Do girls really need male role models? And if so how can I change it so they have them?

[GoldAndYellowDreams]

I’m a single parent to a DD, primary aged (Lower KS2)

There are no male members of staff at her school – there was when she started that worked in Years 5 and 6 but they’ve now all left and been replaced with women. She’s a girlguide so is with all girls (and will not even entertain the idea of leaving for another activity and I can’t afford to add another activity just to expose her to men). The vicar of the church the school is attached to (cofe) is male but he’s only in once or twice per term.

There are men swimming teachers but she’s currently with a woman although men are around as she’s swimming. When she moves up a stage I plan to try and get her taught by a man.

I have a sister and a mum, my mum has sisters too. I have no grandparents anymore.

She doesn’t really come into contact with men, we don't actively avoid them we just don't seem to have contact with many. There’s boys in her class but she seems to avoid them (as do most of the other girls in her class). She goes to parties of classmates and they have boys and dads and grandads there so she is seeing men and boys at these.

She sees her dad every other weekend for 1 night, and he has a dad and a grandad who see her on those weekends. Is this enough?

And if it’s not how else can I add contact with men? It’s just fallen like this, I do have friends who’re male but I tend to see them when DDs with her dad.

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It’s my sons I’m more worried for not having a male role model, however they don’t see their father at all. Luckily there are quite a lot of men at their school though, my sons had 3 male teachers, however my other son has not had any. People say kids don’t need a male role model but I don’t think that’s true, but like you I have no men in the family either no grandads uncles male friends etc.

I am a widowed parent, my sons were the same, no other males around, to be honest l didn' t view it as a disadvantage. They still grew up to be rounded kind gentle decent young men. My son 21, has been dating four years now and her family, esp her Dad and older Brother are very good to him, kind of like a second family. l wouldn' t overthink it, not all males sadly are a good infuence or good role models, although obviously alot are. As you said it is what it is, l am a firm believer that one good parent, either male or female and l know lots, are enough.

It's about having a positive male role model.
If her dad and his side are decent men, respectful of others,especially women , aren't violent etc. then yes that's more than enough. A lot more than a girl growing up surrounded by males that think a woman's place is in the kitchen for example.

When we talk about positive male role models for girls is to set expectations high for themselves and the future men they'll allow in their lives.

This.

A few positive role models she doesn’t see much is way better than lots of mediocre role models.

I wouldn't say ExH is a positive role model, his dads ok though. His grandparents are around too so there's great grandad who is amazing and really adores her (think sneaking biscuits when me/ExH have said no, giving her extra pocket money etc.)

I don’t think girls need male ‘role models’ exactly, although as many positive role models a child can have the better. I think it’s more important that they have good examples of healthy relationships where people of either sex treat others with kindness and respect.

@ClocksGoingBackwards I absolutely try to be positive about relationships around her, and try to model positive relationships.