Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

DP is the ultimate mummy's boy!

59 replies

gracious77 · 10/10/2022 11:44

Every time I have a disagreement with DP, he gets his mother to ring me to try and "reason" with me! I am seriously getting the ick and considering just ending the whole relationship.

Have any of you ever dealt with mummy's boys before? How did you deal with them?

OP posts:
TheMoops · 10/10/2022 12:39

Oh my goodness... run away!
Can you imagine what a nightmare it will be if you have children?

autienotnaughty · 10/10/2022 12:43

Ewwwwwww

ScottishLavender · 10/10/2022 12:46

My god! If my adult child came running to me to sort out a disagreement with their partner, they would get very short shrift from me!

You're an adult, sort it out between you!!

Rabidturnip · 10/10/2022 12:47

JorisBonson · 10/10/2022 12:37

That would make my vagina clamp shut like a bear trap.

For me, Joris, you win the internet today for this 😃

Milkand2sugarsplease · 10/10/2022 12:52

Not a bloody chance.

  1. He should not be running to mummy
  2. He should not be getting her to interfere.
  3. If she's calling off her own bat (after he's spoke to her) he should be telling her to back off and stop interfering.

Experience with now exH tells me this won't end well for you. Talk it out with him and make changes or walk away.

Namechanger965 · 10/10/2022 12:52

I’d get rid of him. And then ring his mum and explain why, since he likes sharing with her so much.

bingbummy · 10/10/2022 12:56

I'd leave him on the basis he uses others to coerce me. I would not be able to tolerate that to be honest, obviously you can but not for long. Just end it now honestly.

So many icks, crying to mummy? Asking others to do the work for him? Can't communicate with you so employs someone else? Sharing private details so she can come in with her coersion?

User38899953 · 10/10/2022 12:58

Hi Mrs apron Strings.

Lovely to hear from you.

From now onwards my Dad will be dealing with my relationship issues. Please speak with him directly regarding your son and myself.

God my dad would thoroughly enjoy it so I was ever in this position.

Seriously though OP, leave. Now. Itll only get worse

Mulhollandmagoo · 10/10/2022 12:59

Whatttttt? what do you say to her when she rings you?

I couldn't be with someone like this, I'd have to end it.

FranklySonImTheGaffer · 10/10/2022 13:00

I'd get rid of him because that's so off putting from both of them!

Also; there are only 2 ways this will play out if you stay together - either he will continue this pattern and she will always be overstepping by contacting you to tell you how on his side she is, or he'll realise this is strange and stop going to her, resulting in her feeling like this is all your fault and making life difficult.

Browndoor · 10/10/2022 13:04

I'd definitely leave over this. Utterly toxic and immature. You can be sure all your intimate details are being shared as well.

KitchenSupper · 10/10/2022 13:06

When you do break up with him, please call his mum and ask her to let him know.

Annoyingnamechangerperson · 10/10/2022 13:07

Yeah get rid I dated a mummy's boy and to this day still get the ick

He once cried because my house had flooded and I wouldn't let his mum come and look at it.
We broke up when we booked a holiday away and he brought his mum along for the weekend. He was 34

By phoning you his mum is validating his behaviour so he won't change as he doesn't think what he's doing is wrong.

ThreeRingCircus · 10/10/2022 13:07

This is ridiculous and very unusual! I couldn't be in a sexual relationship (or any relationship) with someone that acted like they were still 12.

I would end it, and tell him exactly why. It's bizarre involving his mother in your relationship this way and you don't appreciate him roping her in to coerce you. He also shouldn't be sharing things that are private between the two of you and his age should be emotionally mature enough to actually be able to communicate himself.

If mummy dearest called me after I dumped him I'd be telling her all this too.

GeorgeorRuth · 10/10/2022 13:12

Totally get this although never a issue for me. But also I see lots of women who run to mummy over everything too..if you are old enough to have relationships/ family you are old enough to cut the apron strings. It's deeply unattractive in both sexes.

ParentallyUnprepared · 10/10/2022 13:14

When I was 16 - 19 I was in a volatile relationship. His mum used to ring my mum to moan about me upsetting her son.

diamondpony80 · 10/10/2022 13:15

This would be a dealbreaker for me. Can you imagine if you married him and had this woman as your MIL? The grandmother of your children? Him moaning to his mother about you every 5 minutes when he doesn't get his way? No thanks.

Novum · 10/10/2022 13:24

I'm amazed his mother even plays ball. I'm curious, what do you say to her? I'd simply say something like "This is between DP and me, I don't want to discuss it with you" and put the phone down.

If this is the only mummy's boy thing he does, I'd lay it on the line to him that if he ever did it again the relationship would be at an end. But if it's part of a wider problem, I'd kick the whole thing into touch.

grapehyacinthisactuallyblue · 10/10/2022 14:29

That sounds truly creepy.

AlwaysGinPlease · 10/10/2022 14:31

How do you find him attractive at all?

Bin!

barbrahunter · 10/10/2022 15:18

Reminds me of a partner I had years ago, whose mother used to make him a packed lunch for school every day...

....he was 43 and a teacher!

I dumped him.

Original poster
gracious77 · 10/10/2022 15:22

barbrahunter · 10/10/2022 15:18

Reminds me of a partner I had years ago, whose mother used to make him a packed lunch for school every day...

....he was 43 and a teacher!

I dumped him.

This made me laugh GrinGrinGrin

OP posts:
barbrahunter · 10/10/2022 15:24

I really wish it wasn't true 😂

Knackeredandstressed · 10/10/2022 15:37

His umbilical cord is still attached to mummy. Dump him!

windywoo78 · 10/10/2022 15:38

Ha ha how long have you been together? I've been with a mummy's boy for 6 years. She is so interfering - calls him multiple times a day for updates on his life Grin I do love him a lot so I wouldn't end it but it has caused problems. She invited all her friends to our wedding, tells me how to decorate our home, asks us about our sex life, gets the hump with me if she thinks I'm not looking after him properly. She's not as bad as she used to be as he's finally telling her to back off and I have too. But it's been hard work!