Shutting down, not functioning personally

[CushyCushions]

Through recent events I've almost been pushed over the edge. I'm not suicidal but want to check out of life but I can't as I have a little one. They're in no risk, they're fed, watered, get fake happy mummy when they need me. What do I do?

Have no family able to help or talk to. Husband works. I'm on antidepressants for something ages ago but I feel life has won and I don't want to play anymore. But I don't want to take my life 😆

Go back to your GP. You might need to up your dose, or change to a different one. I'm sorry you are feeling this way

Please see your GP OP. I felt similar a few months ago; not suicidal but was just done and broken. They recommended therapy so have referred me and I’m on antidepressants. Gutted to be on antidepressants but the relief I felt was astonishing; no negative thoughts. It’s nice to just give my thoughts a break for a while as that’s what I needed - to switch my thoughts off. Obviously it might not be right for you but you need to open up to someone professional. Sending lots of love and empathy xx

I’m so sorry to hear you’re feeling like this, life can be so shit and hard sometimes.

Have you spoken about how you feel with your GP or another health professional like a health visitor? It’s not always easy to access but there is support out there.

I was suicidal many years ago and still sometimes want to check out of life but I’ve had, and continue to have, talking therapy and I’ve found that really helpful.

It’s not much comfort when everything’s awful but I always try to look back and remember all the things I’ve survived to remind myself things can get better. I’ve survived 100% of my days alive so far (so have you!) and the bad bits have always been followed by better bits eventually.

Thanks everyone. I know I'll get through it but it's scary having these thoughts of giving up to the point of just operating like a robot I.e. feed, clothe, sleep repeat, try not to cry, fuck the tidying up.

I know what you mean OP, have been the same myself. Something I found helpful was doing anything where you can switch off for a bit- for example go for a swim or a walk. Watch a film. Sounds trite I know but it can help a little

Google Homestart in your area - they are a fantastic support. If you have a child under 5 they can be a friendly face each week who doesn't care if the house is a state but can be there for you. They also have access to other support.

Also your health visitor will know of things that can help.

You can self refer for therapy (google IAPT and your area) but I know finding time to access this without your child can be hard.

Life really is hard sometimes, and without support and childfree time to decompress it really is harder. Do look for support, and know it does get better.

I am worried about Homestart as sometimes i wonder at what level does your house need to be before they have a duty to report to social...not that I personally think it's that bad but it's all perspective isn't it.

One of my friends is a Homestart volunteer. They are there to help not judge.