Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Feel pathetic and ashamed of myself

9 replies

Lollipie · 04/10/2022 11:35

For a few years I’ve had a semi crush on my friend’s cousin, who I see maybe once a year if that. I have been in relationships throughout the time we’ve known each other (not now) and they are currently in one. I am paranoid that friend realises so try and be as breezy as possible about it, obviously not sure how well I fare. I’m friendly around him but not overboard and try to act natural.

its not a huge crush and when we’re not together I don’t think about them, it’s more one of those where you think there may be some chemistry and wonder what would have happened if the timing etc had been right.

i just can’t help but feel that I’ve made a massive fool of myself and everyone thinks it’s hilarious?! I want to be dignified about it and the next time I see them to be completely over it, reinvent myself, not seen pathetic. Does this make any sense at all? Is it possible?

OP posts:
TheSausageKingofChicago · 04/10/2022 11:37

Does anyone even realise? I have a massive crush on my friend’s brother. We’re both single but I know he’s not looking for a relationship and is still cut up about his divorce, so I just keep quiet!

Lollipie · 04/10/2022 11:38

How do you make sure you hide it? I get so paranoid.

OP posts:
Lollipie · 04/10/2022 11:41

He is tactile so will often give people big bear hugs etc or touch me when he wants something. Sometimes we lock eyes and it’s difficult not to overthink these things teenage style (“omg he loves me”!) even though I know im overthinking and being stupid.

OP posts:
Georgeskitchen · 04/10/2022 11:48

It's not a crime to fancy someone . Maybe he has a bit of a thing for you as well!! Why are you so worried? Did you try to hit on him?

Lollipie · 04/10/2022 12:53

He has a partner so it feels wrong! No I didn’t try and hit him thank god 😂

OP posts:
Lollipie · 04/10/2022 12:53

Hit ON him that should say

OP posts:
Thesearmsofmine · 04/10/2022 12:55

I doubt anyone knows or is bothered unless you are acting very obviously around him.

dontgobaconmyheart · 04/10/2022 13:30

ah, he has a partner.

I think it's very extreme to feel you're 'pathetic' and feel ashamed of yourself because you fancy someone OP, I would try to avoid speaking about yourself in that kind of context. It is what it is, you can't help who you fancy and I don't think it's that hard to not come on to someone, so just would avoid indulging spending time with him one one one or romanticising interactions that you and he have.

Surely in life we all have occasional chemistry with someone or fancy them, that doesn't mean they would be compatible with us as a partner or in bed or in any other capacity. I think it's easy to get wrapped up in the idea of someone you've known for a while and turn that into something more too.

Ultimately he has a partner. Probably best to stop giving it headspace.

CheezePleeze · 04/10/2022 13:34

It's just a crush. Most people have had them at one time or another 🤷‍♀️

It's not like you have to see him every day or anything.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread