Adult Dyslexia / poor working memory

[Rocklobstershell]

Feeling a bit lonely and thought I would start a thread to find others on common ground. I was diagnosed with dyslexia in my 30’s (50 now) prior to that I always felt a bit stupid and as if my brain didn’t work the same as everyone else’s. I used to have board rubbers /chalk chucked at me by teachers because my arithmetic was so bad and I remember one particularly horrid maths teacher going puce with rage as she failed to get me to understand the basics of 24 hour clock! I never had a problem with reading but my working memory is really bad and my hand writing is atrocious (it embarrassed me as a child and still does).

Like many people with a learning disability I found work around to cope in the workplace but always felt I was working at twice the effort of everyone else around me to keep afloat and it was exhausting!

I could never ‘wing’ anything … speaking in public / giving talks would involve hours and house of preparation and loads of prompt cards carefully cued up in case I lost my place. Not currently working atm and my confidence is pretty low exacerbated I think by the brain fog and anxiety that is the peri menopause.

Can anyone relate? All these years I’ve felt like my bad working memory has been like a dirty secret I try to keep hidden! I hadn’t realised the amount of shame I care around with me on a daily basis!

Errgh please excuse the typos!

This is me also. I’m really open now about my dreadful short term memory. Interested to hear others experiences

Abla - thank you for posting! It’s so heartening not to be alone! My memory is far worse under pressure. I’ve been known to forget names of friends when I’m having a really bad day. My nightmare scenario is at a gathering where there’s that moment where you are expected to introduce two people ti each other but their names might be on the far side of the moon as far as your concerned! Makes me want to shrivel up and die! 🤭

Op I'm with you.
I feel as if you mention dyslexia everyone jumps to 'mearns iris' the visual thing and suggests coloured overlays.

I struggle with working memory too, and learning new stuff is so hard. People sort of rattle through stuff and I come away like WTF am I meant to be doing.

The type of work I do has changed so much in the last 20 years that it really doesn't help either. Much more desk based very little practical stuff. I was the practical side of the job I was good at.

OMG peoples names. If it's not written down I'll forget it.

Back in the day of land lines and a small office passing on phone message 😳
"Eh someone phoned for you about a project" I started making notes before I let them off the phone.

My memory is terrible, I've got discalculia and I'm really bad with faces. If I tell people they think it means I can't read and write. Or they start to talk slowly to me! I have a big calendar up in the kitchen and have to write everything in it. My handwriting is awful.

Have you looked at the Made by Dyslexia campaign? Dyslexic thinking is a skill you can add to your LinkedIn profile now and the campaign puts a much more positive spin on it.

I'm sorry to hear you're having such a hard time.

Yes! Yes! The being talked to as if you’re stupid! I remember an acquaintance giving me a easy reader type book for a gift on a night out in front of lots of friends… I still remember the look of condescension on their face!

Ooo I will check that out losingit!

Do any of your DC’s have dyslexia too? I’m convinced my middle child does although school aren’t keen to assess him for it. He has ASD and an EHCP so luckily he gets some support.

Yes I'm sure my oldest 11 does. Not sure about my youngest.

Schools have never been keen to assess for dyslexia. As long as a kid appears average.

I'll look that up too. Thank-you.

I'm a teacher with 2 Masters degrees in education and hold an assessment qualification (CPT3A) that enables me to do psychological assessments and exam access arrangements. I'm a registered assessor with the British Psychological Society. However, I cannot assess for dyslexia because I have not done the appropriate qualification for that - very few people in schools have. Add to that the decimation of specialist teachers in local authorities, the shortage of educational psychologists and essentially your only hope of a dyslexia diagnosis is to get a private assessment.