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Original poster

Splitting finances... when one inherited the house

44 replies

HouseNC · 18/09/2022 11:35

Basic situation is - following a family bereavement, I was lucky enough to inherit a house and now live mortgage free, but didn't inherit any cash beyond that. Obviously the bills still need paying as normal.

DP and I are talking about moving in together. He is renting and would be unlikely to be able to get a mortgage alone, certainly not on a house as nice as the one I inherited. Neither of us have kids, and nor are we planning them. We are both in work.

I can see two ways of doing things financially, but I'd love to know what others think would be fair

  • split all the bills equally down the middle and not charge beyond that
  • charge him what he currently pays in rent and split all the bills equally, and invest the money myself
  • charge him as above but use the money as our fund for things like holidays and emergencies

... or something else?

OP posts:
MenopauseSucks · 18/09/2022 12:22

Split all the bills. Pay for anything to do with the house - maintenance, building work - yourself.
And encourage him to save what he's not paying in rent so he won't be in the lurch should you split up.

MintJulia · 18/09/2022 12:22

I'd split the bills and add £100 a month contribution towards wear & tear on carpets and furniture. Put it in writing as a landlady/tenant relationship.

That way you both live inexpensively, your ownership of the house is protected and you both know where you stand.

Lilithslove · 18/09/2022 12:26

k1233 · 18/09/2022 12:15

Treat it like a rental - you cover landlord costs, you both cover tenant costs, he pays rent.

I would charge him rent equivalent to what he'd pay on a house share - as that is effectively what you are doing. That is because there will be more wear and tear on the property. House related bills would be yours to pay but utilities and food etc shared 50/50. It's your property so property related costs are yours, hence charging him rent.

It's only the same as a house share if he has his own private room and has equal say in decisions about the house as the other sharers. It's more like a lodger situation and where I live lodgers pay less rent for a sharers because its less attractive as you have fewer rights.

This thread is interesting as I've seen many women be very strongly advised not to pay anything towards living somewhere that they aren't on the deeds for.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General money
pattihews · 18/09/2022 12:29

Split the bills (council tax, water, fuel, insurance) and then encourage him to invest what he saves into a pension or savings account so that if you break up he has a good fund available to start again.

He's your boyfriend, not a lodger: don't charge him rent. That would really jeopardise your relationship. Imagine how you'd feel if a man who had inherited a nice house outright came on here asking if it was okay to charge his girlfriend rent in order to maintain his house and add to its value.

I think the people talking about you needing to protect your assets etc are over-reacting but half an hour with a solicitor may put your mind at rest.

underneaththeash · 18/09/2022 12:31

I'd just split the bills, you'll still be better off as you'll be paying less than you were by yourself.

Paq · 18/09/2022 12:34
  1. Split bills 50:50.
  1. Equal contributions to "wear and tear" - he lives there too! Discuss this beforehand and agree. It would be tedious if he refused to pay for e.g. lightbulbs or paint or garden stuff because "it's your house".
  1. As per others, as he is living there at your discretion he needs to save the equivalent of a deposit plus x months rent as you would be entirely within your rights to ask him to leave at a moment's notice.
Quitelikeit · 18/09/2022 12:39

Before you suggest anything to him why not ask him what he intends to pay? That will reveal a lot!!

whatever happens you shouldn’t be out of pocket but also by him moving in it creates a sort of situation where he would never want to leave as it would mean paying rent again so be careful

DisforDarkChocolate · 18/09/2022 12:43

I'd split the bills and charge a nominal rent. That way you are both better off and you'll be able to save for repairs etc. I'd probably also have a shared fun fund for holidays etc.

ThirtyThreeTrees · 18/09/2022 13:04

If I were you, I would get legal advice to protect your asset.

By him moving in and not paying rent, this is a massive saving for him. It may also be a cost to you. If you were single would you have a tenant instead.

I don't think you should profit from him moving in but don't put yourself at a loss either.

roarfeckingroarr · 18/09/2022 13:31

Half the bills plus a couple of hundred quid, depending where you are in the country and how much you earn - eg good earners in the SE - £400; less so I'm a cheaper part of country - extra £150

Original poster
HouseNC · 18/09/2022 17:13

Thanks for your opinions everyone.

