So my 9 year oldHas gone to bed in a strop, I know he will try and carry it on in the am

[LovelyYellowLabrador]

How do I deal with it

he was doing something he shouldn’t been
so I asked him not to and explained why

then he Rudely replied
how long is this conversation going to go on for ….

then wanted to go off to bed in a huff

thjng is he’s so stubborn
I know he will just carry it on tomorrow am

what should I do ?

My dd was like this for a short while.
We told her to drop the attitude, she needed to walk out the room, drop her attitude and come back in a better frame of mind. Worked. This phase didn’t last long.

As your ds becomes a teen you will need to let things go quicker or your head will be wrecked. So you called him on his cheekiness then forget about it. Don't bring it into the next day. Start each day fresh . If he brings it up, which l doubt he will, just say today is a new day..He can learn from you how to let things go.

Threatening to tell his teacher is weird. Don't involve them.

He's 9 and you're the parent. Help him navigate his feelings. Don't let him ruin his or your Sunday. Explain to him it's done we don't carry on being upset and get him doing something else so he's distracted.

I feel you're giving him way too much power over the situation.

Well, personally I agree with that. It's better to teach/let them only apologise when they mean it.

Don't threaten to tell his teacher, that's making her seem more important than you.

(I understand your thinking, but It's really not the best way to deal with this)

I'd have let him go off to bed in a huff. In fact 'let' is probably the wrong word! I'd have sent him to bed (without devices) & told him I would not be spoken to like that!

if he's being a little mardy arse in the morning I'd tell him to Hoover the stairs & hallway (or whatever)

if he's in a cheerful mood I'd let it go, but at some point in the day I'd remind him that his attitude last night was completely unacceptable & I don't want to have a repeat because it creates a horrible atmosphere which you do not & will not tolerate and he won't like the consequences.

Don’t threaten to tell his teacher, it’s odd and IMO could make look a bit weak to him- like you need another authority figure involved.

Just carry on as normal in the morning. If he’s in a strop, talk about it. My son can be a bit like this because he’s embarrassed he got into ‘trouble’, so we explain that what’s done is done and we all move on. Any further stropping then I probably would ignore.

Even threatening to tell his teacher makes no sense, his teacher should be able the threaten telling you about their bad behaviour not the other way around, you're the one they should not want to find out.

As for today, just crack in as normal, I would. if they were grumpy I'd ignore it, if they brought the subject up I'd just say "we resolved this yesterday, we're not talking about it again" if they persisted they'd be sent to their room while I cracked on with things that I need doing. The world does not revolve around their moods.

It’s only slightly cheeky- I’d have said “ Oi! Don’t be so rude!” and left it at that.

You’re massively overreacting and overthinking this

Please do not involve his teacher...

Even as a threat it's odd.

Just ignore it, it doesn't sound a massive deal to be honest so I'm not sure I'd even force an apology out of him. Kids can be stroppy and as long as the behaviour isn't escalating or he's like it 24/7 I'd put it down to a kid being in a mood and get on with your day.

The scooting down the stairs doesn't sound like it needed a massive explanation in all honestly - so he may just of felt a bit patronised maybe?

You both sound a bit dramatic. How long did the lecture go on for for something so small?

Thanks so much for all the advice
it actaully didn’t go in that long at all as it was just before him going to bed

i didn’t even lecture him that long about why not to scoot down the stairs on his bum just explained why it’s not a good idea
atm
didn’t on and on

It would be a minor comment in our house and then gone. Are you always this intense? Might explain why your son holds on to things!

You need to let go of the teacher thing, that's just odd

It’s a small thing don’t make it bigger than it needs to be

That would have just been a “excuse me young man. You do NOT speak to me like that, it’ll go on as long as I say it will!” And then forgotten.

You really are overthinking.

Thanks for the advice
I am over thinking
as I’m stressed about other things
he’s woken said morning then said sorry about yesterday
so I said that’s fine it’s a new day today
lets start again

Some parenting posts are ridiculous.. this is one of them!

He went down the stairs on his bum & you told him off for it.

If he does keep bringing it up its probably because he's frustrated for being told off for something so trivial. Hes 9, Just explain why you were annoyed at it and tell him that's the end of the conversation.

And please do not tell his teacher.

Sounds like a good result.

Honestly I think you’re going to need to reassess parent / child relationships if you’re this stressed over an innocuous comment like that.