
I'd wait til 13 I think

This.

Its an awful route. Avanti don't actually have enough staff. They rely on staff doing over time to fill shifts. If they don't get enough they cancel trains at the last minute.

I travelled on the line a couple of months ago. No less than 4 trains headed south were cancelled. There were at least 5 trains worth of people on one train, reservations were pointless and announcement about alternative routes were shocking.

The journey was a nightmare. And I'm an adult.

I'm generally someone who encourages the independence of kids, but I don't think that route is reliable enough to trust it.

There's never a guarantee that a "straight through" train will make it to it's destination station. I remember DS messaging me once saying his train had terminated at a much earlier station due to lack of drivers and wanting to know how to get to his destination as the "all change" announcement was made on his train.

I used to get a coach similar distance from that age. Far fewer variables to manage.

DD took herself to the station in Edinburgh to get the train to Preston, where we met her, unaccompanied at 12 and was fine. I wouldn’t worry about this personally. If he has a phone it should be fine even if things go wrong because you can talk him through what to do.

Kids who travel to and from school on trains tend to do it with other kids from their school and in school uniform.

So if something happens another child from their school can help them or call for help.

Yes I suggested a coach further down. Would be a far safer option

12 year old girls tend to look more mature than 11 year old boys. Girls go through puberty earlier so many look a few years older than they are.

Guards are responsible for everyone on the train and are there primarily for everyone’s safety during normal travel or incidents and accidents.

They cannot be a minding service and it is unfair to put that on the guard.

By all means let him travel and have his phone charged. It is great to be independent. But let him rely on you.

I started taking trains by myself from eight. From the north, change at Crewe and onto Euston. Then had to get across London to Victoria where I got a bus to the airport. I was a big worrier as a child and I found it very stressful. I was constantly worried about missing the connections. By eleven I was used to it. This was back in the seventies when parents didn't seem to GAF, well mine anyway. I think if your son is happy to do it I would let him.

This might sound over protective but I'd worry about him being groomed for county lines. Lovely cool teenager tells him he'll give him £50 if he just drops a backpack that his brother 'forgot' off at the station. Etc.

I’d say fine as mine makes a similar journey younger than yours but I’m not familiar with London so it’s up to you. If you think he can manage it then go for it. Independence is good for kids

How does he feel about it?. I used to travel 5/6 times a year from S/west to Glasow to see my dad from about 9 & My kids stared doing that journey at about the same age. It took around 9hrs. I never experienced anything negative and my kids haven't either. If he feels confident than i would go for it.

Feels a little young for me. Especially, asothers have mentioned, if there are cancellations or he has to swap trains. I'd definitely buy a first class ticket at least.

There’s frequently a load of coaches parked at Preston. Make sure the train is definitely going all the way.