Early 40s getting fatter by the day,send solidarity

[Defeatedbylife]

I've always been fairly slim,till this year.Im 43 havent drastically changed my eating habits but seems like every mouthful is now adding a pound.im still exercising three times a week and run around after kids daily.has it all just caught up with me??sob!im on week three of eating mindfully, ie not stuffing myself, limiting sweet stuff but the scales have continued to climb.ive gained a stone and half since January.

What can i do?!feel i can't eat any less and move any more!do i admit defeat and just go till bust!haha joking a little bit,so fed up of it!

Interested in @EarringsandLipstick and @notacooldad mentioning weights. I run but have never done weights, and am kind of interested in this as a way forward, because apparently it also is really good for mood?

It is definitely helping me.
I'm 57 and started going through the menopause last year ( but still having periods)
I started using weights when I was about 20 and it was quite niche then. Long story short at around 50 years old I lost my mojo, couldn't be arsed with much, got a chocolate habit and got fat. This continued for ages.
I did the gym but it was hit and miss and a half hearted effort. However about 8 months ago I made a commitment to myself. 4 times a week, work hard but not long. Right away the buzz came back. Loving it and regret my wasted years.
I look nearly 'not so bad'!!! Joking! I'm pleased with my progress but most off all my attitude. I want to see my friends again,I make plans, I have people around at my place, all the things I gave up on.
I love buying fashionable clothes again.
It's been a game changer.

How do you “do weightlifting?” I mean, I know you can pick up weights, but how do you know what exercises to do? Do you follow a programme
If you havent done it before I would strongly recommend advice from a gym instructor. I would start off with lighter weights until your technique is bob on.
I have my own programme that I will follow for 2 months and then mix it up.
All exercises I tend to do 3 sets of the exercise doing 12 repetitions of the exercise to the point of failure ( where I cant do another reptition)
There is a wealth of info on YouTube for beginners that would be good to watch.

But I'm sticking to low calorie and mostly eating fruit and veg, very low (if any) carbs. (No bread or pasta etc for weeks).

I've upped my protein and remembering natural fats.

And today my scales say I'm 6lb lighter than I was 2 days ago 🤷‍♀️😃

Weight training just seems to make my thighs bulge and my jeans tighter,also my flabby arms turn into popeyes arms without getting thinner!i want long and lean not muscly and bulky!

Weight training just seems to make my thighs bulge and my jeans tighter,also my flabby arms turn into popeyes arms without getting thinner!i want long and lean not muscly and bulky!
Sounds like you need a plan suitable for your needs.
I lift heavy ( for me) and have gone down a dress size, nearly 2. My jeans are definitively not tighter. I have lost 2 stone but I have increased my calories to around 1800. I do watch what I eat but that doesn't mean I don't have a drink or some treats (Yum Yum's are my weakness!)
For me, the key has been consistency with the training programme and good quality calories most of the time.

This is all quite inspiring! I'm definitely going to look into this.

Combining weights with cardio stuff sounds good. I really like the feeling of having got out of breath (running does this for me - although my joints aren't great, so I have to be careful with it). I wonder whether weights are also potentially good for joints??

I wonder whether weights are also potentially good for joints??
My doctor says yes. I was worried but got told that it actually helps. Weight lifting is really important to women post menopausal for various reasons which are talked about in the linked article.
Of course, don't just weight lift if you enjoy other activities such as cardio but if it is something you haven't done before I would advice you to consider it. My biggest safety advice is to get someone to check your technique to make sure you are lifting safely.

Worth a read
www.feistymenopause.com/blog/liftheavyweights#:~:text=It%20stimulates%20muscle%2Dbuilding%20stem%20cells.&text=Resistance%20training%20is%20the%20best,as%20estrogen%20declines%2C%20Sims%20says.

Sending solidarity from 46 year old me.

I find I’m getting horrendous cravings around ovulation and my period. Of course mentioned it to my GP and she just looked me up and down and probably thought to herself ‘another middle aged woman who can’t control herself around food’. I swear on the bad days it’s like I’m possessed or a heroin addict (except with food, not drugs). I wake up at 5am so hungry I can’t get back to sleep and I have to resort to the vending machine at work for crisps at 11am or I can’t concentrate. Then on other days I’m fine.

I’ve gone back to weighing myself daily. In just over a week I’ve lost over a kilo. Seeing the numbers really helps my motivation.

You are me OP. I'm genuinely distressed about it, because I am quite vain.

To lose any weight at all all I have to do strict intermittent fasting, low carb, no booze and walk for at least an hour and half four times a week.

Currently I don't have the time for the exercise and it's harder to do as it gets darker at night, and I need the booze.
But I really must get a handle on it as it's making me extremely miserable.

I found it also linked to how tired I was - was always able to eat what I wanted but kids means sleep was screwed. Now sleep is better, I don't eat to stay awake/stop myself screaming, so some weight loss is happening from not eating crap.

I know diet is the Biggie but actually I'm finding exercise is helping me sleep and toning makes a big difference to how clothes fit and how I feel about body shape.

I think we do need to accept body is different in middle age and post kids so would avoid starving yourself to get back to a weight that you are unlikely to be able to maintain now. Don't think about weight so much as inches lost on waist or way clothes fit. If you end up a size higher than you were but you are more active and clothes sit well, you will be able to manage this for years rather than chasing an unrealistic 'ideal' weight. I also had to learn which clothes suit this body shape, having been straight up and down all my life.

I do Jillian Michaels at home and run when in the mood. Got a few things going on in life until spring, then am thinking of paying a personal trainer to show me weights at home and then including that. I find I do exercise at home as can fit it in more easily. We don't have a massive house, I do it in the kitchen, half an hour 5 times a week.