Husband bugging me about buying a house

[heartbroken22]

And my heart isn't set on any we've found. They just don't feel right. We're currently renting and I feel very comfortable here. But I've not found a house I actually like...is this normal? Both my kids have grown up here it's been 4 years..why can't I find anything I like? The last two we went to was quite small and the other had the ceilings too low...

Gosh. Lots of questions spring to mind.
If you don't mind , can I ask...

You are currently in rented but I'm assuming that you are of a certain age as your children are adults. Have you 'come into money' by any chance?

Is it his money or your's?

Are you happy in your current home and the thought of living somewhere else worrying you?

If you're happy to buy, are you looking for specific specifications?

Is your husband, your children's father? If not, are you contemplating leaving the home that your children grew up in?

I only ask as sometimes our judgement can be clouded.

Is the house you’re renting more than you can afford to buy, so you’re struggling with accepting that anything you buy will be less than your rental accommodation?

Also, why is he bugging you about this?

Are OPs children grown up, she doesnt say, she says they have grown up here, meaning they have lived there all their lives but we dont know how long that is

I think OP rented if you can afford to buy, is a poor long term decision, what are you going to do when you're retired and still paying rent

Landlords can up and sell at any point and its hard to find something new.

I guess as it’s four years and they are throwing money away on rented when they could buy and pay their mortgage off.

Oh, @Thestagshead , I thought that it meant that they'd been looking for four years.

I think thats what the poster means?

They've been looking for 4 years and throwing away money on rented. Id be bugging her too.

Unfortunately this is often the case when you move from rented to buying: what you can afford to buy isn’t as nice as the property you are renting.

The pay off is the security of owning your own home.

I'm concerned at why she can't find anything in this timeframe.
I think there's more to this.

She already set it out in the OP, she likes where she is, the children have grown up there and she feels comfortable

That provides very little motivation to attach to something else

Yes I think they have been looking for four years and the op hasn’t found anything she likes

a lot of people rent what they couldn’t afford to buy but four years is excessive and with the increase in house prices in four years and how much they’ve spent on rent in that period the ops refusal will have cost them a small fortune. I’d be bugging her too.

Could be lots of reasons. You could try looking a few miles further than where you’ve been looking. Look at properties 10-25 k more than you can afford, that sometimes shows you what you’d really like, what is important to you.
Also look at cheaper properties as you’d then have money to change things you don’t like, new windows, change the kitchen, add another bathroom.
You can’t change the location of a house —- pylons, view, busy road etc… but changing the feeling of a house inside is relatively easy.
Make 3 lists. 1. What a house must have. 2. What you won’t live with. 3. What you’d like the ideal house to have. Then you can see what you can add to an ok house to make it ideal.

OP, please come back and tell us what's really happening.

Gawd its not some great mystery, she doesnt want to move, she says as much in the OP!!!

I guess your husband wants to stop paying your landlord's mortgage and start paying your own so you have an asset? The longer you leave it the harder it gets as you may have to shorten the mortgage term as you get older and prices rise.

However once you buy you are less able to leave if you want to, it is a bigger commitment than marriage in a way.

I expect you didn't love your rental when you first moved in. A house is really just a box, we pick one and live in it and it is through living in it that it becomes a home.

@heartbroken22

I'm sorry to ask, but does your user name have anything to do with not wanting to move? Is the money an inheritance or insurance pay out?

We want to help, just most of us are just a wee bit confused.

If it's for sentimental, I will totally understand.

A house is really just a box, we pick one and live in it and it is through living in it that it becomes a home

That is such a lovely attitude @lannistunut