Has a single thought ever changed your life?

[Entstoryench]

I've been reflecting on how important thoughts are, and how one thought can just change your life dramatically.

One example: when I was in my teens and early twenties, I was overweight. I was miserable and had no confidence. I always assumed that I always would be overweight and any attempts to loe weight were so half hearted.

Then one day I had this crystal clear thought: 'losing weight is completely in my control'. It sounds obvious, but I realised that if I changed my diet, I literally had the power to lose weight. Like, I actually had real control over this.

About a year later, I was 4 stone down and had to buy a whole new wardrobe of clothes. People didn't recognise me in the street and I replaced all of my old habits with lovely new healthy ones. 20 years later and I've pretty much kept it off and it was all down to that one thought that hit me like a tonnes of bricks one day.

Please share how a single thought changed your life!

I had no idea about calories or how to cook from scratch. I didn't understand that weightloss begins in the mind, and the eating side of things was secondary to the psychology. I learned that having a goal that you could visualise clearly was the most crucial starring point and that having a phrase to recite had power over my behaviour.

So I started out by finding out the calorie content of foods as my starting point (I was 20 and a bit clueless) and how many calories I needed to eat to lose weight. I literally totted the calories up on a calculator throughout the day. I started learning tips and tricks to reduce calories by swapping certain ingredients (i can elaborate if you're interested. It all seems so obvious now but I had no idea).

I learned about sitting comfortably with hunger. This was a big one. Hunger wasn't a reminder to stuff my face, but was telling me my next meal was coming soon. Sometimes I would wait for my next meal, or have a snack of fruit or a boiled egg or a small coffee. I still do this now.

I swapped all drinks for water or tea/coffee and guzzled water by the buckhead and still do now. I always imagine the water going into my organs, my skin, all of my cells. While I was waiting to lose weight, I would focus on something I could control now, such as painting my nails or putting fake tan on, tinting my eyebrows etc. I still do that now if I feel daunted by weight loss taking too long. It makes me feel less inclined to blow the diet!

Kate Moss got attacked for saying this, but I did remind myself that 'nothing tastes as good as being slim feels'. This isn't some kind of pro anorexia sentiment, but a recognition of the fact that I loved putting an outfit together and not worry that my tummy was sticking out more than the feeling that nothing fits and everything looks awful.

I learned to delay gratification. If I had a craving for chocolate, I would wait 10 minutes to see if it went away. If it didn't, I would have a small bar or a low calorie hot chocolate drink like Options. I would have at least one cheat day at the weekend and enjoy every single mouthful. I appreciated food.

My opinions on certain food have evolved with time and I have a more whole-food approach to my diet now. I eat full fat milk, avocados and cream regularly as part of my diet. I stopped drinking alcohol completely a few years ago.

I look back on my 20s as when I started taking control of my life. I don't equate slimness to beauty and don't think you need to be thin to look good. However, I did feel that I found joy in relearning how to eat and got so much pleasure from fashion and feeling good about how my clothes fit me. It sounds shallow but it had a profound impact on my life. I had previously dropped out of university and my life was a mess. The weight loss gave me the skills and confidence to go back to university where I got a first class honours, and bit by bit I built up a fab new life for myself after a traumatic few years at the end of my teens.

There is a saying along the lines of 'life's too short not to eat the cake', and I get it. We all need treats. But also, life is too short to be left with the unhappiness that many of us feel when we eat the cake too often.

I'm a stone heavier than my thinnest point in my twenties, but I just had a baby and it will come off again, like it did with my other two kids but not by accident. My weight isn't the be all and end all, but it is a reflection of my mental state and how kind I'm being to my body.

People will leave, and it is ok.

Great post and great thread!

That was to Entstoryench

Loving this thread.

The time will pass anyway - I was always too impatient to do things that took time to achieve. I put off studying because I thought it would take too long - and then I realised that however long it took, that time would pass anyway. Sounds so obvious but it was a game changer.

@Choices01 💐

"make peace with yourself"

I've always been very self-critical and as I've got older this has turned into negative chants about how things have turned out in life. I judge myself for not being in a nuclear family, not having had a linear career, for only buying a flat later in life. Some of these have been because I've taken risks and done interesting things, but I've recast them as failures. There have also been a lot of recent bereavements that have left me spinning and unhappy. I've just been going along with all this, not understanding it all or knowing what to do. Then I read that sentence above this morning and thought "that what it's about". I don't know what it means for me exactly, but it feels like a direction to go in, out of the torpor.

