straw poll - minimum interval between evening meal and bed?

[PorridgewithQuark]

Juggling sports training in the evening and young to mid secondary age children needing a bedtime to get enough sleep on a school night.

What would you say is the minimum interval between evening meal and bedtime?

Can't eat before training (both due to parents work and because the kids say it makes them feel sick and run slower).

10 mins. Nothing too heavy obviously.

In this scenario I’d do a light high protein snack before training then a lighter dinner an hour before bed (assuming I’d then have another twenty mins or so digesting while I brushed my teeth, got pjs on and settled down to sleep).

I'd say about an hour for a big meal.
On DC's swimming/football days they eat a small quick meal usually pasta or rice based about an hour and a half beforehand then something small like cottage cheese on toast and a yogurt or banana when they get back and go to bed about 40 mins.
We've experimented as they had the feeling sick thing too but also felt sick if they ate too much too close to bedtime. This seems to work for mine.

Thanks for the responses so far!

Atm training for my younger two starts (in two completely different locations) at 5:30pm and I finish work half an hour's drive away at 5pm at the earliest - DH usually but not always works from home until 5pm.

So they're eating a protein bar at about 4:30pm and both cycling (in different directions) to training (though DH drives the youngest if he asks) to training, leaving at 5. They get home at 7:30 but need to shower before dinner... We're eating at about 7:45pm but this is quite late for the youngest who usually goes to bed at 8:30pm because he has to get up at 6am...

I guess it's probably okay...

Alternative is to prepare a meal for them to eat about 3pm (both can cook especially the older of the two but he only cooks for the whole family - if it's just for the two of them it'll only ever be pizza...)

This is two evenings per week

Maybe shower after dinner?

I'd say an hour but by secondary school age mine were both staying up till 10.30ish (get up at 7) and certainly by about age 14 some of their sports, Explorers etc weren't finishing till 9-9.30. They eat a lot of pasta.

I'd say 30 minutes, as that's the amount of time recommended between eating and toothbrushing. In your situation, I'd make a hot meal for 3pm, and then another heavy snack (sandwiches, baguettes and baked beans) for 7.30 then they can shower afterwards.

The 15 year old can stay up until he chooses to go to bed (usually goes at 9:30 unless he wants to watch football on TV tbh).

The 12 year old really couldn't cope with doing that (they have to be at the bus stop at 6:30am on school days).

I do still read to the youngest so that means he's not actually trying to get to sleep until 9pm. Actually perhaps that makes the interval between meal and bed okay.

They come home drenched in sweat from the combination of fairly full on training then cycling looking as though they've jumped into a swimming pool outside the house, so even if it isn't raining they really need to shower and put on dry pyjamas or sweats before sitting anywhere 🤣

Making a hot meal for 3pm will mean me cooking in the morning before work and leaving it to heat up, which I selfishly don't want to do, but I could... 🤔

When it was only one of them on this schedule I used to buy beige freezer food which he would stick in the oven if I was going to be at work, but I'm not sure whether that's actually the worst option as it's twice per week now - I used to be home in the afternoon and evening sometimes.

Ironically I used to work long shifts and then the food for them to cook themselves was sometimes necessary, but other times I'd be off during the week and around to cook early. I switched to days not long ago to be around more and it actually works less well 😭

I do also prefer us all to eat together, it's also one of the reasons I switched to days instead of variable shift pattern work. But the best thing to do might not fit with my preference!

Could you make dinner in advance and freeze it - say a home-made soup - and serve with good bread and sprinkled cheese? it’ll take minutes to warm up whilst they shower and isn’t not too heavy to sleep on?

Sounds fine! Mine are primary aged. We eat dinner 7:30-8:30 on a weeknight, depending on when we finish work and manage to get it organised. They go up to bath and bed immediately after so 8:30-9 ish.

That said if only 2 evenings a week, I’d do a simple batch cooked meal or sandwich on those nights.

Is there any way you could drive youngest to school? 6:30am bus sounds very early if having a busy evening before. In secondary school, it wasn’t unusual for me to be at events/sports til 10pm, so a 5:30am (?) wake up would have been very early.

I have similar schedules for 2 of mine. Do like toast and cereal before training(or something similar)
Dinner after. 830pm latest. Something simple like pasta. Start moving to bed 930 or later on these nights.cant do it any earlier. Shower when they get back, before dinner.

Have a sandwich or chips in the car on the way back?

I would not be arsed cooking that late at night, goodness me.

There are no cars involved as they cycle and they are very literally at training in opposite directions (5 miles south of the house for the 15 year old, 3 miles north of the house for the 12 year old) so eating in cars doesn't work. Even if we drive the youngest it's only 5 minutes or less in the car (everything is a distance away but we have very little traffic) so just him eating in the car wouldn't achieve much.

They have sandwiches or similar for lunch (no school meals available) so I do think need cooked dinner.

I think people are saying an hour between eating and actually sleeping is ok, and if that's the consensus I think it's probably okay as we're doing it actually, as the youngest is going upstairs at 8:30 but that's not when he's actually trying to fall asleep.

I appreciate the suggestions - driving the kids to school wouldn't make sense in our situation; the kids wouldn't want that as all the kids locally travel by bus or cycle and driving them daily would be an impractical idea for various reasons.

mindutopia luckily no regular organised activities for under 16s locally run that late where we live - all the kids have early starts because they all catch early buses and school starts early. Obviously parties and one offs are an occasional exception, but it's not until 16+ that weekly sports training type stuff runs that late.

That's why I initially asked about the interval not times on the clock. I didn't want to discuss bedtime and getting up time by the clock as we're non UK and our non negotiable day runs at least an hour earlier compared to most UK school and activity days.

I would batch cook some meals to stick in the freezer. Get one out first thing in the morning to defrost, then all the boys have to do is heat it up when they get home from school. We've usually got homemade spag bol, burgers, meatballs, lasagna, soup etc in the freezer. Then they can just have some toast before bed if they are hungry.