While I have already done and paid for most of the major work that needed doing (e.g. replacing the bathroom) and the decorating (I paid for materials, he helped with the labour) I wouldn't expect or want him

OP posts:
Rinatinabina · 18/09/2022 17:16

Split the bills

Original poster
HouseNC · 18/09/2022 17:25

Sorry accidentally hit post too soon!

Thanks for your opinions everyone.

While I have already done and paid for most of the major work that needed doing (e.g. replacing the bathroom) and the decorating (I paid for materials, he helped with the labour) I wouldn't expect or want him to pay for structural repairs for fear of creating a Beneficial Interest.

But - wear and tear is a good point, and to be honest if he pays nothing beyond bills it feels like he's getting all of the benefits and none of the responsibility. We could both have (for example) £500pm that we're not spending on rent but his can go on frivolities (he's not terribly good at saving, while I am) while mine has to go on saving up for a new boiler / roof / something equally boring (though I'd have to do that anyway)

While I don't want to profit from him moving in per se, it would be easy to create a situation where he profits from moving in.

I'm also not keen on the idea of creating a huge / disproportionate financial incentive to stay even if the relationship wasn't really working.

OP posts:
k1233 · 19/09/2022 00:54

I agree, don't pay for a house you don't own ie do not pay for capital items such as paint, flooring etc However it's unrealistic to expect to live rent free in a property you do not own. How much to ask for is difficult to know as it depends on your area etc He will still be better off paying reduced rent and can save the difference.

I also don't see why it's on you to make sure he's well set up if you break up. Look after yourself and your interests. So many times on here you see cock lodgers. Get on to a good thing then lazy as all hell and don't contribute.

Stompythedinosaur · 19/09/2022 01:23

If you at renting to him he will gain certain rights e.g. giving a notice period when you want him to leave.

Personally I can't imagine making a profit for a partner in that way.

If neither of you need to pay for rent or mortgage, then you will presumably be able to pay towards a holiday or emergency fund if you agree this. If you charge him rent then you have full and sole control for this. Better to be equals, I would have thought.

mscampbell · 19/09/2022 14:43

I would charge him some rent, like a lodger and have him split all the bills.
Otherwise you will be saving to pay for new windows or a new kitchen or new boiler etc and he will gain the benefit of a fully maintained house for free.

It will be interesting to hear his views on the arrangement.

Obviously (apart from the lost of your family member) you have had good fortune inheriting a house - but that doesn't mean you want to gain a cock lodger or the responsibility of housing him for life, whether you stay together or not.

If you charge him some rent that means he won't become dependent on you which would have it incredibly hard to remove him if your relationship doesn't work out.

Dragonskin · 19/09/2022 17:24

I would do one of the following:
A) split bills 50/50 and either charge him a token rent which you could save towards repairs,
B) split the bills 50/50 and he buys the food
C) split the bills unevenly so he pays slightly more

I wouldn't allow him to put anything directly towards the upkeep of the property as you don't want him to be able to argue that he has an interest, but he will be making a huge saving by not paying full rent but you still need to maintain the house

You both will be making a saving by splitting bills so I wouldn't consider that as 'your benefit' of him moving in, particularly as you already have a 25% council tax discount that you would be losing

RandomMess · 19/09/2022 17:28

I would charge a nominal rent called rent plus half of bills and this is used to help cover maintenance and wear and tear. I would also w sure that the property is completely ringfenced legally.

You should both be financially better off by sharing a home not just him.

BlooberryBiskits · 19/09/2022 19:57

I would suggest you get some legal advice OP & some kind of documentation to ringfence your home as yours/his agreement to that

Life is full of unexpected turns (eg you say you both intend to remain child free but what if you have an accidental pregnancy , or you were to suffer a job loss or illness that means you are financially dependent on him etc…), also none of us know how the law re claims if cohabiting partners might change in future (eg in Australia ‘common law ‘ partners can make a claim after just 2-3 years!)

More relationships fail than last til death do us part, & so protecting yourself in this way is wise as a statement of intent

Do you have a will of your own? If not it’s also a good time to get one

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