Have realised I work with a narcissist- need survival tips

[expandabandband]

Had a complete lightbulb moment the other day and realised that my colleague is a narcissist.

I found this article and it is basically describing the last few months for me!

medium.com/@DrNicoleLipkin/how-to-work-with-a-narcissist-when-you-have-no-choice-85da0a878352

It’s a small company and for various reasons I need to stick it out for another six months… so can those who have been there give me any suggestions on how to manage the situation and come out sane?

Tip 1 - don’t be sucked in by the internet’s obsession with labelling people as narcissists. Life is grey, not black and white.

grey rock technique. Speak when you're spoken to, always neutral tone. Never make small talk, become the most boring person. Good luck.

If only that were true in her world where she is always right…

This. If you have to appear semi human for the sake of other work colleagues or to not look crazy in front of a boss, opt for “friendly but distracted” and or match their energy exactly, no more no less.

So if they are deciding to be friendly, be that exact level of friendly but don’t build off it or try to get more engagement, don’t say more than them. If they are curt or rude, say using a single phrase, don’t engage in the topic but use a similar tone to dismiss or change subject with a single phrase, no more rude, no less rude. Never act hurt, offended, angry, or be in “disbelief” at what they just said or did, just pretend you didn’t hear, pretend you don’t understand, if they try to talk again talk across them to someone else in a neutral tone.
Avoid them as much as possible but don’t show open aversion at all if you can help it.

Grey Rock and document document document

Some people are just cunts OP. Not narcissists, just downright horrible people. My take on it is, you should feel pity for them. Imagine how awful their life is, they must wake up in the morning and make it their mission to ruin people's days. It must be exhausting to keep it up, plus they truly believe they are 'badly done by' ...

@PollyCreo made me laugh and you are right. But if labelling gives me coping tips I am all for it.

thank you to everyone else. I will try this, although grey rock will be taxing for my impulsive adhd brain.

I agree: grey rock and be as boring as possible. I would use these tactics whilst finding another job.

Good luck. I’m autistic and adhd, I managed grey rock for a year before I got out.