I was living in a flat having separated from my (abusive) exH. We were still in touch, he was on the 'it'll never happen again' talk.

It was a lovely summer's Sunday, I had a small patio area (ground floor flat) and the back door from the living room onto the patio was open, lovely gentle breeze. And I was lying on my sofa watching a film. I remember thinking what a lovely, relaxing day it was. Then it hit me. It was relaxing because I wasn't listening for the key in the door which would tell me he was home. I wasn't ready to switch off the TV and 'do something' because he would think I was lazy for laying around. And I realised, if I divorced him, I'd never have to feel that way again. I wouldn't have to walk on eggshells anymore. Within a week he showed the nasty side of himself again in a phone message witnessed by a friend. I started divorce proceedings the following day.

Now I'm married to a lovely man. If he and our DS go out for the day and I choose to lie on the sofa watching a film, I relax. I know, when he gets home either he or DS will offer to make me a cup of tea and think nothing of it. Neither one of them would consider it lazy - they're more likely to join me! Like normal human beings.

Thank you @Scrubadub . Appreciate the flowers

It is just reminder that our thoughts are sometimes out of control & that anxiety can be so consuming surrounding this. And go against our own morals at times.

we make decisions on our thoughts but some decisions are irreversible. I’ve certainly learnt the hard way & spent a lot of £££ on counselling.xx

Policewoman saying to me 'enough is enough' . I left abusive ex

Cheesy but 'you are enough' and 'everyone in life is winging it' helped me

I was working in a job I didn't like feeling stuck, dead ended and trying to work out what to do next.
All the jobs I wanted, I needed a degree for and I was panicking about how long it would take me to get there and how old I was going to be by the time I was doing anything close to what I wanted.

I kept calculating like if I am 21 now I won't graduate until I am 24 nearly 25 and then ill be at least 26 before I can get into this career and to work to the level I think I want to be at I'll be almost 30 and kept going round in my head almost convincing myself not to try and counting all those years as wasted time.

But I thought I am going to turn 24 and 25 and 30 either way. So either I am going to do it working towards something and getting results and being proud of myself, or I can be 24 and 25 and 30 and still as stuck and confused as I was at 21.
I did it, and I am proud of myself snd I am so much happier now.

I love this thread

@Houselamp I felt the same way greeting braces in my later years!!

Great mindset. 👍😊

Love this thread

For me, it was like a whispering voice at back of my head finally got sick of me not taking the hint, and one day it yelled at me. Lose the damn weight while you can.

I turned 40 in late 2020, lockdown, an awful time for everyone but I had been hoping to have a party. Instead we were at the stage when you could meet up with x amount of people at home so I saw my oldest friends and my sister with her family. I had a lovely day but realised that if I didn't fix my weight and health, my 50th could be equally as "small" if I allowed myself to stay this way, and probably get worse. I also have a long-term illness that doesn't benefit from carrying extra pounds, many people end up with mobility problems, and I hated the thought of DH having to try to haul me around.

Jan 2021 I signed up with a coach to help me understand my thought processes around eating. I lost 2 stone I think, in 13 weeks. Was closer to 3 stone off by end of 2021. This year I am doing a different online weight-loss course, and it really deals with the mindset around overeating/habits (food itself is barely mentioned!).

I was 42 earlier this month, and 4 stone lighter than my 40th. So much happier in myself. Healthier all over. I still have about 2.5 to go, and I am not very fast at doing it, but sure I will be there by 43.

Some lovely lightbulb moments on here.

Mine was when I was at school and panicking about a big project that I didn't think I'd done well enough and I had to present to the class the next day. I was in bed crying and my Dad asked what was wrong.

When I explained he just said "just think,this time tomorrow it will be over and you'll be fine."

So simple but I use it every time I'm worried about an interview, the dentist, confronting a difficult person. I think to myself "it's ok, in 4 hours / 1 hour /this tomorrow it will be done and in the past."

Aww, @CatNamedEaster Dads are lovely..

Well done! Inspirational!

I love this! 💡

There really is a God.

Yes several. I was severely anorexic, but I had this obsession with art/painting. One day I was too weak to pick up a paintbrush. I though I can’t do art if I’m like this.

It started the long road to my recovery.

Wonderful 😊